Hey, Chrissie, just catching up with you, you're doing great!, making steady progress and congrats on the AF days, I know that's a big step for you, so well done you!

Did you feel the up-regulation?

Remember, if you plan an AF day and it doesn't happen, it's ok, it can also work the other way, you could have a day when you plan to drink and then you don't. On AF days, don't forget to eat protein and drink plenty of water, I found that that really helps, especially at Drink O'Clock, this would ease my cravings and if I could plan some activity that I don't usually do at that time, I was home and away.

Nal on!

Curi

Hi Chrissie!

It's been awhile thought I'd touch base. I've dropped off again, so this is my resolve. I'm going to start a new thread, I believe I've removed my progress from before.

I’m starting all over again! Picking myself up, dusting myself off. When o when is this going to stop. I know when I start putting some serious effort into it I'll start seeing results. I have been half assen it, enjoying drinking way too much and it’s getting out of control.

I discovered that I’d had been drinking through the nal, so my drunk brain says then why take it? So I did it again, yes the alcohol took me over again. I’m deciding to wipe my slate clean and just start over again, with a new attitude.

With the experience I’ve had I’m making some firm rules for myself.

1) No drinking two days in a row.
2) A must! Take my nal 1 hour before drinking.
3) Getting involved with something so I don’t get bored. I started back into my flying which gives me something fun back in my life other than drinking.
4) Exercise 4 – 5 times a week at least.
5) Getting back to the forum!

That’s all I can think of right now, I’ll reserve the right to add more later. Today I am getting out in my yard and some work done! I have 18 yards of mulch to spread, hopefully I can get it done before the rain comes.

Things aren’t going so well with BF and I, he works a lot, comes home exhausted and falls asleep on the couch. I don’t have much to look forward to, so I drink because I’m bored. We don’t go out much because of the expense plus he’s working 6 – 7 days a week. Next week he’s going to be gone out of town for 4 days. Well…

Zip

Greetings. Just checking in to see how you are doing. Your numbers look great! So proud of you. My numbers are still not where I want them so I am going to try some of you tips for more AF days. My brain keeps trying to drink thru the meds. Hope you have a great weekend.

Got your post. Same here. This week has not been good. I have had 2af days so far but the days I have drank have not been good. Numbers have been high and last night I really am foggy about going to bed. I keep looking at other people's numbers for inspiration. I just pray it works for me. I am going to keep on pushing thru this phase in hopes for a cure.

Hey Chrissie, how are things? Everyone has given you great suggestions and to me it seems like you're well on your way to regaining control. Keep us posted!

An interesting week: 0-3-0-2-6-0-0 = 11 aus and 4 AFs...which matches my best #s to date. And notice that there are TWO AF’s IN A ROW, a first! For some reason, I’ve been unable to put 2 together before, and in fact, attempting to do so has resulted in some drinking w/o Nal episodes: I plan to try to be AF and then rebel and...off to the races. Fortunately by now, drinking w/o Nal pretty much feels the same as drinking WITH Nal - the extinction process must be advanced, despite my occasional bad behavior.

I’ve been puzzling over my stagnant progress, and the aforementioned blatant bad behavior: 4 times in the last 10 weeks, I have drunk w/o Nal. It is an impulse - not planned, but still...what’s up w/ that? I think I have figured out what is going on in Lizard Brain: alcohol is really no longer a problem, so lets PAR-TAY!!!

A year ago I was completely miserable over alcohol and the despair I felt that I couldn’t do anything about it. Thanks to Nal, this has not been the case for a long time. And frankly, the first two beers feel very pleasant, which reminds me of the “good” part of the “bad old days”. For a long time now, I’ve recognized that those first two beers are nice and after that it’s just...calories I don’t really need, and too much work (to keep drinking). But I often DO, in some kind of rebellion - I’ve always thought most rules don’t really apply to me - and also that alcohol is just not scary anymore.

What I’m doing w/ TSM reminds me of people who lose 20, 30 lbs., by working hard, exercising, eating right...and then at the last 5 or 10 lbs. get “stuck”. They feel so great they think “why bother???”

That’s where I am now. I’m messin’ around w/ TSM because I feel SO much better. And no longer scared of alcohol! But...as long as I ever wake up feeling shame and even slightly hung over, I am NOT where I want to be. That is my definition of cured: Shame’No’Mo.

So...what will Chrissie do: close the deal, or keep trying to have it both ways??? Stay tuned...

Chrissie is going to close the deal. I think by asking the question you have already decided the answer...

Eric

Hey Chrissie - sounds like you're in a great place and I agree - I think you might be on the edge of cured. I know exactly what you mean about "rebelling" and drinking without nal because it's not so.. scary anymore!
When I first started TSM I was so terrified of my own behaviour that I was willing to take nal every single time and vomit through it and whatever for the rest of my life because I wanted to control things. Now that I'm 90% in control...that 10% seems so much less scary and like you said, we get kind of stuck.
But let's unstick !!!!

EL: wooHOO!!!

Hi Chrissie and thanks for stopping by on Revert's Ramblings.

You said:

The other thing that was an "aha" for me was to look at my discomfort level on an AF evening. I'd be AF, but restless and petulant and wanting to cave in. Then I'd think, "seriously, Chrissie, how miserable ARE you???" and I realized it was really only about...20% or so. At which point I'd know I could tolerate that - how spineless AM I, after all?" And the discomfort was a transient moment- not relentless.

Thanks for that. So tonight when I'm planning an AF (although I'm regretting it already...) I will assess my level of discomfort and actually take a look at what's going on. I kinda know that it's because I feel I can't control what I do around that time - my DH and I have such different needs for food and at different times - and I don't seem to be strong enough to just do what I need to do - this causes me to feel very anxious!! Geezzzzeeee!!!! you'd think I was a little kid!!! I'm a senior citizen already and can't eat when I need to? How crazy is that??????? But it's one thing to know you're nuts and another to stop that behaviour and take control of one's own life.

And I'm sure all of us know what drinking to self-medicate is all about!!! Anyway thanks for the tip. I'll take the naltrexone at 4pm just to be on the safe side because I feel like caving right now. Just taking about how anxious I'll be hours from now is making me want a drink!!! I guess I've got some thinking to do!!!!