Keep posting -- this information is invaluable. We've said it often: TSM is a roller coaster ride. Your ride appears to be on the extreme end but the overall improvement in your quality of life is very encouraging. You are a great spouse.

My best,

Nick

Goodness, "helpful" - not sure where to start. So much positive about where your wife is and so much up in the air about her prospects. It's a long road getting healthy no matter what fork you are taking...best of luck from here. Stand by yo gal & I will keep my fingers crossed for you both. Chances are it will work - if she takes it one hour before EVERY DAY!! Or at least when drinking is in the picture...

You are a good man for being behind her - I applaud you & hope it all works out.

XO

You're a good man helpful, and I know that one day when your wife is free for AL she will give back to you what you have given to her. The road ahead is much brighter.


corkit

Checking in again to update my wife's progress on TSM. As I write this it seems somewhat unbeleivable when I think back and remember how out of control my wife's life (and mine) was because of alcohol. It has been about 2 months since I last posted and it has been a pretty good two months. At the start of these last two months there was two bad weekends where my wife drank from Friday night to Sunday night but she got up on Monday and went to work and started nal again. Since then, no episodes of drunkeness even though she drank on the weekends with me. During her bad weekends, I don't think she took her nal while she was drinking but since then she has faithfully taken nal before drinking and the last month or so has been great. Again, this isn't an unqualified success unless you look at where she was before starting TSM or nal last August. I read some of Ben's posts and they really hit home. The detox, hospital, ER's, rehab, etc were all too real for my wife prior to last August. With the help of nal, she has had some relapses, where I'm pretty sure she doesn't take nal, but nothing like what the decade before nal was like. We are coming up to nine months on nal and TSM and although there has been some slips, there have been no visits to detox, ER, rehab or anything else. She has only missed work because of drinking during a bad week after the holidays, which again is a welcome departure from history.
Last week we were on vacation and we drank alcohol everyday. Not drunk once and never dealt with cravings or sneaking liquor as she took nal faithfully before drinking. If someone told me a year ago that my wife could regain her ability to drink, I would have told them they were insane. For my wife, and I have said this before, nal has been a lifesaver. As for me, I think I have my sanity back, although some may disagree! I regularly check in this site and follow the stories of those who post. I am inspired by those who nal has helped, as it has helped my wife and me, although I've never taken a pill.

You and your wife are an inspiration for us all. Thanks for your continued posts.

Wishing you continued success and happiness.

My best,

Nick

Checking in after one year of TSM for my wife. The good news is that in the previous year there have been no emergency rooms, detox visits, rehab or any other craziness that alcohol had caused, in the past year. There have been a few times where my wife has had a few days of drunkeness and stopped taking nal before drinking but the intensity of these "slips" is dramatically reduced and she is able to right herself by going back to nal. After reading many posts on this site I acknowledge that my wife's problem with alcohol is a lot worse than most but nal and TSM have helped immensely. I don't consider it a cure for her but look at it as a harm reduction strategy that has allowed her, for the most part, to be able to drink socially and have control over alcohol. This has not been the case for a long time. The fact that there have been no real blowouts in the past year on TSM is a testament to how it works to stop the cravings and gave my wife a second chance at life. Seriously, the way she was headed before TSM and nal was an early death and that is not embellishment. At her doctors appointment last week, she leveled with her doctor about using nal only when she was going to drink. She printed out info from the net on TSM and handed it to him. Even though he is connected with a drug and alcohol treatment center, he said he had never heard of TSM. He originally wrote the script for nal a year ago with the directions to use daily. We had already decided to try TSM and used nal only before drinking. He was fine with her decision and told her that she "has been around the block" with alcohol told her that in his experience some alcoholics can return to drinking alcohol and some can't. I hope that he reads the literature and offers TSM to other people with alcohol problems who are failing at traditional methods. This site and the stories that I have read have been a great help to me and my wife. I will continue to give periodic updates with the thought of helping others in their effort to overcome a problem with alcohol.

Hi Helpful Spouse, I am also the spouse to the heavy drinker, Mr. Spitfire. He started TSM the end of April this year, and things have been really good for us. I never would have thought that such a treatment was available, and Mr. Spitfire was the kind of person who would NEVER consider AA or any other abstinence method, he simply would not be able to abstain, end of story.

He is still an every day drinker, but alot different than the old days. For me too, I would worry on my way home from work each day, who am I going to find when I get there? He would be home a couple of hours before me, and pounding back the drinks before I got home.

That has changed dramatically. He still has a couple of drinks before I get home, but only a FEW not 8-10 beers like he would in the old days.

We can now go out to the local pub and socialize a bit and not have to worry about him getting fallen down drunk. I think you were right on the money when you said that just knowing you don't have to abstain, takes away the worry. Take the pill, then drink.

He recently went to his doc and told him that alot of days now, he just doesn't feel like drinking and is kind of forcing himself to do it. The Doc says NOT to stop drinking now, he feels that it's important he keep on drinking and take the Nal. So that is what he is doing.

He has not had an AF day yet, but I'm not fretting about it. I know that someday, he will wake up and say "you know, I'm not gonna drink today". I know that day will come, it's just a matter of when.

He takes his pill faithfully everyday. At the beginning, I used to ask him "did you take your pill today?" Well that just PO'd him so I've stopped doing that. He promised me way back at the beginning, that he will take it each and everyday, and that he is committed to this treatment, and so that is what he is doing.

We only had one episode recently where he was noticably "drunk" but I think it was because he was drinking on an empty stomach and it was only the one time. He has really regained alot of control in his life and feels happy with the progress he is making.

Your story is very inspirational. I feel this is a miracle treatment, and yes, it takes time, especially if they were long-time drinkers. As a note, my husband was a heavy rum drinker pre-TSM. Since he started, he only bought a bottle ONCE and that was an experiment to see if he still liked it, which he didn't. So he mainly drinks beer, sometimes a cooler which is pre-mixed in the bottle already. I consider that to be okay. His mother questioned me about it when she saw him drinking a Mott's Caesar, but I told her, it's different now, he's drinking a normal mixed drink, like other people do. No more of these self-poured drinks, where he'd have 5-6 shots of booze and a little Coke or something just to give it colour!!

Anyways, it's been amazing so far. I am really happy with his progress, we no longer have big arguments over the drinking. My nagging days are over (for the most part). I still sometimes say "maybe you've had enough" and he gets PO'd, but that's about it. Things are really calm and happy for the most part.

Have a nice day and keep up with the posting and tell your wife, she is doing great!!!

Checking in again. Not long after my last response, my wife had difficulties at work and started drinking again. She stopped taking nal and had a terrible month and a half. Same old alcoholic behavior and attitude until I was able to get her in to see her doctor. This is something I had to do because she stopped going to work and needed a doctors note to go back or face possible termination. Since her doctor deals with addiction in addition to being a general practitioner, he tried to get her into detox, as she was drunk when I got her into the doctors office. After I brought her home, I had to get back to work for a couple of hours. Since I figured that she had drank everything she had hidden in the house before I brought her to the doctors office, I placed a marker behind the wheel of her car to see if she would go out and buy more booze. When I returned from work, I noticed that car had been moved (big surprise). When I questioned her how things were going and later asked if she had gone anywhere, she said she had not. At that point I told her I knew she had used the car and if she did not produce the booze she had bought, I was leaving. After denying that she had anything hidden, I just said matter of factly, if you do not bring the booze here and dispose of it, I was done and I'd be leaving to rent a place of my own. This was after about a month and a half of living with an active alcoholic and all the goodness that comes with that. Finally, as I ate supper, she said, if I bring you the booze will you keep your end of the bargain up and stay with me. I said yes, if it all (booze) comes out. She produce several small bottles of wine and a pint of vodka that was poured into a spring water bottle. After I poured it down the sink, we started on her detox. Imagine, not a single empty detox bed in the area and I live in a good sized city. Just goes to show how extensive this addiction is. Her doctor was great. Called during the evening to see how she was doing, pulse rate, bp etc and several times on the wekend to check in. He called in a script for Librium the next morning as no detox beds had opened up. The weekend went well and my wife went back to work a week later as the doctor wanted her to take another week off from work due to the work stress. During that week she started to see a counselor/therapist, a part of the deal the doctor made to give her the note for work but he also doubled her strength of nal to 100 mg. The counseling/therapy was useless as it always was (abstainance only) and she started back on TSM and 100 mg of nal when she had some wine on the following weekend. We went back to our regular workout routine and having a few glasses of wine only on the weekend at night with nal at 100mg. The other days were alcohol free. The change in my wife is huge. She is a different person. Fun, loving, optomistic, caring. Everything she is not when she drinks. Someone posted that TSM is like a roller coaster ride, well this is very true in my situation. The 100mg of nal has been working well for the past couple of months. I personally think the 50 mg of nal worked well but it doesn't work if you do not take it! The holidays are coming up and I do not fear them like I did before she started nal. I do not know for sure if there are any more roller coaster rides for me in the future but I will keep up my posts here to tell our story, both the successes and failures.

Thanks for the update-I've been following your story since I joined the site in October. I too have put my partner through hell with my drinking and even though I didn't end up in the ER (I probably should have on several occasions) my years of drinking 3 bottles of wine a day were destroying my relationship. Your wife is so lucky to have you. TSM has been amazing for me, and many others, but it definitely does not and will not work if it's not taken properly. I really hope you can work with her to commit to taking the NAL an hour (at least 30 mins) before drinking every single time. Do you think she tries to limit her consumption when she takes the NAL, especially if she's drinking on NAL with you? I'm wondering if it's something she feels she has to do subconsciously which is why when she goes on a bender all hell breaks loose and she doesn't take the pill because she figures what the hell?
Benders can and probably still will occur on TSM, the difference is the payoff for excessive drinking is you're extinguishing the behavior over time.
Would she be open to reading any of the posts here?

Thanks for the response St Jude. During these binge's, my wife stops taking nal. Why? Great question. My experience with my wife has led me to believe that she lacks coping skills and turns to alcohol to deal with big problems. The physical need to drink as opposed to the psychological need to drink I guess. I believe that nal can relieve the physical urge but the psychological need for my wife to drink rears its' ugly head at times of great stress. Prior to this last binge she was doing well and when she did binge, it was short and not nearly as intense as it was prior to TSM. This one, although, was a doozy. She had big problems at work (non alcohol related, boss was a bitch) which started the binge, and unlike the binges using TSM, she couldn't stop this one herself. It lasted almost a month and a half and, thankfully, it did end with the Dr.'s visit. Even that little fact is a small victory since it did not require detox, hospital or any other intense intervention. We just went through the holidays and everything went fine. A marked improvement from years past when I dreaded the holidays due to my wife's drinking. While there are still occassional problems with my wife's drinking, nal and TSM have tremendously reduced the problems that my wife's drinking had/has created. As to whether she would be willing to read these posts, I don't think so. She is so ashamed of her behavior when she was drinking without nal, I think it would cause more problems that it would be worth. I although, find it a bit liberating to share our story with others who are trying to deal with similar problems. Nal has given my wife and I our lives back. Not perfect but believe me, much, much better than before TSM.