Week 18

Cravings , consumption are up and number off AF's down . I need to think about this and what it means or perhaps I shouldn't but wait awhile and see . Maybe it's just one of those week 18 things .
I've become ever so busy since they just took my cast off ( hep , hep , this is my independance day !

Easier said than done, but. . .I wouldn't overthink this. It seems to be a common denominator at around 4 months. Going through it myself, and it SUCKS.

Hang in there!

Week 19 : up on units down on AF's , not the best of times as :

Just smashing heavy triggers and grappling with doubts .
never doubted NAl curbs but get doubts about if extinction will happen .
Main doubt is one about NAl loosing its effect ....Saw someone on MWO state they'd used it for six months and it lost its effect . really cheered me up
But doubts are doubts its decisions that count and so i go on and intend to see for myself what'll happen it's the only way . there'll be plenty of time for Balcofen or AA
( perhaps not ! ) or stranglotherapy etc ...
Hell , this has to work !
Here comes Elf gasping and clutching his paunch

Hi Elfern - just seeing your struggles now.

Keep going (I know you are). Keep motivated. We don't know all of the details of John's story - maybe he was hitting a spike and called it quits? Maybe it worked differently for him, who knows? He's not you and vice versa. John's story is his own unique journey...not yours. No 2 people will react exactly the same to this medication, so unfortunately this leaves a lot of us wondering and spiking and losing heart at times.

I spiked. It is back to working for me. Concentrate on the success stories here only for now. Get through it by keeping your blinders on for the 'it's not working stories'. Look at Netty's thread for inspiration from a current success. Look at Q's and SR's and back at Marbella's threads. Just because their stories are a bit in the past now, does not make them irrelevant - good stuff there. Lots of doubts that turned around. Q's signature line (was just looking at it last night) is amazing. He was at 80-100 before hand and with struggle is now at 50% of where he used to be. Consistently. I'm sure he did not feel like that was amazing success going through it, but if you see it in black and white and take out the time factor - it's working. And that's amazing. I know from your stories, it's working for you as well, but perhaps your patterns are more ingrained and your habits are not as easy to extinguish. I am very aware that my drinking patterns are ideal for success (similar to what WTE just mentioned): daily drinking patterns at lower levels, no add'l medication, no major depression / anxiety (minor yes, but I can work through it). Take my timeline as cliff notes to your own progress. The more you drink, the longer your addiction has had time to take route, the more protracted your timeline will be. I also think daily drinking patterns help speed the process, so factor that in as well. Don't change, just keep it in mind.

You will be someone's inspiration soon, Elfern. You will come through and be helping others even more very soon, I just know it. Sorry for the long post, I've just read a few of your posts from the past week in one sitting and want nothing more than to cheer you on. I have a really good feeling about a few people on this board who are struggling a bit that I just know within my heart are almost there. You are one of them and I can't wait to read about when you turn the corner. Chin up & eyes open for the glimpses of change

Doubts are normal. Have a look at my progress log. About a month ago I was having major doubts about TSM method. I too wondered if extinction was really happening for me.

Extinction is occurring. Keep forging ahead. The gains will come.

Q

Hi WTE ,Happy and Q
Thanks alot , . Really glad to see those stunning figures for you both .
I see G4M has had a good turn . This I'm so happy to see .
Thanks for your encouragent and long post ( Happy , no need to apologize ! I'm spoiled and chuffed to read it ).
No, I'll be ok I've just done an AF which has broken a run of eight straight days of drinking as they straddled two weeks the figures won't fully reflect that . But I was
getting mightilly sick drinking like a bottle and half of wine a night and all that after
weeks 11 to 18 were really reasonable but that's ended by the AF and another today , not much craving so who knows we'll maybe on to better things now .
I'll keep you posted .

I love you people. I skim thru alot but I love you guys writing these incredibly long posts...makes me just feel very connected to the bigger picture.

Glad to participate in the successes & frustrations. Elfern - hang in there & here. Luv ya!

WEEK 20

Well , I really had a the feeling it was going to be a good one for alc , and was relatively good but frustrated by life's nasty turns . My daugter resorted to cutting
she's generally moved away from the distressing practice but it's still around I'm afraid to say . Of course this releases a big emotional charge among us in the family
and some turbulence . It's a time for responsabuility and presence and car driving ,waiting in the hospital etc make their demands . I used to have a couple of stiff ones and brace myself for a long evening, then when it was over I'd head for the balconey with the bottle for a good drink . It used to be a heavy white knuckler postponing strong urges . As a major trigger I felt its force this time but
less so . in fact I managed to grab a couple of glasses of wine with a kebab along the way and at the end had two more . No matter how worrying the whole episode
I was so happy to see that it didn't roll into a binge and hangover to boot .
When this happened I felt fairly srong on a third AF and evening had come , in fact I had the feeling that maybe I'd manage four or five AF's but just wanted to role on with it . Too bad I lost that but if I get a week with less heavies I feel I could manage it . That's where I'm back to now , I haven' drunk so far this week and that means today is AF no 4 , hope I do it . As i have virtually no cravings I can probably conclude that it's bigger triggers or the "love" of a drink now and again that will lead me to drink . Then again perhaps best to make no conclusions we'll just have to live it out . That's what we're all seeing .
But this is working , i'm so pleased to see the likes of Bob, Q, Happy ,G4 and now Virgil too stepping on the good foot .
Stick with it everyone , tsm is such good news .

Elf - so upsetting to hear about your daughter. My heart goes out to you. I have read that Nal helps cutting as well, ironically... I hope she finds peace within herself and stops hurting.

With all that is going on I think you have done marvelously this week. Very well done. I hope you get your 4th AF tonight...push it a little bit if the cravings come on because I think it would be a huge treat in your life if you did it, and sounds like you need one !

Yes, it's working. It's working for many of us now, you included. So exciting and I'm almost ready to relax and really believe this is it.

Take care and wishing you the best

Hi Elfern,

Just wanted to say I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter, but I'm so impressed with how well you've handled it. You're an inspiration!