Plantpro put this link up on his progress thread and I thought it was important enough to have it's own title and become a searchable part of the forum.

It really strikes home with me and has me thinking about why I do some of the things I do. I ended up having a long talk with my wife about it but it didn't come off the way I had hoped. I have 10 and 15 year old boys that are like a cat and a dog tied shut in a burlap sack. Fighting all the time and getting yelled at, it's just not healthy and some times it literally drives me to the brink.........and all I feel like doing is going off and slamming down a you know what, or two, or three........or ten. I told my wife last night that our two boys need counseling TOGETHER without us, and resolve their damn differences. I need more peace (a more enriched emotional environment), and then I think I could find more peace with myself.

Anyway here's the article Plantpro posted

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936.html

Thoughts?

All41, it seems counterintuitive, but using alcohol to relax and escape, simply postpones the problem, does nothing to solve it, and ultimately leaves you in a worse place. His idea of bonding with a substance, in our case, alcohol, it's right on the money.

That's for sure. I did it for many years.

Naltrexone disrupts the cycle of mindless addictive drinking, which from the sound of things around here, changes bonding from alcohol, back to good relations with yourself and everybody else.

BarryB4, Melissa, and Plantpro et al describe it well. It can take many months for your mindset to change, and realize alcohol just isn't important. You're not taking away something, but gaining so much more by not abusing alcohol.

BTW, your numbers look great !!

Yes I understand.

That article makes me think a lot about what led me down such a self-destructive path in the first place, and what I can do to fix things. I've gone from one addiction to another since the age of about 14, that's a good 4 decades worth. I'm not trying to dwell on the negative, just looking to the future and thinking about what I can do to make the best of the time I have left. No question that my goal at this point is peaceful healthy sobriety, but in order for that to work I feel like I need to work on correcting a few emotional triggers in my life.

All41, I run a home business in addition to my career. Now there is "free time" not taken up by drinking or recovering from drinking. That is now filled, with making the business significantly better, with the addition of a new product. Working on musical instrument performance issues, etc

Also made some very significant life changes, and now have a definite five-year plan, which never would've occurred a year and a half ago.

There is an underlying current around here, that getting rid of a daily love affair with alcohol is going to lead to despair. That the alcohol will be missed like a long lost love. I know that's how I felt, but I was dead wrong. Now I'm addicted to good things!

That makes total sense to me as I am such a loner, thus alcohol addict!

I like to hear stuff like that......and on that note, I'm going to get off my arse and the gym to exercise

chicken & egg situation maybe?

You know badger those were my exact thoughts after reading that article. The chicken & the Egg? Do we start out as loners and adapt alcohol in our life or become addicted and become loners? For me I know I was shy growing up, had family and friends but to mask my social anxiety alcohol did the trick for many years and then Bam an alcoholic was born. After years of using it for social situations I started to love the feeling (addiction) so drinking at home by myself was a grown up justification after a hard days work. Then I think the isolation actually came after with not being able to keep a relationship going, not wanting to drink and drive and so it continues now until TSM will kick in. Keeping the faith.
Nal On!

That's right on the money Cheeto and Badger.

I'm sure that my troubles as a teenager and chaotic family life led to my close relationship with Mary Jane and cigarettes (and to a smaller extent alcohol) that lasted until I was 30. At that point I gave up on the first two but the third grew worse over the next 25 years. Unfortunately, as Guapo points out, there a vicious circle that tends to self-perpetuate in a downward spiral. There's an escape there to be be sure, but it's only temporary, and what you're trying to escape from (anxiety, depression, emotionally unhealthy situations, or whatever) tends to get worse under the influence. I guess the good thing about that article is that it makes me take a hard look in the mirror, and if I'm honest with myself I can see the good the bad and the ugly, in myself, and in my environment.

That article also points out some of the things that need to change here in the USA. I think we're way behind the curve ball as compared to some other countries, especially with alcohol use disorders, where the only cure is "there is no cure, so you better find religion real quick or you're f&^ked". That example from Portugal was remarkable, but us Yanks have a long way to go.

" I think we're way behind the curve ball as compared to some other countries, especially with alcohol use disorders, where the only cure is "there is no cure, so you better find religion real quick or you're f&^ked". "

Well, think about it. Empowering yourself with TSM, and mindful ways to control the problem = satisfaction with high self-esteem.

Disempowering yourself with forced abstinence, and admitting powerlessness= dissatisfaction and loss of self-esteem, not to mention forced self-control, which may go on for many years.

Why people overdrink really doesn't matter, as it's not solving anything in any of those situations. What matters is getting past the alcohol abuse.

I spent many many days alone drinking, many many days accomplishing nothing. I cannot see how alcohol was of any benefit in any way during those years.