Do you take the pill everyday knowing that you will drink? Or are you taking the pill as an actual craving hits? Can you put a number on your desire/cravings? Is it a 10 (where you are climbing the walls, having withdrawals, etc.) or a 1 (wanting a drink is a flitting thought)?

Hi Jaba, Thanks for the help. I do take the pill everyday, anticipating I will have at least one drink at night, at some point. I don't know that I really ever have cravings, so to speak, so I would put it on an overall average of '1'. Like if I'm at work, I'm not thinking about drinking, or hitting the oilrig, when I get home, or in the hour before I anticipate being home. When I do get home, I usually settle in, and have a beer, or a glass of wine right away though. I get home from work usually around 6-8 every night, but the weekends, so I don't have any guilt in having that drink, with it being late, and with me having a long day in an office. Sometimes after some stressful PvP video games (LOL) I will be careless, and just pour another glass without thinking or counting it. I'll also mention that I buy boxed, Franzia cabernet, to drink; not to have an abundance of wine, but because it lasts my girlfriend and I about a week or a week and a half, and I am on an extremely tight budget; I just bought my first house, and have payments, and have lots of other bills, including medical ones, that are accumulating, so I have a set budget in place for alcohol on a monthly basis, as well as anything else I spend money on. My thoughts with buying the box is, it's $20 bucks and it's usually 5 bottles of wine a box; if we are each to have 3 glasses in a night, 6 total, it's about a bottle and a half of wine, so over a week, at 4-6 drinks a night split between us (she will not drink for days at a time though, sometimes, like if she is sick or something) I was under the personal impression that I was doing well with it.

How are your AF days? Do you struggle with them? Are you able to have more than one day at a time? What was your longest stretch of AF days? How do you feel during/after your AF days? Do you find your intake increases after a stretch of AF days?

I'm guessing AF is 'Alcohol Free' days? I haven't had one in a minute, probably about a month, and it was probably for a day or two max. I feel fine on them, though. It's just annoying trying to relax and get to sleep at night.

Do you think you maybe drinking more out of habit? Or could it be subconsciouly because of a trauma?

I think my drinking started as a result of trauma, undoubtedly; I had terrible, terrible social anxiety in high school and college. I didn't drink at all in high school, well very, very rarely, like once every two or three months, but I did isolate myself and smoked a hell of a lot of weed for a 16 year old. I have a strange, t

*MJ does help with cravings and I have seen posts where people were using TSM and MJ and still have gotten "cured". I do not believe it will hamper your progress; however, I am not a AUD doctor or counselor. If it works for you that is all that matters (I do wish it was illegal in my state).

*I am on Wellbutrin and Adrenal and I do not think that it hinder my progress in TSM; however, everyone is different.
I just started taking Wellbutrin strictly, and upped my dose. I preach to the stars about it. It's risen me out of a seasonal depression that I have had for the past 5 years, and it's even helped me with some of the 'brain chatter' associated with ADD tendencies.

*Benzos will hinder your progress (which I am sure you know).

Thank you; I take .25 milligrams about twice a week. I don't know the science behind this hindering progress in TSM though. Could you possibly refer me to a link?

*Seroquil is a drug I have not taken, but I have had friends that went on it. I do not know how it would effect TSM, but it is a drug I would use as a last resort for sleep. I would have very vivid nightmares with the nal, so my heart goes out to you.

Thank you for the empathy, I had so many vivid nightmares in the past couple of weeks. It has made some of my days more depressing than other's, trying to get the images out of my head...

There are other meds out there that are used off label for sleep, and Seroquil is one that (IMO) messes with your brain as well as your body. It sounds like you are not having a good experience with it, maybe ask your doctor for something else. Some have had a great experience with Gabapentin and it is, for what I have read, used in AUD therapy (just a suggestion). Here is a website with a list of off label use drugs for sleep http://cnsdiseases.com/current-therapies-for-insomnia (I hope it works). We need to be advocates in our on health, and we need to find what works for us.

Thank you. I contacted my Dr and got Trazadone called in today. Hopefully I sleep great tonight!

Remember everyone is different and this is a very personal experience.

Jaba

P.S. Sorry for rambling, for I do that when I am tired.[/quote]

No problem. I do it when I'm awake. Thanks for all the insight.

Doc -

Welcome back and thanks for all the info! Hope you get the pressure sorted out soon, that sounds really unpleasant.

I'll be interested to hear how it goes with the Trazodone, what I (initially) see on the web says it decreases the amount of time in REM sleep and increases time in slow wave sleep, so it sounds like it might be just the ticket for you, plus it might alleviate the worry about getting sleep so you get rid of some drinking right there. Is it a different dosage from what you took when you were younger?

Very cool story about Dr. Eskapa, wasn't expecting that at all, thanks for telling us!

I just saw your reply to Jaba. If you're paying out of pocket for any of your prescriptions, check out GoodRx.com. They offer an electronic "coupon" that can get you a discount at your local pharmacy. 30 Nal for about $40, for instance.

I was looking over some info for a friend that got stuck with a big detox bill, one website said you should shop the local hospitals for procedures, if your hospital is higher than others they may cut the bill down if you complain. If you go in for days, you might also ask for an audit on the charges.

Keep posting, even just short ones if you don't have a lot of time, we like to hear how you're doing.

Hey Joe,

Thanks for commenting! And thank you for the support!

I hope to find a remedy for this pressure as well; it is, indeed, very, very unpleasant. Not knowing that it's for sure nothing to do with my heart, makes it a lot worse...

I will take the Trazadone tonight for the first time. I will let you know how it goes tomorrow, if I can remember to get on, which I really will try to do; this is caring community I would like to become involved with. I am not sure the dosage that they have called in for me (they being my Dr. and his receptionist). The receptionist jus texted me saying he did, and then I received a text from my pharmacy saying it's ready, so I'll be grabbing it after work, this evening.

Glad you liked that story. I'm happy to share! It was actually about Dr. Sinclair though! I would love to speak to Dr. Eskapa, but, to be totally honest, I was completely honored to speak to the guy who came up with this unique treatment methodology, to begin with . The guy was as humble as they come. When my Dr. told me that he passed, I spent our whole session lightly crying, letting my Dr. share stories about him. I only knew the guy, personally, for 15 minutes of my life, from a transcontinental phone call, but our small talk will stay with me forever.

Thanks for the suggestion with coupons for meds. My scripts are very very affordable at the time, with my current company insurance policy, but I may need that in the future, so thank you very much.

And thanks for the suggestion on my med bills. I will definitely look into that.

I'll try to stay active on the forum. Thanks for the support and suggestions.

Take care.

Arrgh! I meant Dr. Sinclair, but my fingers were on autopilot and typed Eskapa instead!

Yes, what a great gift to have been able to talk with him, to actually have him look over your case, wow! I'm so glad we have had Dr. E to carry on his work.

Haha, it happens.

I couldn't agree more about Dr. Eskapa. TSM could've gotten lost, or never recognized as fully without him, and his book.

Hi Dr Gonzo
Great story about Dr Sinclair and war in the Middle East- what a mighty brain!
You sound like you've got a pretty mighty brain yourself too- There sounds like there's a lot going on in there! The pressure you experience in your chest sounds like a worry. I just wonder with all your drugs of choice whether going to a counsellor about the 'whys' might help. The cannabis really sparked my interest because as a result of me cutting down alcohol using TSM I have seen a lot of things more clearly these past few months. I have actually persuaded my partner to give up his cannabis habit as it was driving me crazy. He was always tense when he didn't have it and always out of it when he did have it and therefore unavailable to me.

With the help of counselling I was able to see that I deserve a loving supportive partner and a chance at a happy life (had a few childhood issues). Drinking had always been a way to dull the problems but of course it then just leads to more problems- it's a depressant after all.

I sometime think I have a very addictive anxious obsessive personality type and I have got a bit obsessed with TSM and addiction and childhood issues. I think its all linked. I think my partner has used cannabis to escape dealing with feelings too. He tells me he had a happy childhood but his younger sister was recently barred from seeing her child due to addiction issues. How does so much addiction happen in a happy family? She wont get her child back now- it is very sad. From my reading and experience of life people generally have problems with substances when they haven't felt loved and safe as a kid.

How does your girlfriend feel about your smoking dope? Does she smoke too? My trouble has been that I like the odd smoke as well, especially after drinking so couldn't very well tell my partner to stop when I was having some. Since I've cut back on drinking I haven't smoked pot so have been able to tell my partner that I just couldn't live with the dope anymore. I have been able to be more assertive.

I know this is a forum for TSM but I just felt compelled to write to you about the cannabis particularly as everything else has been pretty well covered.

Take care

MD

DrG0nz0,

I am so happy you are among the living.

I had a house that needed to be gutted and lived in it with three kids as the construction was going on. You know its bad when your 3 year old say no kitchen still, I want real food take me over grandmas! I can laugh at it now, but living through it was a reason to drink (and I didn't drink then...go figure).

I think it was Dr. Eskapa that posted on here that they were finding that benzos were hindering some peoples progress; I am not exactly sure, but I will look back on the posts.

Your medical issues have to be frighten. I cannot believe they haven't done and EKG (a very cheap test) or an ECHO on you. My guess is that they are thinking you are young and healthy, so it has to be something else. Did they check your diaphragm?

Out of curiosity when do these attacks/pressure in your chest happen? Is it after a night of drinking?

The only reason that I am asking is because I would have those feelings (along with other symptoms) after a night of drinking too much. It was one of my many symptoms of my nal overs. The first time I had one I thought I was going to die and should go to the E.R., but I knew it was the alcohol. I was a lucky one that very rarely suffered a hangover until I start TSM, and now I can get a nal over by drinking more than 2 glasses of wine...lucky me.

Please make sure that the mix of the Seroquil and Trazadone are okay, for I think the Seroquil is still in your system. Since you had such an awful experience with the Trazadone, maybe start with 1/2 of dose (remember I am not a medical professional). Most people that take it for sleep are at a much lower dose than used for antidepressant. The effects should wear off by morning. You are no longer a child (I hope you weigh a lot more), so things should be different. I did some research on it (my doc wanted to put me on it) and decided against it (didn't want to add another AD to the mix), but the people that reviewed Trazadone said there wasn't that groggy feeling in the morning, and couldn't live without it.

Hopefully the Trazadone works for you and sleep will come without nightmares. Maybe after a week of good sleep try to have an AF day to see how you feel (just a suggestion).

It sounds like beside the habit of drinking, you are drinking through the nal and getting drunk. That doesn't stop your progress (not taking the nal and drinking can) but it isn't helping you.

It sounds like you might be using alcohol as a crutch right now. If you are, will you be able to stand without it?

The only reason why I am asking is because the nal it a tool to help you get to the other side, but you have to help the nal.

So some suggestions (or other tools for your tool box):

Slow down you drinking; take sip instead of gulps; drink gulps water in between sip of alcohol (hold that water in your hand instead of the alcohol); listen to your brain, for things are not the same.

If you have time, start a progress page here and post your intake and how you feel while you were drinking, or why you got drunk, or that you just finished a project on your house...we will help you try to figure out what or why your progress has stalled/lulled, or just encourage you when you need it.

I see three things going on with you:

1) you are having medical issues that are not being diagnosed that are adding to your stress and drinking alcohol without the nal is appearing to be helping that medical issue;

2) since you are not taking the nal every time it could be causing an increase of your intake and you may have to start over

3) you are sleep deprived that adds to both situations and you are finding comfort/sleep from alcohol

There isn't anything wrong with having urges once in a while, or over doing it (as long as you do not drive), for that is a normal drinker. Some even drink a glass of wine or two a night every night, and that isn't an issue. It becomes an issue when you cannot stop drinking after one drink (everyday/night), cannot stop drinking a night for medical tests in the morning, driving drunk, etc. These are the red flags that we had before TSM.

Hopefully after a good week of sleep you will feel differently about alcohol, and maybe that pressure will disappear (we can hope). Not having a good nights sleep can cause a lot of different issues. Also, following that golden rule and some mindful drinking could change your fame of mind.

The main thing is you didn't give up, you were seeing progress before, and you should start seeing progress in the future!

Keep us posted on your sleep (Sorry getting late will post more when I think of it).

Jaba

Hi there - just a swift post but I was wondering (like Jaba) why your GP does do not do an EKG - even young folk can have heart issues - NOT that I am saying it is, but it would seem to me to be an easy test to have and thus rule out any heart issues! The other thing that I wondered, was maybe they are anxiety attacks? I have never had one but have heard that they can be along the lines of what you are experiencing - and as it goes away with drinking, it is when you relax? Just a thought anyway. I also hated to see that you are sometimes drinking without taking the Nal - it will hinder your progress with you doing that. PLEASE take it every time, at least an hour before drinking. I liken it to a toddler in line at the checkout wanting candies - if you always say no (i.e. always take the Nal) eventually the child will stop pestering. (Extinction sets in) but give in one time - and the child knows that it can eventually get sweets if it pesters enough - the child will just keep pestering until you give in. When you take the Nal you are blocking the pathway - when you drink without the Nal you are allowing the brain to remember those good feelings along the pathway again! Our brains are so smart!

I enjoy reading your posts and loved hearing about your meeting with Dr Sinclair - he sounded like a wonderful man. And as Moderatedrinker said, what a brain - to go AWOL and come back with a dissertation on ending the wars in the Middle East. How lovely for you that you were able to meet him.

Hope the Trazadone went well for you - please post and let us know. I started taking Gabapentin (the RX variety) a few months ago and find it really helps with my sleep - I take it about 1 1/2 hours before I want to go to sleep and then sleep so well - and do not wake up feeling groggy.

Hugs, Maggie

Lest anyone need a resource for Dr. Eskapa and the benzos:

http://www.thesinclairmethod.net/community/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=4700&start=10&sid=56ca121d963adde39cb7721df1a19052

"The benzodiazepines will not help you with the Sinclair Method - they will hamper, slow, and weaken your de-addiction or extinction progress. Avoid them if at all possible. There is both scientific research to support this and also clinical cases ...."

DrG0nz0,

I found a couple of Dr. Eskapas posts that may be helpful:

viewtopic.php?f=15&t=2777&p=39903&sid=0da8498f2cfb720c7c4403b6c5edc48f#p39903

viewtopic.php?f=15&t=481&p=5500&sid=0da8498f2cfb720c7c4403b6c5edc48f#p5500

viewtopic.php?f=15&t=78&p=477&sid=0da8498f2cfb720c7c4403b6c5edc48f#p477

viewtopic.php?f=6&t=101&start=10

viewtopic.php?f=6&t=101&start=10

It seems that benzos are hitting the Gaba receptors (as alcohol does) and it will make the brain lazy (as alcohol does).

Here is a link explaining what benzos do to the brain:

http://thebrain.mcgill.ca/flash/i/i_03/ ... pines.html

Hopefully these links work,

Jaba