Thanks - I keep holding onto the 'magic' 4th month but was also hoping to see or feel other changes before then. Just like a 'hey, this is Nal talking and I'm doing my job'

Reading through all the posts is so helpful and clearly, I'm not experiencing anything unique but it is still good to have feedback..

thanks

Hi Virginia,
You appear to be at the point where the honeymoon passes. At least for me it was pretty prolonged. It does not matter. Let the process work.

The fact that you may see an uptick in your drinking IS NOT NEGATIVE. You are uncovering triggers. As the superficial ones are extinguished, the most beastly ones surface. So many are disappointed when they have a high volume day. But what they should really be saying is, "last night I discovered a kick-ass trigger and attacked it with a vengeance." Makes this process a whole hell of a lot more fun. For more clarification, read my last post in my weekly.

You doing great. I also recommend you forget about your “final goal”. Let the method determine it for you. When you get there, you will be a different person and what you decide now will be moot.

-sr

Thanks sr, I read your other post and it really made sense.

Yesterday, I had a lot of family and friends over for a day-time party. Did not have 1 drink or even think about it. That has never happened at a family event before, usually I start drinking slowly and by the end, have clearly had too much and struggle to fake some semblance of control. But as people were leaving, I started totally craving a glass of wine and wanted to drink it FAST (took Nal in the morning). So once the last group left, I had a drink, then a 2nd, then 2 people called back to back that ALWAYS make me want a drink, so on to my 3rd and 4th drink. Then, took a small break, got kids to bed, and onto my 5th drink, made a 6th one but got bored with and tossed it in the sink. The point is that if I can feel hopeful that the trigger provided by the phone calls is extinguished... then that would take care of a lot of my drinking. They call a lot haha... my husband said this morning that it's clear that the medication isn't strong enough to overcome these people.. luckily he understands that it's not a quick process..

Hope I understood your point correctly...

Week 3 update

Total drinks 29, 1 AF, cravings all greater than 5.

The main difference I'm seeing now is that even when I drink to my pre-TSM amounts, I feel more sober, if possible. Can remember falling asleep rather than passing out in front of the tv. Last night, I cooked a favorite meal to have with wine and totally lost interest in both yet made myself eat and drink - why, I don't know.. I've also lost the desire to sneak one more shot before heading upstairs for the night. Almost didn't even notice that detail. Still haven't lost the desire to refresh my 1 vodka tonic before switching to wine though.

It also helps that the 1st drink is usually at 6 (pre-TSM) but now I can't get to the Nal until after 5:30.. guess I could carry it with me but it doesn't seem important earlier in the day.

As for week 4, I'll be traveling and will not want to drink too much so if the units are reduced, it won't be a real picture of results. Then again, the units may be the same but over a longer time span, all day vs. 6 pm on..

Having more time for reflection - would so wish that I discovered this years ago, really believe it could have helped some family members.

Week 4 & part of week 5

Traveled on week 4 and due to situations, had low cravings, and no more than 2 drinks per meal / hang out period. Usually this would translate to 2 in the afternoon and 2 in the evening. I felt really in control but was also out of any comfort zone so I was careful to not drink too much. Unfortunately, this gave me the feeling that I did have some control, that the Nal was working, and I was on my way to better things.

Whomp!! Allowed myself to drink a little more when I got home and really overdid it last night - back to sneaking drinks and everything. It was like I had never started the Nal. Very humbling and depressing. I am striving for AF days today and tomorrow, just because I think my body really needs some recovery time. And it will be a test of self-control but oh well...

I know that 4 - 6 months is nothing in the grand scheme of things but damn.... my hopes were sky high when I was 'controlling' the drinking. Nope, the drinking is still controlling me..

Hi Virginia...it is frustrating!

When I was going through the 'womp' stage...I just told myself I was extinguishing a new trigger or working overtime on an extra tough spot in my super-highway of addiction. It helped me get through it to think that what I thought of before as a slip was actually just the medication working on my problem.

The good news is you are already seeing good progress - you will get there!

Kind of joking but how freakin' long does it take to extinguish a trigger???? My main, or most frequent one, is simply cooking a nice dinner. The next most frequent one is talking to certain family members.

Well, I guess since I've been in the habit of cooking and drinking for 10 years, it will take quite awhile for that trigger to go away. Maybe I should stop cooking

Virginia,,,funny but when I was sober for 13 years I actually lost my interest in cooking for that very reason!Always cooked with a glass of wine in my hand so for all those years I cooked very simply. I must add however I did not mind that at all.

Sober 13 YEARS???? You've probably addressed this in other posts but what made you start drinking after that?

5 week update - 34 drinks, 1 AF (hungover)

Felt absolutely no effect of NAL, super high cravings and drinking too much in short time periods.

Going into weeks 6 and 7 will be interesting. Having a house guest that I don't want to drink too much in front of... then we'll be traveling to see family - lots of triggers - so I'm expecting to have a few light drinking or AF days, then a blowout. Of course, planning invites the worst... Vodka is running low so I'll try to avoid replacing it until the trip is done. This will be a week or 2 when I will try to use willpower and distractions.

Hi Virginia,

I was sober for over 11 years, and I cant give you a good reason I tossed that out the window. It was more trivial than anything. During those 11 years, much of my decision making regarding social and business settings was affected by fear...fear of AL.

My wife stayed sober with me for much of that time, however, she didnt have the problem that I had. But...she started drinking again, occasionally, she tried to hide that from me for fear that I may start back up again....when I did find out, it blew me away. Unfortunately, one night at my own home, for a party for friend, I decided to pick up a beer. I drank 3. I remember the feeling too...it was like riding a bike. "Hi old friend...I can't say that I missed you much really...hey you haven't changed a bit!" Anyway it was all downhill from there. Almost 2 years of binge drinking since then. Could I go sober on my own again? I cant picture it. Maybe I could with alot of will power and effort. I went 3 months of white knuckles during that time, but I would think of drinking all the time. I was living off of fear from my last bad episode.

So my hopes and dreams are for TSM is to get rid of my addiction, be normal, and ultimately be able to "choose" to drink if want to.

They say things happen for a reason, ill choose to believe I started drinking again in order to find SM and drink my addiciton to extinction, at which point my life will probably be alot better for all involved.

hapful