Mid week report for me so that I have a record of how things are going. Last night I felt the usual craving when leaving work, took my nal, that is all fine. Craving was pretty strong, though, at least in my mind. I was also extremely hungry (no lunch) which is never helpful for me. Got home and we decided to go out for sushi. Got to the restaurant, exactly one hour had passed thank God, ordered Chardonnay. The waitress said, "it is two for one". I asked my husband if he wanted the other glass but he said no, he wanted a beer. So they proceeded to immediately bring me two glasses of Chardonnay. They were small glasses, 5 oz at most. Normally, especially when hungry and craving, I would have immediately downed them both and been looking for more. But no, I SLOWLY drank one, sort of even had a hard time finishing it, finished my sushi, enjoyed concentrating on talking with my family, and left the second glass on the table untouched. I do not have to tell you that that would have been impossible for me pre-TSM. Things are happening!! (Also, no more to drink after I got home, I never even thought about it again).

I am learning for me that the key is mindfulness, not force. Also just being nice to myself instead of beating myself up, which all of you are making possible. Seriously, this would not be happening without nal or without all of you. I am finding that the success is building on the success.

Grateful!! xoxo Newlife

Newlife,

This brought tears of joy to my eyes! I am so happy for you and it sounds like a switch has been flipped!

One thing that I have noticed is you want a drink when you are hungry. And that reminded me of HALT.

Hungry
Angry
lonely
Tire

I think we need to be aware of our triggers to help us in this process, but maybe I am wrong.

Pat yourself on your back and wrap your arms around yourself for a big hug from all of us!

Jaba

Yay newlife!!!!!

I know so much what you mean. Last night I had two beers. One while grilling dinner and the other with dinner that I finished up for desert. Warning all caps ahead: THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE JUST 3 MONTHS AGO!!!!!!

I know what you mean by being hungry too. In fact what I've noticed now is that when I have dinner and satiate the hunger it sort of drowns out my desire for more to drink too.

Newlife, that is fabulous news. I am doing a little happy dance for you right now. For me the greatest feeling is not thinking about it again! When I think about how much time I spent thinking about when I was going to have my first drink and then how I was going to orchestrate how I was going to get enough... . Even forgetting to take the nal yesterday was amazing to me. When I first started this I planned to the minute when I would take the nal and clock watched until it was time.

Your announcement is worthy of all caps, Ocean. Doesn't it feel so flipping great?

I am so happy for all of us that we found TSM and each other for support!!

Ocean,

Your progress is amazing, for it sound like you are one of the lucky ones and are a fast responder. At the 3 month point I was still struggling...so you need to pat yourself on the back and wrap your arms around yourself for a big hug from all us as well...and you to Deena...just truly amazing!

Jaba

Thank you all, it feels so good to share good news with you, and you are always right there with me too when the news is bad.

Jaba, I know three months seems like a long time, but I had VERY LITTLE results at three months. Just keep going. You WILL get there.

Even though I am pretty stressed out from work, TODAY IS A GREAT DAY!! xoxo Newlife

I am definitely aware that I am one of the lucky ones and am very grateful for it. I still fear alcohol, it's only been 3 months. Fearing it is probably a good thing though. I can't imagine ever forgetting what it was like but since it's not a chronic part of my daily thoughts it does start to fade away. That's why I am weary of the whole concept of a cure.

But yeah I went from pretty much a raging alcoholic who the night before started TSM consumed 16 drinks down to 3 in just two days and have maintained that average ever since. I keep very good records.

It's nothing short of stunning as there are no words to describe it.

I still don't consider myself done yet. I feel like I never will but when I think about it one year ago when I first heard about TSM up to about 5 months ago when I heard about it again and started doing research to the time I bought my prescription and then delayed starting TSM because I was scared and thought that there is no way this will ever work, that it is snake oil just like all the other things I tried and wasted money on till today three months after starting it... No words really can describe it.

((huggs back))

That is super !

Thanks, Guapo and everyone else!! Newlife