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Jaba, I am sorry that you didn't get the reinforcement from your husband that would have pumped you up a bit. I wonder if he is scared to get too excited. Plus, you have to remember what has been drummed into our heads forever; the only path for an alcoholic is abstinence. He sees you taking an uncharted path. Did your husband read the book? Maybe if he understood a little of the science behind it he might feel more comfortable. There are times I feel very dishonest by not sharing this with my husband, but then I think about how dishonest I have been by sneaking alcohol for so long, and this feels better. I know I would get angry with his "helping" and it would not be good for our relationship or my progress.

Hopefully you can get all the cheerleading you need right here from us!

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Jaba: it is hard to say what is right in terms of telling or not telling. I don't have my husband's hopes up, but then again if I had told him I wouldn't be in a situation like last night where I offered him my second glass of wine and he said "no, I want a beer". He would have known how to help me.

We are all doing the best that we can, so are our SOs. xoxo Newlife

I got my pills from River and they are not marked. When I split them into corners I have to use a very razor sharp pill cutter because they are almost powdery.

Newlife, I felt sad when I read that your husband didn't drink the other wine. He probably just wasn't thinking. He didn't need to know about TSM to know that that was the right thing to do.

I totaled my drinks for week 15. 21 units with one A/F day. I still feel that the changes I see in my drinking are because I am drinking more mindfully. I still want to continue drinking, the craving is still there, I just resist it.

Although I have just received six months worth of naltrexone, I think that I am going to stop TSM. I despise the way I feel on naltrexone. I have tried to have a positive attitude and focus on the good change that has come about, but I do not like the person I have become. I am flat, with no spark. Honestly, I think I preferred waking up with a hangover most days than having no zest for life at all. I use to be the person who engaged with strangers while out, giving them a big smile and making them laugh or smile. I have no energy for that any more. My daughter asked me if I was ok because I don't seem to have any "oomph". I feel anxious and scared a lot. I am having difficulty getting motivated to do the most menial things. I sleep more than I did before and sometimes take a nap during the day, and I have never been a napper. I have been avoiding spending time with friends because it feels like too much of an effort. I feel tired all the time.

Maybe I am just having a bad week, it is the change of seasons, the weather, or something else. I watched the movie, One Little Pill this morning and came away feeling what I always feel, other people get something different from the pill than I do. They drink and then don't feel like continuing to drink. I only stop because I talk myself into stopping and have all these little tricks to delay drinking and slow it down. I said I was going to reread the book and I have been. Maybe I will find some answer there as to why I feel the way I do.

Your support has been wonderful and is what has gotten me to this point. Hopefully the changes I have made over the last 15 weeks will stick without the pill.

Dee

Dee
Might I suggest instead an experiment with Low Dose Nal rather than quitting? Just maybe for a week? PM me if you like.
Steve.

Dee - I am so sorry that you are stopping the Nal - but isn't it worth keeping up with it now that you have come this far? It seems such a shame to waste what progress you have made - after all, your intake is half of that pre-Nal!! Please think long and hard - remember why you started it in the first place - and also try and have some AF days and let your system be Nal free for a day or two each week ..... think about it please ?

Oh - I tried to post this and saw that Steve has also posted so it would not let me post - I agree with Steve - at least try it - PM him and he can explain it to you......

Hugs, Maggie x

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