I'll PM you about mwo

Hey Illuminae,

Glad to hear the addition of Topamax is helping! I loved that you actually wanted WATER because you were THIRSTY. Actually thirsty.

Your travel life sounds like my old travel life (before kids.) I commuted between NYC and NoCal for a few years, made the United 1K Club (100,000 miles in a year) and depended on my first class upgrades to get lots of free drinks in from coast to coast. I was always hammered by the time I got home for the weekend (fortunately, I had a ride home!)

I also tried MWO many years ago. I got all the CDs and tried the supplements, but never got a script for Topamax. It was not nearly as well accepted then, so I was afraid. If TSM does not end up working well enough for me, I will probably try MWO again.

Have a great week, and congratulations again!

YG

Normally when eating out my husband and I almost always order a bottle of wine. Last night we went out to dinner and I truly did not feel like drinking. I've felt like that before recently, but then out of habit and not wanting to raise attention with him, we go ahead and order that bottle. Many times lately though when I do feel like that I will just let him drink a lot more of it. (god it's an amazing change from when I would account for who got every drop!) The Difference last night was that we went to this restaurant where we don't typically order wine. it's a chinese restaurant so the wine is not very good and surprisingly they have these amazing Mai Tais that my husband loves and I usually get one or two as well. So when he ordered his drink I just said I'd have water and hot tea. I did drink wine later at home but it reduced my overall amount of drinks for the day and it felt so good to listen to my mind/body and not drink when I really didn't feel like it. I guess this might not sound like such a big deal but it really felt like overcoming a hurdle to me. In fact, now that I think about it, we were at that exact same restaurant one night when I was wrestling with whether to drink or not and I remember i was thinking that I might not get a drink and the dang waiter knew us so well he said "two Mai Tais?" and instead of saying no, I was just like, well, ok.

And you know what else? Recently I noticed another eating out pattern changing for me. When eating out at 'fancier' restaurants on a weekend, we'd usually have a mixed drink first, then the bottle of wine, and sometimes then an after dinner drink too. Twice recently I said no to the before dinner mixed drink when my husband was having one and I had absolutely no thought for the after dinner cocktail. I think something is working here...

It's these subtle changes that allow TSM to sneak up on you. It definitely sounds like you've turned a corner just by looking at your new behavior. Thanks for continuing to post your experiences with TSM and Topamax. Your travel experience reminded me so much of my own recent travel.

I think something's working here too!!! go figure eh? You take your Nal, drink, have patience, and guess what? It works!

Isn't this a wonderful thing? Imagine all those sad folks who will drag themselves out to a meeting tonight? They'll all sit around and talk about drinking but not be able to have one because of the fear of sliding down the rabbit hole.

Not us. We're in control (or getting there) and will drink, or not drink, using our minds instead of our habit/addiction to make the decision.

Truly a wonderful thing. Illuminae you are doing so well!!

wow Saint V, I just read your update and absolutely, very similar as far as the travel. I jealous though, your units are lower than mine, you're able to not finish a bottle and have AF days easier than me. I still feel good about my progress overall though.

I hope I'm not being presumptuous here by quoting this, but I had a very similar experience a couple of weekends ago when I was out to dinner with my fusband (my "fake" husband, aka boyfriend of 6 yrs) at a fancy French restaurant. Not only did I club soda my way through the before dinner mixed drink, but I also sipped & passed (my half finished glasses of wine) to him throughout dinner It was so not a big deal at the time, but in retrospection was soooo exciting for me because I always used to be the pit bull at dinner making sure I got my share of the bottle and also grabbing the bottle to top off everyone's glasses with ridiculous pours so we'd have to order a new one
Something is definitely working here!

Well, today marks my one year anniversary on TSM. Can't say I can declare as decisive a victory as Crown86, but feeling pretty in control and doing well. Haven't been checking in as much lately and do owe a much better update. Hope everyone is doing good!!!!

Ended up being a pretty good Anniversary evening. The Thanksgiving holiday week/weekenend found me happy and busy, but kind of high on drinking units relatively speaking - not like in the pre-rehab (it was my 2 year anniversary from that) or pre-TSM days. I still tend to do that when I don't have to work and that's pure habit. Staying up late and finishing off the bottle of wine for no other reason than it's there.

Last night found me pretty tired and I experienced one of those great unexpected times when I just forgot about drinking. I was nodding off in front of the TV and I Called it quits at 10pm on the nose, poured the remainder of my wine back in the bottle and went to bed.

I feel great today!

Since starting the combined TSM/MWO I've also lost some weight and kept it off so that is making me feel good. I'm still pissed off at my gym that has not been calling me back about setting up the training sessions I'm interested in. I'm going to call the fricking manager. Don't they want my business?!!!!
My hubby has actually started his diet so I've been very good at supporting him in his efforts.

Christmas shopping almost done and we're getting ready to go to Iowa for the holidays (where his family is from) OH BRRRR!!!!! Not sure this California girl is ready for that!

Hope you all are having a wonderful day!

Had a really great day celebrating my daughter's 7th birthday. Very busy running around getting things together for it and also other pre-christmas stuff. Took her, my son and 3 of her friends to a fantastic show to celebrate the birthday - the Radio city Music Hall Rockettes. It was really fun. Great part - an event like that at an arena - I would have been looking for the booze stand. This time, no question, i did not care, did not look for it and knew I was driving other people's daughters. Had a blast and the thought did not even occur to me.

Sunday we're having my Son's birthday party (I know how crazy that my kids' b-day's are that close together) and we're doing a skateboarding theme. REally looking forward to that too. Hope the good weather holds out!

Hope everyone is doing well.