Hi EL,

Glad you had a great healthy weekend but I'm sorry you are feeling sick. Congrats on ONE unit this week! Wow, awesome. Have a great Halloween.

Hope you're feeling better EL. There is something that feels slightly virtuous about being GENUINELY sick, as opposed to just hungover, don't you think? So long as it's not too serious of course.

Sounds like you are doing a great job of a self-improvement on a number of fronts, not just the drinking. I think that is key. Sobriety is not much of a fulfilling goal for it's own sake, I've discovered! It's the other stuff like your health and relationships that can really make a difference in your happiness.

All the best to you... and keep up the good work!

That's funny and so true, Gwyn!

I hope you are feeling better, EL, before TSM you'd have probably made yourself a few hot toddies for medicinal purposes

Nal on!

Well folks, after not being sick I promptly drank too much :/ but it wasn't the end of the world. A late (and unnecessarily late!) night and a large frozen pizza eaten but otherwise no harm done. I think about 12 units? Which brings my weekly total to 21.5. Not nearly as good as last week, but I did have 3 afs still, so not the end of the world. Disastrously hungover today though....so that's a negative. I just can't do more than 7 units in a night without wasting the entire next day :/

Hey, bud.

I am totally with you there regarding the severity of that nasty hangover the day after consuming 7 or more units. It's a bear.

One thing though, while you might be financially struggling a bit, your parents are loaded. It takes one to know one, kitten!

I think you are mighty courageous in your free-lancing! And I am envious of your great strides that you are accomplishing in TSM lately.

Great job,

Ketchikan1

Thanks for the support Ketch, Not entirely sure where you are getting this info about my parents lol? They are well off enough but not what I would consider super rich or anything...they have been wonderfully supportive of me during my unemployed times but I know it is a burden on them too.

Hi EL,

Glad you are feeling better from your sickness and sorry you are hung over a bit from this weekend. Anyway, it seems you are making great strides towards freedom. I wonder though what you thought about this weekend that triggered your overconsumption. Maybe habit? Overjoyed that you were'nt sick any longer? Stress. I'm not sure. Well, no harm done, your units are still far below mine. So congrats and keep up the good work.

Best,

Hi El,

I’m glad you’re feeling better and I hope the first 3 days of the week have been a lot better for you than this past Sunday. Anyways, because you have been so supportive I made a concerted effort to learn more about you and your quest to being “cured” / “regaining control”. Therefore, I read your introduction and the comments, then read the first three pages and last two pages on your weekly progress (sorry, but I didn’t read all 29 pages.. lol) and I wanted to congratulate you on your progress, dedication to the TSM process and I wish you continued success in all your relationships, professional endeavors, and I’m confident from what I’ve learned about you thus far that you will accomplish your goal of “regaining control” / being “cured” if you aren’t almost there already.

Keep up the good work and thank you for your support and encouragement!

BOO. Big drinking night last night, and I didn't mean for it to be, and I really felt the old pull. I am very unhappy about this, because I also drank too much this past Saturday. No blackouts, but definitely making friends with some questionable people and just bouncing around bars by myself well after my friends had left. I really can't do that anymore, it makes me feel terrible.
I think one thing very specifically triggered the drinking - I got a job offer (FINALLY), but it's not a very good offer, but I may be forced to accept it because of my current situation. In addition to being a less than stellar offer, I did some digging online and found loads of VERY VERY bad info on this company. Not just one or two disgruntled employees, but hundreds, all with very valid reasons for why it was a horrible environment to work in. So now I'm really wary about taking this job and absolutely hating my life and ironically...drinking too much because of it. One thing that really stood out for me in the comments is that several people claimed the company incited "substance abuse problems" and that the only people who were going to get promoted were the ones who drank the most with the bosses. That is VERY worrying.
So anyways, I think that was a pretty big trigger. But I'm still hurting today and disappointed with myself. Three AFs in a row, and then WHAM! back to old patterns.

Hi EL,

I have come across a number of these types of jobs/companies and worked at a few. The last was a major Satallite provider. I found the negative stuff online before interviewing, even had a friend of my wife that works there. Gave me the chance to grill them on it in the interview. As long as you haven't accepted yet it is not to late to ask some additional questions that may help make your decision. The ones I had taken were in desperate times, and were not worth it. If at all possible I would say keep looking. Good luck!