I'm just trying to put it in context of what I understand. Basically, you're saying 100 drinks is about 9-10 pints of vodka per week. That I can understand. All I can say is, "Holy *#)%#" that's a lot of vodka.

Week 7 Results - S24, S8, M0, T10, W5, T14, F12 74 for Week 7 with 1 AF

Week 8 So far S17, S14

Wednesday, half pint on the way home, but stopped after that, ate dinner, and went to bed.

Thursday, pint on the way home with four more beers at home.

Friday, 0 on the way home. 5 beers in driveway with neighbor, stopped drinking and went shopping with wife, then friends text and wanted to go to fish fry. 2 beers before fish fry and 7 beers at fish fry.

Sat, pint on the way home (worked Saturday out in rain all day), and 8 more beers at a bachelor party

Sun, pint on the way home (worked Sunday out in rain all day), and 5 beers at home after dinner before bed.

Not a very good story and definitely not proud, however, the only small positive note was that week 7 I hit a low count of 74. Perhaps I should note that I did not have a booze stash in the house. I through away my vodka stash bottle I kept in the utility room after last weekends bender when the wife was away. My stash bottle had always looked like a bottle of rubbing alcohol (and pretty much smelled like it) but was a vessel I had washed out and refilled with vodka over the last year. Sad isn't it.

Unfortunately my projections for week 8 so far are at 108.5

I have no scheduled booze events this week until Saturday afternoon, which is a St. Pats party. So basically, I need to limit my drinking alone. (Probably 80% of my boozing.)

Good luck to all tracking their weekly progress this week.

Christopher,
Good to hear from you. I always look forward to your posts since we have so much in common. Getting drunk on Friday fish fries? Sounds like you live in Catholic country. I used to live in Wisconsin (Wauwatosa, or "Whitey-tosa"). I absolutely loved it up there -- the best place in America, in my opinion. That's a great idea about the rubbing alcohol. I never thought of that. We bought a bottle of rum in the Caribbean this summer and I told my wife to "hide it somewhere." She's the worst hider ever. One night, I was Jonesin' for some more alcohol to keep the buzz going and searched the closet for about 15 seconds, found it, and downed it. It was after the liquor stores closed, so I "went jogging" up to 7-11 and got some apple juice, which I then used to refill the rum bottle. Over the next two months, I probably drank that one bottle of rum (it was a pint sized bottle) about 30 times!! That thing was like a curse in my closet. Eventually, I just threw the whole thing away and my wife has never said a thing about it, like, "By the way, where did that bottle of rum go?" For her, out of sight, out of mind. For me, every drop of alcohol in my house was inventoried in my head and was like a siren call to me --- "Oooooo Aaaaaaa, Driiiiiiiiink meeeeeee." I'd wake up in the morning (feeling like crap, of course) and then inventory where I put all the "empties" (mostly vodka containers) and proceed to find them and throw them away. I now have old beer and opened wine in my mini-bar getting all skanky. Absolutely amazing. I never would have thought that possible. It's not due to any virtue on my part, but simply to the power of TSM.

I know you might not want to share too much, but I'm really curious what you think your wife thinks about your drinking. I can't imagine you not zoning out and being zombie-husband a lot of the time. Do you ever get mean when you're drunk, or do you just get chillaxed? Is she a drinker?

Also, seriously, it's Tuesday and you're already projecting 108.5 units for the week? I have to call you out on that one. That's pretty lame.

Good Stuff.

A year ago I confessed completely in January to her and was straight up open on how much I drank, including the vodka on the way home. I went cold turkey for a month. Registered and posted on SoberRecovery website. Our freinds were like, wtf is wrong with you. (Not her but most of our booze buddies. I lied and said I was changing meds and doc wanted me to not drink in the process. I even told my doctor that I was trying to quit. He actually blew me off a bit I think. He is our age, and a pretty good boozer himself. That is actually why I chose him.) It was a good but difficult month. She drinks but, never alone, never with just me, only when we are at a couples drinking event. She has always been the good wife and stopped drinking early enough to make sure we have a safe ride home.

She is a great wife, however, I was skipping many social events due to the temptation a year ago, and she suggested, maybe if you make it a month, we can go to the next party, and you can have a couple. She also has the out of site, out of mind mentality, and forgets things fairly quickly. I'm sure you know where that ended up. My booze gremlins were like, hell yeah, we are back with a vengeance. Right back into the pint of vodka daily ground hog day scenario.

I've always been a "chillaxer" and clown to embarrassing levels when I get skunked. I have had my angry moments. Fist in wall once, kicked and busted a kitchen cabinet door once.

I was in several fights many years ago in my pre-married/pre-children days 17-23 vintage. Bar fights, night club parking lots, strip club parking lots, etc.

After my 1 month dry spell, I limped through another boozefest in 2012, again to feel guilty after the holidays. Again to go researching a fix for me on the internet. I found this website in mid January. Ordered from All Day and didn't tell her yet. Once I saw it clear customs, we came home that night from a minor boozefest, I pulled out my laptop, and told her to read how TSM works. She read a bit, but not very deeply. Basically, she said, it appears to be a common trend for me in January to talk to her about my problem and try and fix it. She said go for it. She is supportive, however, still tends to ignore my problem unless it is impacting her immediately and directly. We do refer to my booze problem more and more all the time openly to each other.

Example, I brought home a 3# bag of Skittles from Sam's a week ago. ($7, that's cheap.) She didn't ask why. Friday I brought home another 3# bag and a 6# bag of gummy bears also, ($14 for 9# of super sugar city). She asked what was up with that. I said it helps sometimes for me to not want to drink. All she said was, "That's Weird".

Her parents booze a lot, so she is sort of programmed into accepting it a bit. They are not as hard core as me, and probably considered in the grey area of borderline alcoholic/low end alcoholic. My father on the other hand is a recovered AA alcoholic. He quit right after I was born. He is a stronger man than me, but I'm working on it. I actually attended several alateen meeting and events through grade school. I could never accept the AA solution for me years later when I realized where I was heading. Somehow, I have programmed my entire existence, starting in high school, selecting my friends and co-workers and even youth sport clubs for my children based on the fact that they are drinkers, and I would fit in. So AA and abstinence seems like an even harder road for me than TSM. I have coached many youth sports throughout the years and selected players and other parent coaches based on their parents "social skills". How bad is that?

That all said, I need to actually go back to work, but I must post my projections.

Week 8 So far S17, S14, M3

As most days go, I wanted to go AF, however, the gremlins were talking yesterday afternoon, Monday. I did fight off the vodka urge at the 7-11, and went for a 24 oz can of some malt beverage watermelon cocktail with 8%. Milked it on the way home, and the urge was gone. Dinner with family, Walking Dead replay from yesterday, and then slept through The Bachelor while the rest of the family watched Katherine win.

Week 8 projections 79.3333

I stated earlier that I am an Alcoholic Mathematician. Actually I am an Alcoholic Civil Engineer. So I have decided to start carrying my projections to 6 significant digits.

One more thing. Not only am I in a dense Catholic Community (Boozers), our city is very much a "Proud" German community (Boozers), and our city has an excellent Volunteer Fire Department, (Boozers), that I have recently retired from after 14 years of service.

Hey Chris,

I just wanted to drop a line to say that 90% of your post could be written about me without anyone knowing the difference. My wife is exactly like yours, family and all, and my dad quit the day I was a positive pregnancy test. I used to do all that barfight ****. I thought it made me the Hemingway of Somerville, MA.

I also have surrounded myself with drunk friends, but like you, I go the hardest of all of them. It's funny... I just moved cross country and now I see the selection process in action. Went to J&T's for a World Series party - no one got drunk, just good snacks and some polite conversation. Couplea beers each, max. BORING. Won't be going there again. On a random weeknight, M&K get freaking loaded and I have to drive them home because I'm still maintaining? Oh yeah, these are my kind of people.

Problem is, even having identified this pattern, I can't break it. I truly am bored to f***ing death by squares. Honestly, I believe this is a large part of why AA works for some people. You still get to hang out with "your people," just without the drinking.

Anyway, I don't have many tips for you. Since you mentioned alcohol replacements, in the past I have had some success with drinking a ginger ale with 4-5 dashes of bitters in it when I want a drink but don't want alcohol. It's got the familiar bite to it that you want... Come to think of it, I'm gonna re-incorporate that one these days... Also, since it seems that you are a long-haul drinker like I am/used to be, I would say to be careful of the nal wearing off. 6-8hours after your first one, it's probably time for another.

Hope things get better brother, and you aren't one of the few that doesn't respond. Best of luck.

Hi Chris

good to hear how you getting on (and how you got here) ...

Funny about the skittles (we have them here in Scotland too) ... I like you find not drinking much easier with sweeties ... the more sugar the better. Chocolate doesn't cut it ... probably because the fat slows down the glucose hit that alcohol and sugary sweets give us!

When I was pregnant and couldn't drink (hardly drank at all) I ate SO many sweets I was borderline diabetic by the end of pregnancy.

Wonder if anyone else out there has that sugar connection? Careful with those skittles ...well done on your progress

Lorraine

Ditto for my wife. Maybe there's a pattern there?

Anyway, I will say that I live in the "Bible Buckle" (the center of the Bible Belt) and I rarely even see anyone drunk anymore (outside of the hospital, that is). Also, in response to generic's anti-"square" statement, I suppose in contrast I like being around calm, well-educated, affluent suburbanites, most of whom are moderate drinkers or abstainers (I am probably one of the most dysfunctional drinkers in the whole crowd). That's definitely my comfort zone. If I went heavy drinking with my old high school buddies, I would probably feel very awkward and uncomfortable and wouldn't drink much. In fact, I've always been the type to not drink much at events where people are drinking alot (e.g. New Year's Eve), yet drinking all the rest of the time (e.g. before Mass! ). I guess I partly saw the part-time drinkers as "amateurs" and didn't want to stoop to their level.

Yes, this would be so much harder if, like Christopher, I had multiple drink-fests to go to with festive German Catholics and macho firemen egging me on -- "Chug, chug, chug, chug." But, alas, "bloom where you are planted." Christopher, you're either going to have to be the non-drinker (or, at least, very moderate drinker) among the rowdy crowd, expand your horizon and develop new friendships, or keep barreling down the precarious track you are on right now. It's not an enviable choice.

Week 8 So far S17, S14, M3, T9

Week 8 Projection 75.2500

I have come to another conclusion, that I do much better with TSM when my wife is nearby or waiting for me at home, than I do when I am running completely solo.

I had weird self educational session consuming 9 beverages last night. Firstly, No vodka, so that's good thing, but the 9 units was another failure on my part, even though educational.

Last night I had to go solo, no wife, to a soccer game. One of my many triggers. 2 months ago, I would have 5-9 vodka units en route home and to game in a macho bubba mug. At game I would have a couple with a dad before and at half. Probably some sort of 24 oz unit on the way home to refill macho bubba mug. So I would have had probably 15 units over 5 hours. Sorry, not proud of this, just being embarrassingly honest.

http://www.intox.com/drinkwheel.aspx This website says I would have been at a 0.125 BAC estimate over the 0.08 BAC limit

So last night, starting yesterday afternoon at work, I kept pondering how I will deal with this. My flawed decision started out like this. First I grabbed a 24 oz 3 unit super sweet drink for the ride home. Stopped at grocery store, and dammit, they had the same thing there cold so I grabbed another. So now my macho mug has the equivalent of 6 units in it, full of the super sweet malt beverage. Before leaving home, I filled my pocket with skittles for support. (I know that sounds stupid, but I listen to my gremlins way too much.) So I'm battling the norm with sweet malt beverages and skittles.

I proceed to drop off my child, and park the car and come to another stupid decision. Went to gas station to get another backup, possibly for the ride home to put in bubba macho mug. Mind you, it pretty much has 75% of the original 2 cans I put in there, but I fail and go. At this part of town, they must not sell singles, so now I have to by a six pack. I then decide to not get the watered down beer, but get a 6 pack of the girly 5% malt beverage sweet stuff, Smirnoff ice i think. So now I basically have in my possession, included what I have already consumed, the equivalent of 12 units. Halftime came and I went to the car for several slurps, then topped of the bubba mug for the ride home. Watching the second half, I devoured all the skittles in a last ditch effort. On the way home, I truly did not enjoy the sweet beverage, however, did realize out of habit I guess, taking a slurp every mile or so. If it would have been vodka or even not so sweet beer, I think I would have probably set my goal to make sure I had drank the last slurp when I hit the driveway.

Once I arrived at home, I throughout the remains in the bubba mug and full bottles of the Smirnoff Ice into the trash can. I think I may have throughout 4, but can't be sure, so I am saying 3 to be conservative on my weekly count, and post 9 for last night. 0.05 BAC estimate

Definitely not as good night as only 3 units, or none at all, however, I may stick with the sweet filling malt stuff for a bit, as it really does get filling fast. (Probably get even fatter with all the sugar, but I will try it again when I am battling the gremlins solo, and my wife is not around.)

Wow, now you're at risk for liver failure AND diabetes! Yes, that is embarassing, but funny, too. I have many similar stories, though your sweet tooth is pretty outrageous. You should try hard candy (like lemon drops) to mildly quench that desire. I'm really trying to picture what you look like in real life. Are you a pretty heavy guy?

My lean mean fighting weight graduating high school was 225. 235 when I graduated college. (8 year college plan. Night school, working and commuting. I actually wouldn't drink on the way from work to school. Back then I would only have a 40 oz bottle of Busch on the way home from college. HMMMM, those were the days.) I'm 6' tall and could pass for Stone Cold Steve Austin back when I was 235-240. Now I am 280. I weight lifted a lot in my 20s, off and on in my 30s, and very little in my 40s now. Mostly just the elliptical machine, and that only runs in streaks. I need to be on that thing daily.

BAD DIET ALERT! I actually lost 40 lbs a couple of years ago somehow, back down to 240 by unintentionally skipping dinner. I was so busy after work with kids sports, a few drinks on the way home before practice, and tailgating with dads after practice. I was on the no dinner boozing diet. Somehow I wouldn't even wake up for the midnight munchies. Gained it all back again. That diet is never gonna make the Dr. Oz show. Anything over 4 beers and chances are pretty good, I'm waking up in the middle of the night for a visit to the pantry.

TRIGGER ALERT TO SELF! Tonight I will be solo again. My wife is taking youngest to practice. I think I will work late as I can stand staying here and try and time my arrival at home via the shortest direct route home as the same for the wife and youngest arrival home.