well, once again the progress report does not look much like progress as i posted elsewhere, the strange thing is that it feels like i have been making an effort to reduce, slow down, wait between beers, but when i count the units it's the same as it ever was, to quote david byrne. hard to understand the discrepancy between perception and reality. the only thing i can think of is that it's sort of like dieting. for me whenever i would "diet" i suddenly became so focused on food that i instantly felt deprived, as if it had been weeks since i last had dessert, when it had only been last night . now i find that i don't diet, my weight is fine and the more i forget about food the easier it is to maintain my weight. perhaps the same thing is happening here? more thinking about units leads to more units??

this week i have switched to naltima from nodict (both nal brands). next week i will up to 100 mgs, after being on 75 for 2+ weeks. if i keep throwing things against the wall perhaps something will eventually stick?

i may just be battling habit. after years of staying home and drinking, i realize that i don't have much going to distract me from my "routine". i don't know if my recent isolation is about circumstances (not a big social group here yet) or due to al, (don't they say isolating is a classic alcoholic pattern?), or a combination of the two. anyway, i'm still hoping for the easy, take the pill and get things to change, but am pretty sure it's going to take more than that for me to get there. otherwise i think i would have seen SOME reduction in units. or, perhaps it's just not long enough yet...?

as always, even though i am not the most active participant here, i am here a lot, and really appreciate everyone's post's and participation. if anyone has any ideas for me i am all ears!

thanks all! looking forward to seeing your progress on this bumpy road,
path

Hey Path,

I realized I haven't posted on your thread (thanks for IM Message).

Habit Vs. Craving has been discussed quite a bit on this board. I for one think thats where I am at actually right now (habit). As a TSMer for over a year, and as you k\now currently out, I've not had an increase in cravings per se yet (Although that hankering might be hitting a LITTLE harder but that could just be the psychology of no NAL speaking and me talking myself into it) and I do believe that my neural pathways have shrunken. As well, I think my tolerance has diminished. I had 11 units yesterday yes, but over 4-5 hours,

Thanks again for everything. Take care, Jim

Hi Path,

I totally relate to your experience with dieting. Same for me, whenever I try to diet, I get obsessed with food and eat more. If I don't think about it, I have really healthy eating habits and do fine. For me, that last 5-10lbs I want to lose just has to be the AL, 3500+ extra, empty calories a week add up!

And I agree about isolation, I have done that too ... well, as much as I can being married with kids. I have cut myself off from a lot of extra social contact, mostly because I have been too tired and sick to maintain relationships. And it is really easy to fall into that habit of drinking every night, when you home alone and in that routine. I really do think half the battle here is habit. Nal can take care of the unconscious neural pathways, but then there is human nature and habit. I am struggling with that as well.

So with all that said, maybe you are right. Focusing on units + being isolated without other outlets certainly could contribute. Have you tried taking an AF night here and there to see how it goes? It might be easier than you think, and then they might start to happen more naturally. And can you think of other interests to pursue in the evening, some good distractions? Maybe a list of books you have wanted to read, or movies you've wanted to rent? I am finding that the more I focus on all the things I have been wanting to do, and couldn't (because I was too drunk or hungover), the more I want to avoid feeling terrible the next day. That makes it easier to not start drinking in the first place.

Also, the 100mg range seemed to make a difference for me, so maybe that will be the key for you too.

Anyway, I know we started around the same time and I am really pulling for you. Hang in there and keep posting. Hopefully you will turn that corner soon!

Hugs, YG

wk 18 completed, 64 units. this actually is not bad as i attended a big music festival two days this week. for me that used to mean starting the beers at noon and going through til bedtime, typically 15+ units. this week i was able to keep my normal nights to 8 and festival days to 11 and 12. did take a bit of effort, but mostly i was afraid of the potentially brutal nal hangover, and that made it easier. i have been noticing that lots of folks here are getting motivated by the lack of hangovers now that their al consumption is reduced. i am the opposite, i never got hungover before, but have to watch out these days to avoid the horrible nal hangovers. the other pleasant surprise is that i was able to have fun while being basically sober, usually i think i need to be a bit buzzed to really enjoy myself.
i'm on day 2 of 100 mgs, and am really hoping it will make a difference. i am also planning on altering my schedule and start adding some exercise time in the early evening so that i delay my first drink. i'm sure yoga girl is right, i need to find things to do besides having the next one, once i do i'm sure it will help.
thanks again everyone,
so glad so many of you are seeing real progress!
path

I hope the 100mg works out for you path. Sounds like you are reaping some benefits of Nal. one thing a lot of us noticed even before te units started really going down was a level of control we had never seen before. A lack of getting totally shitcanned if you will. I've noticed I act better, and drink less, but even on the nights when I've drunk toom uch, I still act way better than I used to. that switch inside me doesn't get flipped like it used to

Hope the 100mg is helping! The book is pretty clear about engaging in endorphin-boosting activity when there's no NAL in your system. I live alone & almost always drink alone, so I can identify with drinking out of boredom and habit. I don't own a TV, so when my internet is down (as it was last night, I found myself polishing off two bottles even though I wasn't really craving the wine) I need to find an alternate activity to drinking. Wish I could have sex on demand, but exercise is probably a better alternative and is also likely to lead to more and better sex

week 19, 46 beers. finally a week with lower numbers! i just wish i knew why. not only did i start on 100 mgs this week, but i also had a head cold for most of the week. i didn't feel bad really, (except i am surprised that my nose hasn't been blown off my face by now, ), i just didn't feel like drinking as much... because of nal or the bug?? i don't know.
since a lot of extra exercise doesn't appeal with a stuffy nose, i have found some volunteer work to do a few days this coming week so that i won't get home until 7:00 thus delaying my start time by about 2 hours. that should help my numbers, and hopefully begin to break my longstanding habit.
i did have one other bit of news on the habit front. yesterday i really wanted a beer in the early afternoon, so i took my nal and did. what was different was that instead of following that one with the second and on until evening, i didn't have my second until about 4 hours later. a small change i know, but still significant i think. i also normally would have been worried that the 7 beers in the fridge wouldn't last til the end of the night, but yesterday i had no worries at all, i thought i will either drink them all or have one or two left over. new thoughts for me.
thanks for the comments and encouragement! keep posting everyone, i love seeing the progress
with fingers crossed,
path

ps. joe i wish i could say that i am having more control these days, but i have never been one for getting out of hand while drinking, so my experience now is pretty much the same as before. hopefully that will be changing soon to a feeling of beers being optional not mandatory.

week 20
second week on 100 mgs. 47 units. i still felt like i had a cold or bad allergies, but didn't feel bad enough to have it effect my desire to drink. what did make a difference this week was that a few days i scheduled things so that i was not free to open a beer at 5 or 6. those days when my start time was 7-8 pm i was really surprised that i was not chomping at the bit, or getting those first beers down fast to make up for starting late. instead, it felt totally normal to only have 4 or 5 beers in an evening. one day i had four and a half and felt that was enough and stopped . it was really the first glimpse i've had that things could in fact be changing. i was amazed at what relief i felt thinking that i could really be heading toward normal levels. most of the time i am the only one noticing how much i drink, but the holidays are coming up, and i realized that i would be so relieved to be able to buy a 6 pack for an evening instead of a 12 pack while staying with friends or family, as none of them are heavy drinkers. having said that, my last two evenings were 8 each, so clearly, i have more work to do to get 6 or fewer to be my new norm.

this week i also noticed craving sweets big time, something that i experienced in the past when i quit drinking. grrrrrr! perhaps nal can extinguish sugar too? here's hoping. i guess it's time for me to reread the potatoes not prozac book, as it deals with the sugar addiction issue.

so, my goal for the coming week is 6 units a day. i am planning on switching to buying 1 six pack at a time which will make it harder to go over that limit. i have volunteer work a couple days, and hopefully i will begin feeling better so i can add some early evening exercise. wish me luck, and as always i'm all ears if you have any suggestions for me. thanks!

keep up the great work everyone,
path

Hey Path, nice work! Looking at your numbers, looks like a real dip over the last two weeks on the 100mg. 60's, 60's, 40's, 40's. Nice.

the six pack thing is a good goal too. I do the same with buying just one bottle of wine. There's other liquor in the house for my husband and that doesn't usually pose a problem for me anymore.

Path!!! Fantastic! You are going through what I think is typical. One day, or several days in a week you 'seem' to drink less. You just don't 'seem' to want that 5th beer.- well that's how it starts!!! Then you'll go back to drinking more - then down you go again - then up, then down. But those who have tracked with graphs etc. almost always see a downward shift - even with some upticks. Down, down, down. Then once you really feel this trend you can start adding some tricks for yourself - like you are already doing with the volunteering. One of these days you'll come home at 8 and be tired and just have a quick supper and go to bed without remembering that you have not had a beer - I'm sure it's coming.

At as you're only at week 19 or 20 you are just beginning the 'maybe this is working' weeks.

Don't be discouraged - it IS working.