Hi all,

I introduced myself in a new member forum post last week, and wanted to start tracking my pre-Nal numbers here. Last week was a disaster, which further confirms I need to get my treatment started asap. Unfortunately, my doctor's office still doesn't have power due to Hurricane Irene, so my appointment this morning had to be cancelled. Damn you Irene! I hope everyone out there on the East Coast stayed safe.

Also, my shipment from River is still estimated at a week away. So while I can't make any progress yet, I'm gonna start tracking units anyways.

This week was brutal.

Monday - 8
Nothing really out of the ordinary here. 6-pack of 'gansett tall boys is a typical Monday night for me. Is it incorrect to track pints as 1.33 units? Just figured I would need to distinguish between 12-ounce cans and pints.

Tuesday - 16
Had a bit of a meltdown here due to some trouble getting over an ex-gf. They'll do that to you sometimes. 12-pack of Miller Lite, 3 pints of craft beer and some Sam Cooke as the soundtrack.

Wednesday - AF
Incredibly, I managed an AF day this week. However, as I noted in my introductory post, I can't sleep if I don't pass out, and this night was no exception.

Thursday - 8
Four double scotches went down in order to get some sleep before the weekend. I'm not a big scotch guy, and I wanted to get some booze that I don't have a taste for to discourage myself from inhaling units. This worked somewhat, but by the end of the weekend, the scotch was going down like water.

Friday - 17?
I had a little bit of trouble tracking on this night. A good buddy was in town from NYC, so a few of us met up in Boston and got after it. Things got a little blurry towards the end of the night, but I didn't completely hit the BOC. I was drinking all sorts of different stuff - shots, mixed drinks, beer.

Saturday - 24?
Oh man, this was a sh*tshow. A buddy and I went to a country concert, and I was crushing all day - in the morning, road sodas, tailgating, during the opener's set. All sorts of different stuff (scotch, whiskey, vodka, craft beer, sh*tty beer). I was in the BOC by probably 6 pm.

Apparently, after the co-headliner's set I stumbled off to pee and never returned. I was told later that I was found by security running around like Ocho Cinco on the New England Patriot's practice field. I do not even know where the practice field is, or how I managed to get on it. I was so hammered that instead of taking me to the drunk tank, I was sent to the hospital to sober up. I woke up *ss-naked having no idea where I was. The nurses had to explain to me why I was there. Sadly, this is the third time this has happened. I am a shameless drunk.

I eventually got home safe, but not only did I completely derail what would've probably been a great time, I'm went missing for about 6 hours. One of these days, I'm gonna run out of luck.

Sunday - 15
After my roommate picked up my dumb *ss, I immediately started crushing scotch while we watched Irene do her thing. Nothing like a hurricane to follow a sh*tstorm.

This week should be much more tame since I'll be travelling with family.

That said, total for pre-Nal week 1: 88

OOOOUF that is scary!!! Yes, we need to get you out of BOC immediately. You could come to some serious harm in the short-term, not just in the long-term with your liver. I cannot wait for you to get your hands on some nal. Would it be a possibility to not drink, or stay out of BOC until then? Or at least confine your drinking to a safe situation?
Oh btw...I love Sam Cooke drinking nights

It gets damn old, doesn't it? All of the blacked-out craziness and the unmanagable nonsense. I used to love when people told me what outrageous s*#t I pulled the night before... not.

It gets old.

And things almost have to end badly or they wouldn't end at all. Right? I loathe A.A. but I do agree with the saying, "I am sick and tired of being sick and tired."

Damn straight.

You are right where you should be Hesster. You are counting your units (to the best of your ability) and more importantly, you are recording your story and as embarrassing as it might be-- it is your truth and it's good to get it out especially on this forum where no one has escaped the hazy consequences of drunken oblivion.

Some stories on this site make your recent, little jaunt on the field look like a kid innocently eating animal crackers in a soothing kiddie pool. I am serious. Read some of the off the wall moments that many, if not all, of us have experienced!

I was a ravaged falling-down-blacking-out drunk when I began my journey March 1st. Life is much, much better today as I begin my 26th week on TSM.

You'll get there Hess!

Rooting for you from Alaska,

Ketchikan1

Holy cow, Hess! I want to take you home and mother you and keep you safe! I hope you don't mind my asking, but have you ever been diagnosed with hyperactivity or impulsively? you know, ADHD? Is your sober life chaotic or are you only a whirlwind when you drink? I hope your Naltrexone arrives quickly!!

To record your units, go to User Control Panel (top right of the page) then Profile then Edit Signature, you can enter your weekly unit numbers (on a daily basis if you like), that way you and everyone can see them at a glance in all your posts.

Keep writing.

Curi

This is probaly a silly question but what is BOC. Yeah the sooner you get your hands on nal the better. Im really looking forward to reading your progress. Untill then stay safe, the very last thing you need is to end up in jail or hospital when there is a cure in sight.

All the best

Mario

ElectraLou - This weekend should be pretty laid back since I'll be on the West Coast with some old family friends. For some strange reason the BOC doesn't exist out there. As for Sam Cooke, he's one of my favorites. One of the greatest voices of all time - smooth, but with juuuuust a hint of an edge. I've found that there is a lot of great music out there for drinking alone.

Ketchikan - I've been making my way through everyone's progress threads, and got through Susie's last night. Unreal. I can't wait to hear about this Sinclair baby. Great story.

Curi - I would describe myself as a generally mellow and laid-back person when I'm not deep into the surly sauce. Episodes like my Country Fest wind-sprint adventure are very out of character. My sober life has problems just like everyone else's, but I would consider my non-alcohol-related existence as very good.

Hi Mario - the BOC is an acronym for "Black Out City." It's a term some buddies of mine used in college.

"The BOC - if you don't know where you are, you're already here."

You all are excellent stewards on this forum. Thanks again for the advice and support.

-Hess

Hi all,

Here's the weekly recap for my second week of tracking pre-Nal units. Overall, I was actually pretty happy with how I managed the surly sauce. It started off a little bumpy, but I had an awesome trip out to Seattle, and I kept my sh*t together the entire time. I was visiting some family friends that love to throw back a few pints of the local stuff, but they never overdo it, so I just matched their pace and it worked out well. Good times.

Monday - 12.66

There were some residual effects of the Hurricane Irene/Country Fest sh*tstorm, so I was pounding scotch all day between bouts of unconsciousness. Bad day.

Tuesday - 18

For some reason I felt like getting after it when I got home from work. Crushed a 24 oz Twisted Tea while I was grilling outside in the beautiful weather (this will be a tough trigger to extinguish - tasty malt bevvies while grilling meats). A six-pack of Gansett tallboys went down during the Sox/Yanks game, and my roommate had some vodka left over from the weekend, so I couldn't let that go to waste. I think I was up until 2:30 watching a re-broadcast of the VMAs (loved the Kayne, Jay-Z "Otis" performance - just two good buddies trading verses and having a blast). This highlights another issue I have - once I get the surly train rolling, I have to finish all the alcohol in the house if I haven't passed out yet. It doesn't matter whose booze it is - I can't stop until it is gone.

Wednesday - AF

I was at my parents' house on Wed night, and my mom gets nervous when I drink around them, so I struggled through an AF night of no sleep.

Thursday - 8.33

Touched down on the West Coast early Thurs afternoon. I was pretty jet-lagged most of the day/night, so I didn't enter Crush Mode at any point. Nothing too notable here.

Friday - 11.66

This was a pretty mellow day spent checking out the downtown Seattle area with my sister. Again, nothing too notable here. I had a few craft brews while we played cards later that night, and we closed a local dive bar while pounding pitchers of Mack and Jack (delicious). I was buzzing by the end of the night, but that was about it. I felt pretty good about how this night went.

Saturday - 16

Sat started with a hike on Tiger Mountain. A buddy and I sipped at a brandy flask while dodging bikers and cowering in the shade when the sun got brutal. I felt like a grizzled mountain man, despite my questionable facial hair and lack of a burly frame. Most of my units here were spread out during a BBQ that stretched from about 6 pm til 2 am. Grilled some meats, watched the dogs harrass the sh*t out of each other, played with swords, got drinking games going, busted balls. My beruit/beer-pong shot has gotten terrible. I gotta tighten that sh*t up. Overall, I was really happy about how this day went since BBQs are also a big trigger for me.

Sunday - 10.33

Oh man, Sun was a great time. We crushed a few beers during a cruise from Lake Union in downtown Seattle out into the Puget Sound. Very cool experience, and the weather was beautiful (we had incredible weather all weekend). I tried to get as many Mack and Jack pints down as I could during dinner before my red-eye flight home, so most of my units came from there. I was a little tipsy when my buddies dropped me off at the airport, but overall this was a great day.

Total - 79

Some thoughts...

If I could spend the rest of my existence managing the sauce like I did while out in Seattle, I think I would be perfectly happy with that. I felt loose and friendly, but never came close to entering the BOC. Some of this might have to do with the fact that I was keeping an eye on my little sister, but when I think about it...I don't think I've ever gotten entirely sh*tfaced on the West Coast (and I've been traveling out there at least a few times a year since I graduated from college). There must be something about the Pacific.

Anyways, I came home early yesterday morning to a note from the USPS saying that my Nal from River had arrived. I picked it up this morning, so this will be my last pre-Nal week of tracking. I think 80-100 units is pretty accurate for me, so I'll use that as my baseline for comparison.

This will be a good week to gauge how I react to the medication, since I'm on-call and that usually means a lowkey week. I have a Fantasy Football draft tonight and a sixer of Rouge Mocha Porter, so the odyssey starts today.

I'm looking forward to derailing the surly train.

Enjoy the week.

-H

Good luck Hesster! We're all rooting for you.
EL

Thanks EL!

It's not my intention to post daily, but since last night was my first time drinking with Nal, I thought I should record it here as a milestone while the experience is still fresh in my mind.

It was a little strange...

As mentioned, I planned on throwing back a few last night because of my football draft (which I was under the impression started at 11:30 pm). I took a 50 mg dose of Nal at 9:30 pm and figured I'd start cracking beers (Rogue Mocha Porter...tasty) an hour later at 10:30 while cramming in some draft research.

My first impression of Nal was that the tablets taste kinda gross. Is this just the River variety, or do you guys find that the prescription brand goes down harsh too? Gross.

The first brewski was underway at 10:30 like I had planned, and instead of doing draft research, I hopped on iTunes to buy some tracks. At 11, I logged into the draft to see what the drafting order looked like, and half of my team had already been auto-drafted (apparently the freakin draft started at 10:30!!! None of my *sshole friends told me they changed the time!). My team sucked, so I figured I'd let the auto-draft program finish up it's fine work, and I dug in for the rest of the six-pack.

I didn't get any immediate side effects from the Nal. No nausea. No headache. No missing limbs. But something felt subtly different - I'm not sure if this was just my imagination, because I knew I had taken medication, and perhaps I was searching for something. The beers were going down pretty fast (I'd say at my normal pace), they still tasted great and I felt a little anxious when the last of the 6 was almost gone. If I was determined to keep drinking, I could've crushed the rest of the whiskey bottle that my roommate had leftover from the weekend, but instead I chugged two waters, brushed (and flossed!) my teeth, put on some Bon Iver and called it a night.

Now, at first glance this might seem like a positive first step - not continuing with the surly sauce despite alcohol still being in the house - but I have to remember that it was about 1:30 am at this point (so I was super sleepy) and I had to work this morning. Plus, a Katy Perry song managed to sneak into my iTunes purchases (hate when that happens)...so I was definitely buzzing a bit. I'd like to think this was just a first crack at extinguishing the "bored after work on a weeknight, crushing beers and downloading questionable music" trigger.

I also have a bit of a strange feeling today. Normally, when I'm a little hazy in the morning, all I can think about is how much I want to get home and fire it up again (especially when I know there's booze in the house...and ESPECIALLY when I know it's whiskey). But right now I could really care less about that bottle. I also have been 2/2 AF for the past two Wednesday's, so I think I'm gonna shoot for another one tonight.

We shall see.

Also, I noticed a method advocated by Nick and many others is to switch to light beer if liquor is your drink of choice, since brewskis take longer to drink and have a comparatively low abv...even to heavier beers. I am literally all over the place with what I like to drink (light beer, sh*tty beer, craft beer, whiskey [can't get enough of that stuff], rum - all in fairly equal volumes). Would you recommend switching to something else (i.e. wine, a different spirit)? Or should I stick to light beer since it's easy to track (although I should note that I will still drink it fast enough to get hammered...if I am in Crush Mode, light beers poured into a glass are going down in 2 mins, tops)?

I also decided to keep a sleeve of pills in my car (in case I'm out and about and some unforeseen situation with the sauce comes up) and in my desk (in case co-workers spring an impromtu Thirsty Thursday or Frosty Friday). Any other places I should definitely plan on stashing my goods?

Thanks for reading! Happy hump day.

-H

TSM works by extinguishing behavioral/psychological associations one by one. Drink what ever you normally drink, especially drink what you crave. Once the extinction process starts to be noticed, your taste moves among a range of beverages. If you typically drink whiskey, it is likely to be extinguished first. At some point, the switch to beer, even light beer, will seem quite easy. But not before you have run your gamut, from white wine to grand marnier (which is what I craved briefly). Don't force anything that induces the Alcohol Deprivation Effect (ADE). Answer cravings, and at some time you can make an effort to resist habit much more easily.