Hi 8,

Was just reading your update. Seems your getting some effect from the Nal. Which is good, means its working in some form or fashion right?

You mentioned that you'll drink until the beers run out. Question: how is your craving level after the beer runs out? Do you have a strong urge for more or is it ok that the beers ran out? No matter the answer, you definitely know the Nal is affecting you in some way, remember if anything is different in anyway, good or bad, you know its working.

BTW I got that metallic taste in my mouth too on a couple occasions. Not sure on the smell, my wife hasnt said anything....yet.

Hang tough my friend, its just the beginning of the end for us.

Oh yes my friend, I have known from the side effects of the very first 25mg onwards that Nal has a very strong effect on me - I'm just hoping it's a good one!

My craving level after the beers run out is pretty intense, if I'm on one of my benders, and last night was no different from benders in the past. Having said that though there have already been many nights where I've seen an effect of Nal (leaving beers in the fridge at the end of the evening, not wanting the last one FOR ONCE!) so I'm not too concerned as yet, in fact things are generally positive.

Hi 8,

Boy oh boy, do I relate to what you are saying! And my anxiety was also really bad yesterday, which caused me to drink more than when my anxiety is lower. I don't know about you but some days I waken up feeling anxious, which is always a bad sign for what may follow. On some occasions, the anxiety on wakening up is related to how much alcohol I had the night before. In other instances, my morning anxiety is related to the previous night's sleep and dreams. I'm still working with my therapist to get this anxiety under control but it's a s-l-o-w process.

I hope you're having a better day today.

All the best to you.

V.

Thank you very much V, for your understanding and good wishes. My anxiety has hit me in the past in very similar ways to those you describe. When I was AF, waking with just a little anxiety, which should in theory be manageable, would rather see an increase throughout the day unless I had the support of my therapy group, or some sedatives.

With my recent increased drinking, though, the anxiety has for days now been centred on my drinking and my hangover, and I have fallen into a vicious circle exactly as LaBear described so well earlier on this thread.

It seems that around the 10-12 UK unit mark per evening sees a leap in my anxiety the next day. With the 16+ units of the last few days - even spread over the day - my anxiety has ramped up hugely. I had around 18 UK units (in the form of 9 'light' beers) yesterday (and on Saturday actually), didn't sleep at all well, and woke in a state of deeply uncomfortable panic at 6 this morning. The choice was either a sedative or a drink or two, so I chose two small glasses of wine which got me back to sleep for a bit.

Driving to the shop just now, the anxiety was horrendous, and rose into a fully-fledged panic attack, one of the worst I've ever had. I had to stop the car and chomped down 1mg valium on the spot. After calming down slightly I was able to get home, as I was only just up the road.

So, I am now about to start my second beer of the day, but have already had 6 UK units including the early morning wine. I'm just going to try to take things easier today, drink just enough to keep topped up, and hope tomorrow's a better day. It's easier said than done though, for once under the influence good intentions and common sense go out the window.

I'm a bit down right now, feeling stuck between a rock (the anxiety) and a hard place (the alcohol which alleviates it short term, but then ramps it up). Throw a benzo into the mix, which is my 'calming' alternative to alcohol, and the one that leads to less trouble - but something that may well hamper any cure - and I'm pretty well lost atm.

I've just got to try to get things back under some semblance of 'control' the next couple of days

Check this out: http://www.intellectualicebergs.org/archives/intice_10_060322.mp3

It's Dr. David Sinclair. Apparently there is a cure for panic attacks now too. You'll have to fast forward through the first segment called "Scales of Superiority" in order to get to the interview with Sinclair.

If you breathe through a hand held carbon dioxide scrubber, like those used on spaceships to clean the air it stops panic attacks dead in their tracks.

Many thanks LoOp, that sounds very interesting indeed I shall check it out later

I think I'm going to speak to me psychiatrist about trying low-dose Baclofen for my anxiety.

20 UK units yesterday, but that includes my morning tipple. Luckily the temptation didn't return today, and I'm starting very much later. I aim for less than 16 units today, and then less again tomorrow. I feel recording my units isn't going to be as significant as the number of units I crave, because due to the terrible increase in anxiety the next day after 10-12 units I will have to try to limit myself to that daily. I could easily drink 16 units every day if I gave in to craving and had no after effects to be so concerned about.

8,

Thats great your having a later start time. To me thats great progress and will hopefully end up in less units by the end of the night. I totally know what your saying about the anxiety after drinking many many units the previous night. That is part of my worst hangovers. I fear the anxiety and guilt feeling more so than the physical affects. My tolerance if very low now, so Its very easy for me to tie a hangover on. I have to be very careful if I want to avoid that.

Even if the urge is there to drink earlier, I suspect youll be drinking later more frequently as time rolls on.

Good stuff.

Hey 8 --

I just want to throw in a bit from my experience. I'm a mildly anxious guy (not taking medication) which is the primary reason I ended up in the booze hoarding business. My hangovers have always been unbearable not so much for the physical effects but for the anxiety/depression effects. And unfortunately, I am finding that my hangovers on naltrexone are WORSE from an anxiety perspective. I don't have the answer on how to get there, but I can safely say that if you can somehow reduce your numbers, your anxiety will surely be reduced. I know that's not much help, but please realize that there is a direct relationship between anxiety and how much you drink: the more you drink, the more your subsequent anxiety. Try to keep that in mind when you are getting at the end of your drinking sessions and are weighing whether to have another one or two. Consciously thinking about the impending anxiety may help you to knock off the last few drinks, which in turn, should reduce the subsequent anxiety.

My best to you.

Nick

Hi Eight, just back from a mini vacation and saw your post. Boy, can I relate. If I drink heavily the next day is murder with the anxiety,doom and gloom! Yes, my primary reason to drink! My cravings are actually anxiety for the most part. I do remember the days of pulling over the car to pop a Xanax just to be able to drive, without even water!!!!! Not really sure of the answer but think for us a bit of withdrawal causes these attacks! Good luck my friend, just white knuckled a 5 hour ride myself!!!!! People who don't have this fear have no idea how horrendous it is, and thank God they don't!

Thanks so much for the kind thoughts guys 10 UK units last night which I was very happy with as it's within my 'maintenance' range. I aim for a little more tonight, just because the beers I picked up today are stronger!

Hapful - thanks my friend, but this was just progress over a couple of days, and this pattern's repeated so many times over the years (well, not the morning drinking, but the urge to) so I can't read into anything into it, much as I'd like to (yet?).

Mike - I hear you buddy, and it's that exercising control towards the end of a session that can be so crucial, but the very nature of my drink problem is that it's so often out of control once I'm on that rollercoaster. Having said that, there may have been a glimmer (lovely word that!) where I was finishing my fifth beer last night, and it might have been the extra clarity that nal gives while drinking, but I did make a conscious decision not to have one more. So here's hoping!

I guess the other strand to what you wrote is that the anxiety is not all about the drinking for me. Often if I drink too much it is, of course, but I have anxiety attacks and panic attacks independently - as Virgil wrote it can be tied to a poor night's sleep, for example, and for me it can arise for no reason whatsoever. The doctors wouldn't give me a separate diagnosis of GAD or panic disorder or whatever while I was still drinking. It took four months without a drink but with continuing symptoms to finally convince them. It's a bugger, that's for sure!

Bear - I feel exactly the same. I don't really get cravings, just anxiety, and sometimes the urge just to wipe myself off to give my head a break from reality. And yes, many people don't understand, even some of my doctors just don't get it! Wow, your five hour ride sounds like an ordeal, but so glad you're ok now, and hope you had a really nice vacation

<edit> I'm tempted to change my username now to 'eight glimmers a week' - (all sing!) 'eight glimmers a week, are pretty fancy progress, but eight glimmers a week...are not enough to say I'm cured' ha! (And with apologies to the Beatles )