I can only speak for myself based on my experience so I am very bias towards the sucess of TSM. In my experience it was the easiest thing I ever had to do. I said before in my own recovery trhead, I was not a fast responder I was an instant responder. Within a few days I was down to an average of 3 per night. So ok I'm a lucky one and as such I don't think I quite understand the plight of those struggling because it was so easy for me.

As complex humans we are going to all have different experiences with it. I think of TSM as a treatment for a physical ailment. That is that it makes physical changes in the brain. We still have this social and psychological aspect of our being to contend with. I think one of the reasons why I don't have the psycological barriers is becasue when I think back to when I was drinking heavily I never really enjoyed it. In fact I would often look in the mirror while in the throws of a pretty good night of drinking and ask myself, 'are you enjoying this?' and the answer was always no. But I had no choice but to continue to drink till I passed out otherwise I would be come physically ill.

The only reason why I drank was because if I didn't then I would become physically ill which includes stomach cramps, irregular heartbeat, severe anxiety, headache and so on. I could on occasion punch through that barrier and get sober for a month or more at a time and that is when the psychological factors would kick in and get me to drink again.

I still have those psychological factors. I come home from a hard day work I deserve a drink, I race my bike with the team over the weekend and the comradeship at the bar is part of it, and then of course I have a bad day I NEED a drink and so on. But the Naltrexone has completely squashed the desire to chase the rush and so far that's been good enough for me.

I'm not cured by any means, I still drink almost every night but I no longer hide drinks, no need to, I no longer go to pour a glass of wine and slug the bottle while no one is looking and so on. As such I never feel the physical punishing pain that makes me reach for my medicine more and more and more and now I feel like I can drink like a normal person.

Anyway I'm babbling. Like I said I can only speak from my own experience and in doing so hope that it may help. That's about all we can do.

Ives it seems like you have a good plan going and I hope it works. I know what you mean by the physical niceties of still drinking on Naltrexone. I wonder if perhaps in our brains we confuse the two of them and sort of exchange one, the rush, for the other, calm relaxation, over time and start a relapse. Drinking is still pleasant and after our 20 - 30 years training to be alcoholics once Naltrexone takes the root cause away perhaps our brains are so shocked that they struggle to find a meaning in it and then assign priority values to anything else that the alcohol does for us and then we chase that?

I don't know.

My guess is that this is where mindfulness may step in.

Did OK in week 2, better than the last two by a little bit although there were a couple of bad hangover days. Average daily intake slowly going down. There is definitely something to the suggestion to drink the first one slowly and try to listen to what your brain is telling you. And not keeping strong alcohol on hand. My old pattern was to have a beer and ~3 shots within the first hour of getting home from work, then drink steadily until bedtime. Now I am sipping one beer per hour. And I don't generally feel a strong need to drink faster than that. On weeknights I can see this leading to 4 or 5 per night being much more common and much less difficult in the near future.

Another helpful thing is that I'm taking a melatonin and 600 mg gabapentin an hour before I need to be in bed, and when the sleepy wave hits, that is what pushes me to pour a glass of water and go to bed, as opposed to reaching a high enough BAC to make me feel like I can pass out easily, which has been my bedtime strategy up until now.

Week 0 (09/23-09/29): 60 (8.3/day)
Week 1 (09/30-10/06): 56 (8.0/day)
Week 2 (10/07-10/13): 53 (7.6/day)
Week 3 (10/14-10/20): 6 - in progress

what is this "fear" you speak of?

Ives,

It sounds like you are getting a good grip on what is working for you. I know that some say drink like you normally do and what you normally do, but sometimes it doesn't work for everyone. I know that Generic said he started drinking Miller 64 which it has 64 calories and 2.8% abv and it was tough getting drunk on that (also it doesn't taste that great).

I do have a question about Gabapentin is this something that you ordered over the internet or is it a script? I have read it can help with abstinence and heavy drinking, does it help with your sleep? And how are the side effects?

I am glad you are making good progress,

Jaba

I have a prescription from my psychiatrist. It does help a lot with sleep. The side effects are pretty minimal, but once I get my drinking under control, I am hoping I won't have to take it very often because I would rather not deal with any side effects.

The last week was very good drinking-wise, only one really bad hangover, and yesterday I actually had just four drinks, which is the first time I've had less than five in several months. Weekly alcohol intake continues to decline. No AF days yet.

Week 0 (09/23-09/29): 60 (8.3/day)
Week 1 (09/30-10/06): 56 (8.0/day)
Week 2 (10/07-10/13): 53 (7.6/day)
Week 3 (10/14-10/20): 45 (6.4/day)
Week 4 (10/21-10/27): in progress

Ives, you are heading in the right direction! That is great!

Here's a graph. Looks pretty good.

Yup. Downward trend looks pretty good to me too

Ives,

That graph looks wonderful! I am so happy for and your progress!

Keep up the good work and keep posting,

Jaba

Well, I won't be setting any new low numbers this week. I broke up with my girlfriend of two years. We tried to make it work way longer than we really should have, and I finally decided to pull the plug two days ago. Alcohol was the third member of our relationship and as I found myself distancing my own attitudes and priorities away from drinking, I also found that I couldn't see a future for me and her without alcohol being there to hold it together. There have been some heavy drinking days in the lead-up to and aftermath of this. Moving forward I am confident that this was the right decision, and being freed from the stress of being in a negative relationship is going to help me continue to make progress even faster.

It was a major shock for the first day, but now I am starting to feel better and better. I think I need a little while without being in a relationship. But I am also finding myself feeling very excited about the future in terms of finding someone who is better for me, and who I can be better for. Ideally, someone who doesn't drink very much. I am not going to get better by continuing to surround myself with people who live an alcohol-centric lifestyle.

Week 0 (09/23-09/29): 60 (8.3/day)
Week 1 (09/30-10/06): 56 (8.0/day)
Week 2 (10/07-10/13): 53 (7.6/day)
Week 3 (10/14-10/20): 45 (6.4/day)
Week 4 (10/21-10/27): 6, 10, 8, 10, 10 (8.8/day) - in progress