You may have read Dr. Sinclair's response to SpringerRider, by way of Dr. Eskapa, to SR's question. Springer asked, paraphrased, whether it is helpful to intensify craving by creating alcohol deprivation effect and then drinking to extinguish that. Here's part of Sinclair's response:

Quote:

Now to your question of whether you should intentionally deprive yourself of alcohol. The way you are doing it sounds good. It is a good idea to extinguish all of the various forms of drinking you had learned to do. You should drink alcohol (with naltrexone) in the same locations where you previously learned to drink, with the same people, and with the same moods.

I read the response to be not simply that we all should "starve" ourselves a few days, then drink through it; I read Sinclair as saying that we should identify our own triggers and drink through them to promote extinction. We used to talk about this in the early days at MWO, and I feel a bit sorry we have neglected it here.

The Sinclair Method is not suitable for several weeks' inpatient treatment in large part because the patients would be drinking through very few real-world triggers. Eskapa does not devote a great deal of attention to it in the book, but this is what he means when he says to drink as you normally do. It's not so much about the amount as it is the trigger.

For binge drinkers, alcohol deprivation must be a powerful trigger. For many of us, having not had an alcohol-free day since God knows when, we are strangers to deprivation so it's not a trigger. I suspect I'm like many daily drinkers in that I have many mild triggers through the day. Five o'clock? Trigger. Five o'clock somewhere? Trigger. Surprise phone call from old friend? Must grab a glass of wine. Surprise phone call from irate ex-husband? Trigger. Favorite tv show? Trigger. Beer ad on tv? Trigger (although I'm a wine drinker). Deadline approaching? Trigger. Project complete? Major trigger. Golf on a beautiful day? Four-Star Trigger. You get the idea.

If we avoid these triggers rather than drink through them as we normally do, we miss opportunities for extinction. So maybe you binge drinkers are lucky in a way; you actually can ramp up a powerful trigger by "teasing" (as SR would say) and heightening the extinction effect. From what Dr. Sinclair said, I'm not clear this would work for us daily drinkers who haven't learned that as a trigger.

And you bingers thought we daily drinkers had all the luck!

Great post Lena. I read Sinclair's response the same way: that the deprivation effect is just one of many triggers we will need to extinguish, especially if you are (like me) a binger and waiting has become a trigger for you. For 25 years FRIDAY was my trigger. I drink on Fridays no matter what! Started in high school, continued in college, then while working, then law school, then while working again. In fact, in the past 15 years or so, Friday became too long to wait and I started drinking on Thursdays. (Not a coincidence that my alcoholic bartender friend has worked Thursday nights for the past 15 years and gives me free candy... Oops, I mean free drinks, every Thursday night.) I am going to "tease" myself this Thursday and Friday and NOT drink in hopes of extinguishing that HUGE trigger for me. I'll keep "teasing" myself and see what happens. Fantastic observations SR and fantastic synopsis/amplification Lena. By the way, Lena, hilarious triggers. Here are some for me: I'm HAPPY -- trigger. I'm SAD -- trigger. I'm pissed off -- trigger. I'm lonely -- trigger. Pretty woman -- trigger. Nondescript woman -- trigger. Unattractive woman -- trigger... You get the picture!

Minneapolisnick and other binge drinkers,
It is so interesting to me that there are two pretty distinct type of drinkers. Those of us who drink daily like me and the binge drinkers. I am curious what it is like during the week when you are not drinking? I know you have triggers, but it seems like you are able to hold off till the weekend or whenever your drinking goes on. For me, I can only hold out till I get home from work each night, and it is such a ritual part of my day. Now, I don't think about it until evening, but then, wham! when it is 6pm, It's Time!! So, during the whole week, do you just not think about drinking? Or, do you think about it, but it is not overwhelming to the point that you have to drink? I am just interested in what each of us goes through. It is so hard for me to imagine going until the weekend to drink.

Hi Calikime - I'm daily as well...I have an easier time now having AF nights, but I still feel like I'm missing my treat if I do AF.

That is a great question for the bingers: do you feel like you are just storing up for your treat until a set drinking day or it's just not an issue on certain days of the week?

Nick - you poor man. Hopefully "invisible" women aren't a trigger...this board has a lot of ladies on the other end of the keyboard .

Am sure it's only a matter of time before these "invisible TSM ladies = TRIGGER". hehehehe

A great question about cravings. The fact that I was able to go several days AF every week tricked me for years into thinking that I was not the A-word. But, when I tried to quit for various reasons I could NEVER do it for more than a month. Years ago, probably in the mid-90s, I didn't think much about drinking during the weekdays. And back then I certainly didn't think I had a drinking problem. It was when my drinking expanded to include several weekdays of moderate drinking, plus binge weekends, that I started to think I had a problem. And once I became aware that I might have a problem, I started telling everyone, "I could never become an alcoholic because then I'll have to quit drinking." So, for me, about ten years ago I started making a conscious effort to not drink during the weekdays. Sunday was easy -- that is the hangover day where I say to myself, "I'm done drinking, this sucks." As my consumption increased over the years, the hangovers crept into Mondays and I'd be thinking the same thing: "This sucks, I'm done drinking." On neither of these two days did I have any interest in drinking. On Tuesday, with the hangover gone, I'd start to think, "Hey, I feel pretty good, I could go for a drink." Then I'd tell myself, "You can't drink on Tuesdays or you'll become an alcoholic and you'll have to quit." Same for Wednesday. On both days I typically thought about drinking and as the years passed, I thought about it more and more but was usually able to suppress the urge to drink. Thursday I was REALLY ready to roll. And about ten or fifteen years ago, I pushed my weekend drinking to include Thursday nights. I would then drink as much as I wanted, Thursday nights through Saturday nights, thinking, "So long as I can go three or four AF days, my health will not be ruined and I am not an alkie. How many alkies don't drink four days a week?" But you know how it goes, it's progressive, this thing we have. And my drinking increased during those Thursdays through Saturdays. As the years went on, my tolerance went through the roof. As an example, when I got my DWI two years ago, I was with my sober GF who offered to drive before we got stopped. I told her no, I was fine because I thought I was. She thought I was too because she is not the slightest bit shy about taking away the keys if I'm acting drunk. And I had driven like that literally hundreds of times before. And when the Po-Po (police) pulled me over, guess what I blew? .18! So for me, .18 was fine for driving and I did it for years! I can only imagine what my reading was when I considered myself drunk! I was not slurring my words and passed the field sobriety test at .18. (Could not escape that pesky breathalizer though and no, the cop could not care less that I'm an attorney.) So, long story short, no cravings on Sunday and Monday. Cravings kick in on Tuesday and Wednesday but I can usually suppress them until Thursday, knowing that the party starts that night. One thing I've learned on this board is that TRIGGERS are KEY. Your trigger is 6 PM -- that's what you do to mellow out after a long day. My TRIGGER for twenty years was Friday night, only to melt into Thursdays as my consumption increased.

This is an interesting topic. I have been so concerned about not having AF days. . .but since I'm drinking through those daily triggers, it seems that need not be such a concern. For some reason, my daily triggers are currently stronger than they were at the start of this process. Every day around 1 p.m. I get a huge craving. So I take my naltrexone, eat lunch (tho it's usually nominal), get busy for an hour - and pour a glass of wine.

And Lena, your post was awesome. We share almost the exact same triggers. One of my strongest ones is when someone makes me feel insecure, or rejected. Bingo! I'm off to the races. . . The last week I had an incident like that, and though my drinking didn't spike as it would have in the past, I experienced very strong episodes of depression. I suspect that this was because I didn't use the AL as much to mask my feelings. Ugh! (Do we really have to hash all that old crap up again?) If someone disrespects me, and I'm drinking, I just tell 'em to go f*ck themselves. It's a whole lot easier that way than taking everything personally to heart.

Very interesting discussion.

I have not totally identified my triggers yet. I guess some of my triggers are failure, stress and success (weird!).

I do not feel like triggers have a such huge impact on me. But maybe the building up of pressure throughout the days - which presses you to drink is maybe one of this little triggers that add up.

Very often I am just longing for this feeling of having my body numb. I could easily replace alcohol with smoking pot (tried that once in Amsterdam). It gives me the same feeling - having all my body numb - and it feels so good.

Why do I want this feeling of my body numb? I think there is something more psychological behind it. Maybe something I have not figured out yet.

We drink because we have no choice if we are addicted. Eskapa explains this very well in the Letter to a Concerned Spouse. The important thig is to just take the nal an hour before we drink.

I'm sure you're on to something. I know that I'm dealing with feelings in regard to rejection that I haven't had to deal with in a long time - AL numbed them. I used to get very emotional when I felt someone disrespected or rejected me. Then, as my AL consumption rose, I thought I had grown up and learned how to handle these issues more maturely. Recently - and my AL is down by about 1/4, and my response down by 1/2 - I had a situation where a total ass created some drama whereby I was 'the bad guy.' (He sold me a hot tub that was delivered, supposedly useable, and it turned out to be a piece of crap - now what do you do with a huge, unworkable hot tub? Sell it to a friend?) Got mad that I called him on it, and bad-mouthed me to all our mutual friends. Since I don't bad-mouth anyone, even when it's well deserved (unless it's anonymous, like here!), he has them believing I am being an unreasonable bitch.

Now a few months back I would have told him to take the hot tub and shove it where the sun don't shine - and wouldn't have given a rat's a** about what he or anyone else thought. But now? I'm fighting depression b/c of what others might 'think' of me. I feel hurt they would believe him, and angry at him for bullying me rather than apologizing, as he should. Why? Because AL isn't numbing me any longer. I've got to deal with my feelings, and not 'gut up' with AL. Bummer.

So I wonder. If you want your body to feel numb. . .were you a victim of something physical? Just a thought.

As far as I know I was not a victim of something physical. I have a lot of empathy like you. I keep on thinking what do other people think, and I put very often their desires above mine. Trying to work on that, but it is really hard to change that sentiment into myself.

Drinking definitely stops me to think about other people and just keeps me focused on myself. Also I feel like everything is silent if that makes sense.
I had this when I stopped smoking tabacco - or it was the reason why I smoked - that I could have my thoughts stop for a moment and let me have some peace.