spectacular!!!
enjoy every bit of it.
path

Pacificman, you are doing great. Fantastic progress. It's amazing to be one of the sober people at a party now isn't it.

Read through the entire thread. Interesting read. Glad to hear of your progress. Keep up the good work!

The drinking journal continues.

10/26 Had a small glass of saki with dinner. I tasted like water, and I wondered why I was wasting money on it.

10/27 My biggest drinking night in 2 months. started out with 4 beers in an hour at Fridays. Felt like I was kind of forcing them, but I was in a partying mood, and to be honest I didnt want to get sleepy and "not want to drink". Went on to have a great night and drink in excess of 25 units. Was fairly drunk, but did not loose control, blackout or get sick. Also made sure to eat something.
Next day, had a couple drinks at the pool. Normally this would be a full on day to mask the pain. Would then lead to a 3 day hangover that felt like a post operative. Im not disappointed in the extra drinking, as long as it doesn't continue every weekend. I feel that I hit it just about as hard as I wanted, and not loose complete control.

I definitely feel as though I am loosing tolerance to alcohol as the time goes by and I drink less. Another thing I noticed when I thought about it, is that I havent done any shots. Just no desire. Previously, Id drink anything put in front of me.

On a side note, Karen at River went out of her way to help me with a messed up delivery. I use All Day as well, but I thought I would mention it.

Hi Pacificman! I've just read your posts, and congrats for sticking with the program. As you can already see changes I guess you're on your way to good things over the next months.

You seem to be able to take a look at yourself 'from outside' - fun eh? This sounds so good, as your behaviour is changing because your body is no longer bloto - with no thinking possible!

That's what I noticed first - that mind clearing, that feeling of being able to observe what I was doing. Over months I was able to put in place some stuff so that I could have alcohol free days (daily drinker).

So glad you joined up! Come spring you will look back on these weeks and be amazed at how different things were over time.

That is part of it. My last night out with the 4 beers in the first hour, and 25+ units is the type of night I need to truly extinguish. This is what it is all about for me. As I mentioned before, multiple Alcohol free days for me are no problem at all.

I see the progress, the overall reduction of big nights, the control slowly returning, and of course the increase in productive days following those nights out.

Hangovers also now seem to have a "reminding effect" to not drink so much. Previously, I could care less how I would feel the next day. It was all about getting more booze in the bloodstream now.

You sound quite like me. I too can go several days without drinking, and I too have difficulty drinking beers sometimes now. But also, I have my big nights, and those 5% (black swans) are the nights that cause 90% of the distress and damage. Perhaps because they constitute such a small proportion of the nights, maybe they'll take longer to extinguish. Maybe not. Who knows.

PacMan-you mentioned earlier the "reminding effects" of hangovers and I totally agree with that! I find it very hard to drink more than one-two days in a row now (and I was a pre-TSM daily heavy drinker). It's like it takes my body and mind a lot longer to shake off the effects of the alcohol and I don't turn to it as the hair of the dog as I used to

Tue 11/2 Had 1.5 glasses of wine. Couldn't finish the second. Once again it made me very thristy.
Wed. 11/3 Went to my favorite pub again. Planned to hit it and go out for the night. Slowly paced the rum and diet cokes, even had to pour out some because they were too watered down from the ice. Inexplicably just decided to go home after 2 hours. Mixed 2 giant mojitos up at home for the wife and myself. Drank 4 sips and left the whole damn thing. Not tired at all, just not wanting to drink for no reason.

These results are less of a surprise now, and although they are desired, it is not forced. I had complete free will to go out and keep going, but simply made a logical decision not to. Almost a flip of the coin feeling, but it was as if the alcohol was any drink, and I simply "just wasn't thirsty".

I have been in that same exact situation at that same bar maybe 200 times in the last 10 years. 190 of them turned into a blackout, expensive drink-a-thon with a 4 day hangover.

PacMan said not today.

Gobble up that NAL Pacman. You are doing fantastic. TSM is really working for you. When this stuff works it really works. Looking forward to following your progress.