I did not want to leave my last post hanging out there in case there is someone new reading it. The very next morning we talked and we both decided that he is different on vodka than he is with beer. In fact he says he went directly to bed that night to avaoid any argument. He said that he dumpe the remainder of the vodka out...no more vodka....ha ha

This week he was out of town (he travels with his job) and he told me for the first time he craved vodka...he has always denied cravings but he said that he had one real bad. I asked what he was going to do and he told me that he had bought a bottle and had it in his room. I asked if he had taken his pill and he assured me he had.

The next day he came home with the rest of the bottle...very little was gone. He said that he had the drink and one was enough....so I asked if beer was soemthing he could drink instead of the vodka and he told me no....so I guess he will continue to drink vodka but usually one drink is enough (1 drink is probably 6 units?) plus 2-3 beers.

I ask him if he feels any different and he immediately says yes....he feel like he has some control, he sleeps better and his confidence is returning. A bonus is that his knees don't hurt anymore....a side effect of the NAL?

We get along better and if someone had told me last November when the police were here because he was out of control that we would be talking to each other with mutual respect and his drinking be where it is I would not beleive it.

I know that this is probably the honeymoon period but I am enjoying it while it lasts. He does not want to hear that itprobably won't last and he eants to be "cured" in 3 months. When I tell him that it may take longer he gets a little upset because he wants "immediate gratification"...anyone here ever heard of that before? ;0)

Lynn

It sounds like the nal is definitely working for him, and that's great. It is going to get difficult when he is frustrated about the roller coaster of TSM and (likely) isn't cured at the three month point. So I guess the only thing you can do is be prepared for that - though like you said, talking about it with himnow may just annoy him. Hopefully you guys will get through this together!
EL

There is virtually NO CHANCE of a three-month cure. He needs to be thinking 6-12 months or he's setting himself up for disappointment.

When I first discovered TSM...I had to sell it to him....he was so down on himself. He had been put on antidepressant becasue he was so down. He had no self confidence and had talked about wanting to die. I remeber the night I told him about it....he laid his head in my lap and said that he would try anything to stop this.

He has been being "treated" since November and nothing had been working. I think if I had told him that night it might take as much as a year before he sees results he would have given up. So I told him that people usually start to see/feel results in 3 months and they continue to improve over the next 3 years. He is shooting for 3 months and I tell him almost daily that some people take longer....

I hurt for him, and I want to encourage him and so I we go into his 3rd week tomorrow and I think the honey moon phase has passed...he gets so disappointed in himself and goes right to bed because he does not want me to see him if he has had too much to drink and I don't want the girls seeing him like that so it is best that he do go to bed. The problem is we miss him....he works, he drinks, he sleeps....and we have already missed out on so much we don;t want to have to give up anymore time than we have to.

Lynn

It's totally understandable why you would tell him 3 months is possible, under the circumstances. And there is a chance he'll see some improvement at 3 months. You should just keep warning him that 3 months is for younger people who only drink 30 a week or so; for older people who drink more, it's more like 6 months to a year. I say this to minimize his disappointment when he's not cured at 3 months and to make sure he knows that this was predicted/expected by people who have been there/done that. BUT it's not all or nothing. Hopefully he'll see continued improvement.

You are a great partner. Hang in there. This will almost certainly work if he keeps taking the pill, I'm confident of it.

My best,

Nick

Thanks Nick....we had a talk about this and he was a little bummed about the 6 months to a year before being in control but he is so happy with the way he is feeling now that I think that he doesn't see it as too overwhelming. He and I are doing so much better and the whole family is doing better because we are all in the same page....Dad is working on getting better and he is being honest about his drinking and that in itself is nice...the lying was very destructive to our marriage and I think when he was sneaking and drinking he was drinking was more than he is now and so he was getting pretty drunk...pretty scary drunk.

So he knows that he will probably see some changes in 3 months but not be cured...and so we are setting our sights on 8 months...around Valentines Day. I joke with him that maybe by then he will have an AF day. See when he takes his Nal he doesn't want to do anything that he really enjoys because he doesn't want to loose interest in it.....and so it has been pretty G rated around here if you get my drift....

But for now we will Nal 0n!

Lynn

Lynn, I know others have posted about this, but I don't think there's much risk of losing interest in other "fun" activities while taking Nal. I was worried about that myself, but I've been taking Nal every day for 5 months now and I don't think my attitude towards exercise or sex has changed any (although some people have reported weight loss - now I could definitely use some of that, but I only lost my appetite in the first week when I had a few side effects).

Best of luck to you and your husband!

You cannot extinguish a sex drive, only learned behaviors. I challenge any PhD or MD to prove me wrong on this point. Have sex and don't worry about extinguishing anything. He might actually enjoy it more if he is actually aware of what's going on.