sj,
welcome back to the board!
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Hope you get over that cold. as far as TSM, you're looking good. glad you're back

Thanks for the welcome back folks! Looking forward to finishing my first month. A few things I've learned over the past couple of weeks:
1. My old 3 bottles of wine in one evening habit is DONE for now. I tried it once in week 3 and again on Day 1 of Week 4, and was terribly hungover for days 2+ days afterwards. Now that I'm taking the NAL from doctor's prescription instead of Nodict for River I've noticed a difference. On the Nodict I feel like I had fewer cravings but it was also my honeymoon week so that may have been a factor. On weeks 2 and 3 I had a couple of nights where I was up until 5, 6 am drinking alone in my apartment watching tv shows on the internet which is an old old habit. Also different quality of hangovers, feel much worse having drank much less and it's a big deterrent to drinking that amount no matter now many hours it's spread out over.
2. Prior to TSM, my entire life revolved around alcohol on a daily basis. I I wasn't drunk or in the process of getting drunk, I was planning my day around when I could start drinking preferably as early as possible. I rarely think about alcohol now--I've been following a schedule where I drink Sun, Tues, & Thurs nights (maybe a Fri or Sat evening depending on whether or not I'm traveling for work). 2 bottles of wine is generally my maximum and I look forward to being able to reduce that. No more daytime drinking, even when I'm lounging around the house doing nothing. I've forgotten what cravings feel like; as much as I was obsessed with alcohol before I just don't really think about it all that much now. My next goal is to start to reintroduce exercise into my routine (I used to be a daily workout fiend & in great shape; I currently have over 100 pounds to lose) when I don't have NAL in my system. I think my depression will improve when I start to feel and look better physically. I don't drink socially because I don't go out because I feel like an obese beast. But I'd like to eventually rediscover my old relationship with alcohol which is when I only drank socially (never alone) and almost always in moderation

I'm going to spend the next couple of days catching up with everyone elses's posts. I've missed checking in and I'm excited to read about everyone's progress over the past couple of weeks. My boyfriend & I are heading to the Sanity Rally in Washington, D.C. this weekend so I'm looking forward to an AL free and sane Fri & Sat night!

Sounds like you're doing well, St. Jude. I am at a similar stage to you, and I have also started to exercise. You should try running, and if possible do it somewhere nice and green for extra enjoyment.

One Month Anniversary Celebration!
Past week has been interesting. I would have had 4 AL free days, but I went to the Rally to Restore Sanity in Washington, DC this weekend, and had the personal opportunity to have my sanity restored. First of all, this is not an event I would have normally considered attending. I hate being out in public these days unless I absolutely have to because I feel like a obese beast. I know it's important to start doing fun things in my life that aren't centered around solitary drinking, so on a whim I booked a hotel room on my birthday in Sept for the Stewart/Colbert rally. I somehow agreed to get my antisocial (for different reasons) boyfriend to come with me, so Friday we found ourselves driving 7+ hours to Washington, DC. At that point I was 42 units for the week--3 bottles Sunday with a HORRIBLE hangover Monday, 2 bottles Tues&Thurs, AF Mon&Wed. Plan wasn't to drink Fri or Sat because I haven't drank in front of boyfriend in a year, he drinks very rarely. My drinking is a touchy subject between us (he know I had been doing it secretly) and I only recently shared TSM with him. Fri night we had dinner in our hotel, I'd taken NAL just in case and when I arrived at restaurant for dinner after a shower, he had ordered a scotch. I ordered a glass of wine with dinner as did he and all was relaxed and comfortably good. I noticed he was watching me to see how I'd behave on NAL (his first time seeing me drink on it) but I didn't feel any effects from the wine and had no cravings for more, I even gave him the rest of my glass. Sat night we went to a very fancy French restaurant in Old Town Alexandria, VA (La Bergerie). I hadn't planned on drinking, no cravings but I took a "just in case" NAL. We ordered a tasting dinner that came with wine. I ended up giving him at least half of my wine--I enjoyed "tasting" it but beyond that had no urge to drink any more. I couldn't taste the complexities of the wine which I'm normally great at but when you're not good at it, especially with French wine, it can taste like dog manure. Plus we weren't driving so boyfriend was happy to get more wine since dinner for two cost almost $300! (we are not wealthy). So consumed slightly less than one glass of wine on each Fri & Sat night & by law they measure 6 oz. portions in D.C. so to be generous I'm counting each night as one glass of wine.
I'd have to say the drinking highlight of the week was to be able to share my wine at dinner so effortlessly and happily without obsessing over me consuming as much as possible prior to dinner and getting more throughout the evening to gulp in secrecy.
Another highlight was Sanity Rally in DC--it was a spectacular event and so humbling to be around people spewing humor and kindness instead of hatred and vitriol. I hope this spreads as a message to the world-can't we all just love each other?

St. Jude your numbers are looking good but more importantly your weekend dining experiences where you drank like someone who doesn't care about AL was impressive. You are making great progress especially with AF days. Nice going. Glad you're back and posting.

Feeling very much like a wino this week so far-14 units on Sunday, 7 on Monday, 18 on Tuesday (stayed up til 4 am watching election results come in with growing horror). Not sure if it's because I'm emotional about the elections or what is going on. Also, the last time I had 3 bottles of wine in a night (my first or second week of TSM) I was sick as a dog for 2 days afterwards. Felt surprisingly OK this morning with very little sleep. Trying not get down on myself.

Don't worry St. J, this is the roller coaster in action. I find this often happens after a really successful time like you just had. And the election was probably a trigger, obsessive type event, getting sucked into watching the results, staying up late, so what do you do, keep sucking down wine. And I also have hit or miss reactions too as far as hangovers. You're fine, keep on at it. And hey, I bet your boyfriend was real proud of you!

St Jude,

I agree. Hang in there. My 5th week was my worst week on TSM. I too find that when I've gone through a successful time then my alkie self kicks in for a few days. It can be frustrating but is very normal. Just keep taking nal before you drink and stay safe

i'd say the elections, were a major trigger for you, best to just drink through triggers. you will settle back down to lower numbers again. stay the course
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