Awesome Barry! I've been following your thread and must say that it's helped a lot. My story is very similar to yours in that I've been a problem drinker for 20 years now, drinking everyday for at least the last 12. As I write this, it's my first AF day in years and I've only taken NAL twice, my first day being Friday. Its great to know that I have a very good chance of moving on to the rest of my life.. BTW you're correct, it's the little things I've missed over the years that were so beautiful today, as I watched my kids play!!

Wow, that's a great sign. I would recommend knocking out as many alcohol-free days as you can. Also, don't get psyched out about the "honeymoon stage" that everyone warns about. I just told myself that, if the urge returns, I will just have to use more willpower. The urge never really returned. 95% of my progress happened in the first 10 days or so and each week has been better than the last. I also really try to enjoy the experience of being alcohol-free (like I've said, I love sleeping without any alcohol in my system, I love being able to run errands all hours of the night 100% sober, I love playing difficult board games with my family while sober [try playing Rummicube while drunk!], I love waking up feeling awesome, I love working out or going swimming at 9:00 at night, I love being sexually functional again, I love not having to worry about my kids thinking I'm drunk, I love reading at night, etc...). Once you really, really prefer being 100% sober, it's sort of the tipping point towards a whole new future than that which you would have had.

Hi all,

I was just reading the last few posts abt liver disease and pains etc. But I though liver disease is 'silent'?

This is a quote from an NHS website:

Alcoholic liver disease refers to liver damage caused by alcohol misuse. It covers a range of conditions and associated symptoms.
Alcoholic liver disease does not usually cause any symptoms until the liver has been extensively damaged. When this happens, symptoms can include:
• nausea
• weight loss
• loss of appetite
• yellowing of the eyes and skin (jaundice)
• swelling in the ankles and abdomen
• confusion or drowsiness

Barry my man. Please don't leave us anytime soon. I am very jealous of your current accomplishments.

Querty and Joe38f,

Keep us updated.

Thanks, and welcome.

Alice -- The liver has hardly any nerves, so the "pain" one feels (if ever) is the swollen, fatty liver pressing onto the surrounding sensitive tissue. Also, I was reading that liver enzymes aren't always high, so labs don't always tell the whole truth. The "fatty" liver (which we all here either have or have had) slowly but surely turns into a dead, scarred (cirrhotic) liver. Also, the bloatedness of the liver slows down blood flow to the liver from the large portal vein, so you get what's called "portal vein hypertension" (picture a traffic jam of blood trying to get into your liver) which causes varicose veins in your esophagus and elsewhere. So, "esophageal varices" are basically varicose veins on the inside of your esophagus that eventually burst, leading to a very ugly death (I saw this 45 y.o. alcoholic, laying flat on a bed, vomit about a gallon of pure blood about 3 feet high, which then landed on his face -- it was a horrible sight; he died an hour later). I think this type of bleeding is more common than full blown liver failure, because that's what often gets you before the cirrhosis.

Christopher -- It's not really an accomplishment. I'm really not "doing" anything, I'm just "not-doing." You, too, can "not-do."

Barry .... Great to read your progress .. interesting what you say about wanting more and mroe AF days

I managed 2 in a row yesterday and Sunday ... quite pleased (this is good for me!) and was hoping for this up-regulation thingy this morning

Had quite a good work out... nothing over the top ... probably would have got a better buzz from jogging - but so much bl**dy snow here, it wasn't an option

Any ideas how to make the best of this up-regulation?? and the exact time it happens?

Lorraine

I know nothing of upregulation. I've certainly never experienced some heightened sensory experience when enjoying endorphin activities. Sex and exercise feel just as good as ever (well, better, of course, because I'm sober -- but the same as they did before I became addicted).

Hey everyone...Logging out for awhile. I'm getting diminishing returns from this website and, as helpful and vital as this website has been, it's actually having a negative effect on me now (too much distraction; so many stories of people NOT succeeding and all their drinking tales makes me doubt my experience). So, I'm going to "sabatoge" my account and hope to "unsabotage" it sometime around Easter. Peace be upon you all.

Please feel free to e-mail me at barrybrockelman@yahoo.com (not my real name).

I look forward to your return. Peace to you also.