I'm having a tough time, and have been debating about whether to share here. I don't want anyone else to get discouraged. On the other hand, if this is all part of the typical TSM 'journey,' then it's important to log it for those who will follow.
I am not thru this week, until the end of today. But four out of the last six days have been heavy drinking days - at, or nearly at, pre-Sinclair levels. Two days were quite light drinking days (TG), so my weekly average will probably still be in the 50 upw range, which is 20-30 less than pre-Sinclair.
What has me worried is that I HONESTLY thought I had only 4 glasses of wine last night. A personal issue had me up late, journaling. (As a writer, that's how I clear my thinking.) I decided to pour a night-cap, and go to bed. When I looked for the 'other' bottle of wine I had chilling in the fridge,
it was friggin' gone! Somehow, I drank the whole thing on a totally unconscious level. It's not like I had a black out - I completely recall every other aspect of the evening. I swear I recalled pouring each glass, and drinking it. But evidently. . .not.

So, I checked the trash. Sure enough, there was the empty bottle.
I have never in my life done anything like that before. It's frightening. Even when I drank much more heavily, I always had a good general idea about how much alcohol I consumed. But somehow last night, one whole bottle went completely up in smoke!
Bummed. Very, very bummed. And perplexed. (And tired. . .)
Has anyone here had a similar event happen? All I can think is, "WTF???!!!"
PS: Edited to add: for the first time in MONTHS, I feel like pouring a drink in the early morning. What is going on in my BRAIN?