After 4 beers tonight, I feel ill. I don't want anymore. I suppose I should stop and let the extinction work its magic. Or I am I supposed to continue drinking to reinforce the extinction. That is not clear to me. What should I do?

Bob

I continued through the "wall", despite my better judgment. It got easier until I got to the level of intoxication that I'm used to. I don't know what tomorrow will bring. I may not be able to pass the "I don't feel like any more" stage. And that will be a good day when it comes.

Bob

My experience has been that if I go past 4 beers, it's a pretty good bet I'll continue until I get pretty buzzed or totally drunk (8-12 total). I'm hoping I can become satisfied with just 4 eventually - I don't even think the craving for more is too bad at that point, but the "mechanical reflex" to keep going kicks in. Then after number 5, I start to clearly feel the buzz (good), and off I go...

But hey - the fact that I can even consider making a CHOICE after 4 is a big deal for me, so it's progress!

Very good point Kris! I did have the choice and I made the choice to continue into inebriation tonight. Tomorrow may be different. I think I am now prepared for my two AF days.

Bob

Well gee, Eddie -
Welcome! I too found your lightening strike story pretty incredible. I never had that repulsion to stop drinking in the first week (the honeymoon) or ever after. I am consuming pretty much as ever, but by counting, I see the subtle improvements. I encourage you to keep track also, like the Method dictates.

Good luck, hang in & hope you get the much needed support we have all gotten here. Mrs. Cleaver will be so unimpressed but we will be!

Hi Bob and all.
Just got back into reading after a few weeks intensive work. Your story is wonderful - in the sense that you have really 'done battle'. I know we all have and so understand where you are at. I tried topamax two years ago and could not hack the side affects although I do think it was working. A few years down the road and an orthopaedic op later Im settling into the Sinclair method and am on week 10. I have to say my drinking went up - alongside the stress of the last few weeks but, I am finding my 'thinking' is changing. You know what the AAer's call 'stinking thinking' ? well I can honestly say I am now released from that. The thought patterns that shoot yourself in the foot all the time like 'your a loser' and 'you'l never kick it'. As this is all part and parcel of the addiction I am really encouraged to see the 'self loathing' significantly decrease and - that in advance of my drinking coming down. But now, I think the drinking compulsion is just about loosening its stranglehold too. I met a mate yesterday afternoon and I had an unscheduled glass and a half of wine. That means the first one in ten weeks without a Nal. Eventually went home, took a nal fully expecting the compulsion to rage in and force me to drink anohter bottle. It didnt! I really could have not bothered with another glass of wine. But I did of course:-) because, the habit is still strong. I drank a half a bottle and went to bed without a blackout - which is rare these days. So, I think this week I am turning a corner. I am going to look at the 'habit' side of things and maybe start acting on the positive impulse which says 'you really don't want that - youre only drinking it out of habit.

Well lets see and everybody keep on going on.

I relate so much with everything you say Camelia. My stinking thinking is also much improved these days. I actually quite like myself most of the time.

I also need to address the habit thing- I know most days I am taking a drink now purely out of habit, not because I want one. I am not to sure how to go about dealing with it though, as I am in the same place doing the same thing every night, 7 days a week. I cannot change that at present.

Bob, you certainly sound like a trooper- you have been through the mill and back. I do so hope this is finally the answer for you- it sounds like you are doing fantastically well with it.

I also completely relate to the lessening of 'stinkin' thinkin'.' The exception is first thing in the morning, as I'm waking up. On Naltrexone, every morning I start to wake around 5:30 or so - too early for me to want to get up. So I roll over to go back to sleep, and from then till 7:30 or 8, when I get up, I have odd dreams. Not nightmares, but very odd thoughts and visuals. . .most of them on the negative side. I can tell it's definitely a side effect of the Nal, as I've never had anything like this before.

The habit thing was also a problem for me, so I've decided to do something about it. Yesterday I planned to go AF. It was a breeze thru most of the day - hardly a cringe of craving. So I figured I had it made. But then at supper time cravings hit HARD. To where I got trembly. So after dinner I took a Nal, and by 7 or so was drinking a glass of wine. Ended up having one bottle, or 5 units - half my usual.

I would have drank as much as usual if I'd opened that wine earlier in the day, as is my habit. Instead I ignored the 'little push' I had at the usual time, and didn't give in till I got hugely triggered. Even then, I made myself wait till the Nal kicked in. The result was much decreased drinking.

So I'm forming a new habit. On weekdays at least, I'm not going to take Nal, or even plan to drink, until/unless I am hit hard by craving. When/if that happens, I'll take my Nal and drink as usual. I think that if I want to take my life back, then I'm going to have to have some active part in the 'taking.'

I agree G4M- although my levels have been low again this week, I am a bit annoyed that I haven't had an AF all week, the last one was day 1 of week 7, and this is the last day of week 8 for me.

So I am going to attempt using a little bit of willpower today- not quite sure how it will work out- I might also not log in to the board during the hours where I normally have my first drink. I think that 'talking' about drinking might be setting me off somewhat.

this is all so wise ( firstly to avoid logging in at this point for Marb )
And the attempt to push on to take AF's .