"I would love to become a moderate, normal drinker and still have all the pleasures of it without fear of losing control."

Naltrexone takes that away, as mentioned above. Overall, things are so much better, that I just don't really care about that anymore.

The Stick me with a Fork Blog lady said it best ....

When I was drinking, my goal every night was to get a little bit more than buzzed, a little bit less than drunk, and stay there. There was a sweet spot that, in my mind, had all the good things about drinking — relaxation, a certain contentment that bordered on euphoria, loving everyone, not minding anything — and none of the bad. No memory loss, no slurred speech, no outward signs of being affected.

The thing was, as time went on this state was devilishly tricky to find, let alone maintain. Somehow I started sweeping right by buzzed and going straight to drunk. I would have one drink and not feel a bit different. I’d have two and it would be closer, but not quite there. Then I’d have the third and I’d know I had gone too far before I even finished it. But I couldn’t think of anything to do about that except to maybe have a little more.

End of story. Naltrexone means never having to worry about finding that sweet spot, and that's okay.

You know, I think there are always tradeoffs. There is no genuine sweet spot with all of the good effects and none of the bad. Perhaps one of the differences with normal drinkers is that they know and accept this from the beginning, so that they're keeping an eye on the bad side and knocking it off before it overtakes the good.

Of course, once we've conditioned ourselves, none of that even matters.

I did it! Yesterday I had my 1st AF day in 35+ years! I got busy with a project and was simultaneously cooking dinner. It got late, the braise was finished, I was hungry, -and then-DARN-I had forgotten to take my NAL (so I could have my 2 glasses of wine with dinner)!

I was thinking of doing AF anyway after the 4th to see what happens with endorphins, -but there it was. So I'm going to go AF today as well!

Awesome Clarion! Soooo you have alot of opiate receptors today waiting for a big rush? What's it gonna be on? Hummm... have fun!

Good on ya !!

Congratz!

Update: AF 8 of the last 10 days. Amazing! On my 2 alcohol days I just had 3 beers each day, as I had a cousin pass by from half way across the country that I had not seen in 30 years and didn't want to appear to be "on the wagon".

Never thought I could do this, but here we are! No mad rush of endorphins, but still all good. More later, but time to get ready for work.

Wow, like a miracle. Wtg Clarion!

Wow, Clarion, that's fantastic! Very inspiring.

I hope to eventually care so little about alcohol that I quit drinking entirely, but one of the things I love about TSM is that even when that happens I'll be able to bust out some nal for those times that being "on the wagon" would be uncomfortable or conspicuous, like when an old friend comes to town.

I'm so happy for you.

Just checking in after a couple-week-long absence. Thought I really should after reading Goatbeard and his TSM skepticism. There is no doubt that I was a real alcoholic. I started TSM in mid-March and I remember crying as I read the book, tears streaming down my face, when I looked 4 months into the future (the average cure time) and saw myself living without alcohol. It all seemed so incredibly impossible, but just the mere hope brought on the flood of tears. It was still winter, and I was trying to picture myself in July, summer in full swing. Cured.

Well, July is almost out, and I rarely drink now, and then only if I want to. Thus, I rarely take NAL any longer. I was so chained to those pills! Now they are always with me, but no longer important. Life is better now without the NAL, but the change wasn't anything dramatic. What was lost, will stay lost. But I am not complaining. What was gained, will remain. I now look at it like this: Pre-Nal I had the wonderful endorphin -alcohol rushes that I so loved, -but I also had all the hangovers and other negative stuff that went with it. Now the highs are gone, but all the lows too, and life is just on an even keel. It's better this way, -no question. Just takes getting used too. I am still amazed after 35 years of hard drinking that I am not drinking any more. I think about that fact everyday because alcohol was the most important thing in my life and now it's gone. But it is not at all hard for me to be AF.