Je,

I am glad you are going to do what will work for you. And I do wish you luck, and I don't think you will have an issue with being af, for you have a lot going on right now.

Please keep posting for we love to hear about your progress,

Jaba

End of week 22 update.
52 drinks, 0 AF days.

This actually should have been posted on Monday but I've been very busy and away from the forum. I stated last weekend that I was going to try to go totally AF, and not surprisingly as soon as I said that I had a couple of very heavy nights of drinking (my alcoholism fighting back I suppose), but I at least have now managed to put together 2 AF days in a row so I'm finally on track with that plan and I'm hoping to keep it up for as long as possible. I'm back to feeling a little discouraged about my inability to get my numbers back down to the moderate range like they were during June and July, and while I would like to be able to continue with the "drink as you normally would" protocol longer and see if the numbers do naturally go back down again, I've unfortunately run out of time with being able to carry out that experiment as school has now officially started and I can't afford to be drinking heavily almost every night if I want to succeed. So going for total abstinence is my only option now. I really, really hope that my 5 months with TSM has created some changes in how my brain thinks about alcohol that will allow abstinence to work for me. I honestly do feel a little uneasy about it, but it is at least comforting to know that I have the Nal on hand, because in case I don't succeed at abstinence it will at least help to keep the drinking from getting as badly out of control as it would without it. That much I definitely know. I'll keep posting updates about how everything is going.

Je,

I do understand your situation and I wish you the best of luck for being AF for 5 months.

IF you do end up drinking, please do not carry on with "drink as you normally would" for that is not working for you. After you take that nal. and you wait that hour, try to make that first drink last as long as you can. Sip instead of gulp! I have been doing reading on the other forums and they do suggest that. Drink in normal situations that are triggers for you, but slowly drink and feel the nal. work. Sometimes we have to work for that control, for the nal. is just a tool not a magic pill. The nal. has given me the control to say no, and walk away, but before I felt I had no choice.

Please keep posting and let us know how things are working for you,

Jaba

je3625 sorry that things are so tough. I know that having to function at work, and to do things for my kids, helps me control things. Hopefully school will have the same effect on you. Good luck with as much AF time as possible. Let us know how you are doing. xoxo Newlife

[quote="jaba"]Je,

I do understand your situation and I wish you the best of luck for being AF for 5 months.

IF you do end up drinking, please do not carry on with "drink as you normally would" for that is not working for you. After you take that nal. and you wait that hour, try to make that first drink last as long as you can. Sip instead of gulp! I have been doing reading on the other forums and they do suggest that. Drink in normal situations that are triggers for you, but slowly drink and feel the nal. work. Sometimes we have to work for that control, for the nal. is just a tool not a magic pill. The nal. has given me the control to say no, and walk away, but before I felt I had no choice.

Please keep posting and let us know how things are working for you,

Jaba[/quote

Jaba is right on.

The waiting, and drinking water etc. can make all the difference. It is surprisingly effective!

I absolutely agree with sipping instead of gulping making a difference. I have always been a fast eater/drinker. I have been drinking a full can of seltzer when my one hour waiting period after taking the nal is up before having my first drink. That way I am not thirsty when I have my first drink and I do tend to drink more slowly. Last night I did not have the seltzer and I drank twice as much as I have been.

Deena,

We all have those hiccups, and I did last Sunday. I think you have to let your brain register what it is doing. I think this is like being on a diet; they tell you to focus on your food, for if you eat in front of the T.V. or sitting on the computer your brain isn't going to tell you you're full because you are distracted. But if you really focus on what you are eating and slow down your eating you realize you do not eat as much! The same theory applies with TSM (mindful drinking). I have been reading in the other forum and I have seen that posted more than once. Drink as you normally do: meaning the same triggers, "bad day at work, night cap, hungry, tired," but slowly drink until your brain can tell you it has had enough. If you are doing it out of habit and not listen to your brain(like eating popcorn at the movies) how will you really know you have had enough! At least that is just my opinion, and it has me drinking a lot less. I think the cravings will disappear over time, or I may have to always "mindfully drink". It might be just like being on that diet and if you go back to your old eating habits (pill or no pill) you will gain that weight back.

Je, I do hope that you can survive school, for it is going to be stressful. Just remember that your invisible friends are always here cheering you on!

Jaba

Week 24 update - 0 drinks, 7 AF days! Wow, does it feel nice to be able to type that. I finally managed to put together a whole week without any drinking even after attempting to do so unsuccessfully for a few weeks prior. I don't think I added my week 23 update, which was 59 drinks, 3 AF. This past week I definitely considered drinking on several days, but thinking about how nice it would be to be able to update a full AF week on here helped motivate me to at least delay it. And it isn't like I had any overwhelming cravings, just thoughts. Saturday evening I even took a Nal while I was out just in case, but I just wasn't feeling it and didn't end up even wanting to drink. So I'm pretty happy about all of those things.

Even though I'm still a TSM'er I've gotten re-involved to a certain degree in some abstinence-based support groups, which might sound a bit strange, but I think it helps to remind me that not getting drunk is a worthwhile goal. It's difficult to think about and set expectations of being permanently alcohol free, and I do think it's easier just to take it day by day and know that I always have the option of taking a Nal and just drinking a little bit if I do decide to give in to it, but that being abstinent feels great and it's good to do that as much as possible.

fantastic effort je, well done!

Thumbs up!