Ive been thinking since my last post and I have some cheek to doubt tsm for even a second. When I think back to how I would drink prior to nal there is absolutly no comparison. I would drink weekend and Monday mornings to get over my hangover and guilt. Ive gone from blacking out almost every time I drank to never blacking out. The guilt and anxiety of waking up not knowing what I did the night before or how I went to bed wondering if I had a row with hubby is now a thing of the past. Prior to nal I couldnt even look forward to a social occasion or party because I knew that I woould make an ass of myself. There were days I hated and dreaded the thought of going into work worried sick at what I had said or done the night before.With tsm Im one of the first to leave a party because I get to the point where I dont want to drink anymore and get tired of listening to other people drunk. This was a novel experience the first few times.

I remember mornings that I would stare at myself in the mirror hating myself for turning into the person I had become. I no longer rated myself as a mother and couldnt bear the thought of raising my only child as a drunken mother. No mother feels good when your child reminds you of something you have said or agreed to the night before. It was a truly horrible existence. Yes I quit for over 2 years but it always felt as if sobriety was built on shaky ground and I dreaded relapse. The white knuckling was another story alltogether even though I tried to convince myself that I wasnt whiteknuckling.

TSM has taken the fear of an alcoholic life away. I rarely drink enough to harm my physical or mental health. That is a miracle and nothing short of it. Sneaking a drink like I did the other night or drinking more than i would like to sometimes is a far cry from the days of pre nal. I guess the fact that I was annoyed at myself for sneaking A drink is a testament to how far nal has brought me. So nal on folks

Great News! It IS easy to forget how far we've come. the bold claims made in Eskapa's book don't come to fruition for many of us, but the benefits that most of us DO recieve are life changing in their own right. Nal has definitely changed me for the better. thanks for sharing mario

Absolutely, Mario, I hear you loud and clear - and your posted should be recommended reading for all doubting TSM!! The better we get, the more critical we are of our behaviour - but TSM helps us go so much further!

Hi Joe is good to see you back and its even better to see you still having a good deal of success with nal.

Thanks for that, I think you have hit the nail on the head Electralou, If I go any bit overboard now Im slapping myself. This weekend I had 3 glasses of wine on Friday night, a half a bottle of beer on Saturday night. We went out last night and I had 6 drinks in total but still was a bit critical of myself this morning. Pre nal I would have chalked down last night as a major success, in fact I would probaly have had 10 drinks each night of the weekend and drank at least one of the mornings to calm myself down.

Cant believe its over a month since I posted last here, ironically I go into the old quit site two or three times a week. I was a regular there for three years and got to know a lot of folk there. Sometimes it infuriates me when i see people who have difficulty holding a quit or serial relapsing and dissapearing. I want to shout about tsm but I dont, my thread is there and anyone thats interested can pm me.

Anyway TSM goes well. I feel well in controll of my drinking. Really its just a pattern at this stage, 3 glasses of wine on Friday and 3 glasses of wine on Sunday evening. Occasionally I will go to the pub with Hubby on Saturday nights but its rare and will become more so as he is a chef and his hotel is closing 6 weeks early for the winter so money will be tight. Im not worried, the mortgage will be paid and there will be food and heat. Luxuries will be few and Chrismas will be quiet, though we had allready planned a sun holiday and thats the middle of November.

I quit smoking early this month, I got hypnosis and hardly think of them at all. Im not using any patches or nicotine replacement of any sort so Im real happy with this. Please God it will continue. It really upset me to find out my 15 year old daughter started messing with smoking a few weeks ago. She has been grounded and is not getting any pocket money at all for the foreseeable future. She does have a boyfriend for a few months and though I was upset about that as well at the beginning Ive since met him and he is just a few months older than her and is a serious studious sort who was not in agreement with her smoking. We are allowing her meet him one evening a week for an hour and a half. Sometimes, actually most times I long for the baby days of singing and cuddling her to sleep when myself and her Dad were her whole life. It was certainly less worrysome.

Anyway none of that has anything to do with tsm so Ill stop rambling now and go and do some work

Cheers me dears

Careful Mario, don't restrict your daughter too much. You don't want to induce BDS in your daughter.....you know...."boyfriend deprivation syndrome".

Congrats on you supreme "in control".

You sound great, Mario, and huge congratulations on giving up smoking! Watch your weight, cigarettes speed up our metabolism so we tend to gain wait when we stop, not to mention that we tend to nibble more too.

I saw your post about a forum called wqd, is this it? http://wqd.netwarriors.org/forum.php

Did you see the thread about TSM?

Nal on!

Curi

Hi Mario,

Long gone are the days when you puked up in your handbag on the train

You are doing magnificently.. keep it going,

Andy x

Hi,

Yes Curious, yes Im Norma over there- dont know why I changed my user name. I get annoyed when they dis nal there so I tend to just visit to keep up with the people I know for years there. I often get pms though about tsm and do my best to help.

Dear Mario,
Congrats on your continued success! I hope that all continues to go well. 6 glasses of wine over a weekend is amazing! I hope to be there some day soon.