With a bit of shame, I'm back here in this community at the begining of the TSM journey once again.

I started the TSM journey the first time in the beginning of 2009 and considered myself free of my cravings in the later part of that year (Sept or so). I was free of my addiction for over 2 years, when I began to drink on a two week vacation without taking Nal because I had forgotten it. By the end of the vacation, the craving for alcohol started to creep back into my life. At the end of this vacation, I went home and started back on Nal (Nodict from River, previously was taking Nal from a US Pharmacy), but for some reason I didn't think it was doing anything, so like an idiot I just stopped taking it in early 2012.

Fast forward 6-8 months and I'm back int he throws of my previous addiction, back up to 60 or so units a week. Looking back to where I was a year ago, I can't believe I drank even one time without taking Nal.

I can say with absolute certainty that TSM worked for me and I can say with the same certainty that drinking without taking Nal will return one to your addiction.

This week, I re-dedicated myself to TSM and will be charting my progress back to the Cured List.

Q

Welcome back Q, and please don`t be hard on yourself ! At least you have the recipe this time, and you know it`ll work.
Good luck !

Somewhat related:

I never considered myself cured but could comfortably hold at 14-21 units/week (1-2 AF days/week). Then two things happened:
1) I stopped counting, 2) I switched from Naltima to Nodict. Gradually, the units went back. I am now at 40-60 u/week and mildly craving by 5 PM. That's nowhere near the bad state I was in before TSM but...

Maybe it is a delusion but I tend to think it's #2. Somehow, the slight disgust after a couple units that I had on Naltima is hardly ever felt while taking Nodict (and I never drink without taking Nal!). Unfortunately, the only place where Naltima can be had at a reasonable price is Alldaychemist - which now requires prescription that I don't have because for employment reasons I cannot have the alcoholism treatment anywhere in my records.

At this point I am going to start taking 100 mg of Nodict/day (Nodict is easy to buy through River and UnitedPharmacy) and will start counting - but not consciously limiting. Will also try ordering from Alldaychemist without providing a prescription. From the sound of it, the shipment won't make through the Indian customs but I'll try anyway.

You know what, Nodict was the NAL I was taking when I eventually felt it wasn't working...

Maybe you are on to something there.

Q

I think TSM is only a cure if you carry on with taking the tablets, so perhaps 'cured' isn't the best word to describe it's effects. I certainly don't intend ever drinking without it, I've seen the graphs in the Sinclair Method book which showed the reversal in rats when they were taken off the nal and continued to be given alcohol. Return to previous drinking was pretty rapid.

Oh, Q, I'm so sorry to see you back!!! I remember you as one of the Cured from way back. I was here too under another name, stopped taking nal and here I am as "Revert" - same story for me. I've tried Topamax too and found it was quite effective except the side effects are so horrific that I had to stop taking that and ended up drinking in an addicted fashion again.

I guess naltrexone, and TSM is the only way to go. The benefit of having you back, Q, is that you can help all the newbies here with your wealth of experience.

I'm having an AF day today - my second since my re-start and I'm pretty happy about that. This is a very scary process. Welcome back.

Edit: I take Nordic from River and find it very effective and have never had a bad batch.

What was your previous username?

Yea, it is a real bummer to have let AL creep back into my life. I look back to where I was last summer and I remember being invited to have a beer with some co-workers and I couldn't even finish the one beer because I wasn't interested! The TSM does most definitely work.

I honestly do think it was a combination of me stopping for that few week period, then perhaps a bad batch of NAL. That and when I did get back on taking NAL, I didn't track my numbers. I think this is another crucial part of TSM.

I'm back on the TSM and am looking forward to being free of my cravings once again come December or so.




I did look really hard at the MWO method using Topo because of how long it takes for TSM to work. I just want to be rid of the effects of over drinking -- I hate it. I then read about all of the horrible side effects of Topo and kept thinking that you don't get rid of the cravings like you do with TSM. One day it just hit me that I had to bite the bullet and travel the TSM road once again. So, here I am.

Q

Hi Q,

I'm sorry to hear that you've had a bit of a relapse, but if it's any consolation, we've been seeing quite a few veteran members wander back to the board after previously declaring a "cured/regained control" status. I expressed some reasons for why this may be occurring on another thread...

On the subject of relapses popping up, I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that this community has not been around for very long, and these particular cases may be trickling in simply because our community is "aging" "evolving" or "cycling." Those who have contributed to the TSM forum, progressed, regained control and then relapsed know that they have a place they can turn to, and perhaps we are just experiencing this new phase as a community.

It is comforting to know that the vets that have had alcohol creep back into their lives are returning to a treatment that they know has worked in the past...kinda like someone who loses a bunch of weight on a particular diet, relaxes their discipline and puts a few pounds back on, but then returns to the diet once again to see the same results. This is no different.

Welcome back, and I hope your second ride on the rollercoaster is over before you know it!

-H

Very interesting... I was always on Nodict gotten from River and always felt its effects were very subtle.

A couple years ago another member sent me some of hers because I was in fear of running out. I managed to get some more nodict but did take a couple of hers. The effect was VERY different. I didn't think too much of it at the time but now I'm really wondering if what I was taking actually could ever have worked. At the ridiculous prices that were (are?) being charged for the stuff, there is powerful incentive to counterfeit it.

FWIW, the pills I "borrowed" were marked 50 902 b - Barr Labs generic naltrexone.

Someone needs to get some Nodict tested. Looking back I think there is something wrong with it.

I'll fill everyone in later on my current situation, which in a nutshell is that I'm almost 7 mos AF with no desire, no cravings, not even any thoughts to speak of. This time period includes a class reunion held at an establishment known for crazy drinking and several other events where booze flowed freely (and was free). Didn't touch a drop and didn't miss it.

And that with no, nal, no other drugs, no AA, no treatment, no nothing. Just a crappy situation that woke me up to the fact that I was letting too much life and opportunity pass me by while I was being drunk, unmotivated and lazy. Oh, and the realization that I was going to end up dead sooner or later (if I kept it up) was a pretty good motivator too.

I just think it's all part of the TSm process and unless we go AF there'll always be the odd spike.