It's kicking in big time!

Deena · **Joined:** Tue Aug 11, 2015 7:53 pm **Posts:** 446

Congratulations, Retread, and thank you for sharing! This thread gives me hope. I read nine months and my heart sinks but as I continue to read I realize that nine months is a short amount of time when considering my drinking history. I believe all good things in life are worth waiting and working for, so why should sobriety be any different? I am hopeful that kind people like you sharing their stories will keep me motivated and lift me up when I am down.

newlife · **Joined:** Thu Feb 26, 2015 12:54 pm **Posts:** 1204

retread wrote:

Hi Angelgirl (and everyone else!), My recent success did not come quickly. I am 9 months in to my second attempt at TSM. Back in 2010 when my ex wife and I started the long process toward divorce I just gave up. I stayed away until last October, so nothing has been quick. I'm Italian and Irish, with many relatives who struggled (some died) from alcohol addiction. I learned to drink in my uncles bar in my teens, sneaking beers in the walk in cooler and then hiding the cans. For years I was a weekend warrior, however gradually my drinking became a daily affair. Being self employed I would drink early, about 3pm, and be home by 7. Less likely to get a DUI that way. I never did get a DUI, even though many a time I had to drive with one eye shut. I've crashed motorcycles, cars, sunk a boat and would have crashed a plane if I knew how to fly. Regarding what I do at airports, I still go to a bar, log on to the free Wi Fi and order a club soda and cranberry. An AA guy told me many years ago that no one cares what's in your glass. It's quite true. I'm 62 and back to my college weight. A life long weight lifter my body has escaped the ravages of long term alcohol abuse. I get so much support here. AA might work for some but it made me feel like a defeated bum. AA made me more likely to drink, and from what I saw over many years the compulsion to drink is replaced by a compulsion to sit in rooms full of people you likely would not want to be caught dead with. I'd rather be truly free, and if I want to pamper my lady with champagne and caviar I take a NAL and go for it! All the Best, Retread

Retread, I LOVE LOVE LOVE this post. And I really need it right now. Six months in and struggling. And I agree, who wants to give up nice things like champagne and caviar? I am just looking forward to the time when I am not quite as desperate for it. (Champagne that is, I don't have a caviar addiction that I know of, though I love it. LOL). Please keep posting when you can and let us know about your CONTINUED success. Hugs from Newlife

retread · **Joined:** Sat Jun 26, 2010 7:12 am **Posts:** 126

Hi Newlife,
I'm sitting in a hotel room and am quite lonely at the moment. I have had 9 units this week, and 2 AF days so far. My week ends on Sat for TSM purposes. I'm trying to work but it's coming hard. I think I'll take a NAL, catch a workout, and have 3 beers and some wings. The point being that I'm secure in that I can now do this. I have a morning appointment, and then a 7 hour drive home. My gal and myself are donating platelets at the Red Cross on Saturday, so I will have a 4 AF day week and about 12 units total. Maybe not exactly where I need to be but a lot better than I was!
All the Best,
Retread

Maggie1929 · **Joined:** Thu Jan 22, 2015 12:27 pm **Posts:** 1691

Retread - to me a 4 AF week and 12 units is quite acceptable ! And kudos to you for donating platelets - I used to then they stopped me 'cos I lived in UK for over 3 years and they are scared I will give them mad cow disease. The fact that I am veggie and never had beef is not relevant - there is no box to tick for that!!! But platelet donation is hard and therefore commendable !! I felt from your post that you were sort of sad about having the 3 beers - but the very fact that you can do that now is wonderful! Go you,

Drive safely - hugs, Maggie x

newlife · **Joined:** Thu Feb 26, 2015 12:54 pm **Posts:** 1204

Retread - if I could have 4 AF days and 12 Units in one week consistently I'd be calling myself cured or in control or whatever it is. That is fantastic!! Sorry you had a lonely night. Even success with TSM doesn't guarantee that we won't have those from time to time, though, does it.

Hope things are better now. XOXO Newlife

retread · **Joined:** Sat Jun 26, 2010 7:12 am **Posts:** 126

Maggie and Newlife, you're the best! I really like hanging out here, and I'm very flattered that you take the time to read my posts. My ex mother in law is from the UK and I'm absolutely certain that she has mad cow disease. She passed it on to my ex wife who sues me every other lunar cycle. Oh well, we all have our crosses to bear. Thanks again for the kind words and encouragement, and I wish you both (and everyone) all the best.
Kind Regards,
Retread

Maggie1929 · **Joined:** Thu Jan 22, 2015 12:27 pm **Posts:** 1691

retread wrote:

My ex mother in law is from the UK and I'm absolutely certain that she has mad cow disease.
Retread

TOO funny Retread!!!! I am sitting here shaking my head !! And OF COURSE we read your posts!! Why on earth wouldn't we ? In fact if your EX is from the UK, then I am flattered that you are not blocking ME from reading your posts - LOL It really ticks me off that I cannot donate blood/platelets any more ! Anyway - moot point !

Please keep posting - no matter that you think your 12 units is not good - look at MY units ! But I know that I will get there in the end - and you will again too!!

Many hugs, Maggie x

UKblonde · **Posted:** Mon Aug 24, 2015 3:33 pm

Well I'm knackered then. :lol:

retread · **Joined:** Sat Jun 26, 2010 7:12 am **Posts:** 126

Dear UKB,
Since I am a Colonial I don't know what knackered means. Can you help out an ignorant subject of the British Empire? By the way I'm a direct descendent of Ethan Allen who helped kick ass on Gentleman Johnny Burgoine at the Battle of Saratoga. That was the beginning of the end of British rule. We still love you Brit's though. After all, I was married to one for 27 years.
All the Best,
Retread

Maggie1929 · **Joined:** Thu Jan 22, 2015 12:27 pm **Posts:** 1691

I must have missed something - knackered means tired - exhausted - cannot work out why UKB would be tired !! You and hubs both have something in common Retread being married to Brits - we have been married for 33 years - and he tells me that he cannot even hear my accent any more and is always surprised when anyone comments on it !

Hugs, Maggie x

It's kicking in big time!

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