Oh thank you Jaba - I REALLY need to read stuff like this - I know it will work eventually but I have been going at this for a long time !!!! Or so it seems - so it is good to read of folk that have taken longer than I have been here !!

And I am not sure that I am doing Friday as well - am doing today, then said I would do Wednesday and POSSIBLY Thursday! All bets are off for Friday too .....

Hugs, Maggie x

Oh - and I read back - it was YOU that suggested Friday too - LOL

Maggie and all,

As I am strolling along in the "cured" section, the one thing I found fascinating is there are a lot of people that it took 1+ years. These people have the same mind set I do, 'if I crave it I have a problem with it". So even though I am forcing my numbers down, I am forcing it and that booze brain of mine is still screaming! I will probably be on that 1+ year list, because to me it's more than being able to control your numbers. To me it is about looking at a bottle or a glass and not giving it a second thought. Or better nauseated over the thought of it.

I am having a hard time even thinking about being af tonight, because my friend and I always drink together. I know she will have a drink because her husband has lung cancer (I may be wrong). There is nothing more they can do for him, so they are putting him on a low dose of chemo. I know the emotions that I am going to be feeling tonight is going to be one for the records If I am not drinking.

So all, do I take my pill just in case, or should I be strong and stand alone?

Starting to get the feeling you all are willing to suffer just to see me suffer. Perverse. I will probably be hating you again Wed. and Thurs.
I ALWAYS take a pill with me "just in case". On my keychain. It is my talisman and reminder. And, weirdly, knowing I can drink if I want makes me feel in control. I don't cuz I don't choose to. Tell me "you can't" and I want to SO much worse. If, however I swallow the pill before I go, I am a little TOO ready to drink..
Steve.

But you will love us again by Friday .......

Hugs, Maggie x

Take the pill ..... just my tuppence worth ......

Hugs to you, Maggie x

That was what I was thinking. I think this might be a sad night. Didn't really think about it until now. It's going to be hard.

See above. I edited.
Of course I'll love you Friday.

Steve,

you can be mad...but hate is such a strong word for such a wonderful man!

Jaba

And thank you. I might have to stop and pick up a key chain.

Not so wonderful. You are right, though. Could never hate my mystical angels. Angry yes.

I too have a key chain thingy - the only thing is that twice it has somehow unscrewed itself so all of a sudden I had NO Nal plus it wasted what I had in there - but I have mine with me all the time otherwise ....

Hugs, Maggie x