Bob, I love your avatar - it speaks volumes.

My only concern here is the combination of drugs and alcohol. I shared elsewhere on this Board how taking pain meds w/alcohol made me feel literally suicidal. Do you have someone in your life you can call who will come running if you should need help? If not, please talk to someone you trust and get that person in place. Please.

Wow, yea, Valium and alcohol are a really bad combination. Valium is a benzodiazepine, which is the class of drug they use to moderate extreme alcohol withdrawal. It and alcohol interact very synergistically, which is to say that they multiply each other. It's a good way to get yourself killed, so don't be taking Valium anywhere near when you're drinking.

Buspar isn't quite so bad. It "adds" a bit to the alcohol experience, but isn't a killer like Valium. Buspar is one of those that you have to let build up in your system, so you can't just stop taking it before drinking and expect that to work. Just be careful, eh?

Kris, sorry to hijack your thread. I'll go see if Bob has a progress thread of his own.

I like that opening. We will get together fine. As a matter of fact, you might as well drop the blame word out of it since you are the only blamer that matters. Stick will us. We are going to bust out of this joint and beat the rap!

Goin4More, Robert Rapplean Yes, Benzos+Alcohol=Death. I have been warned by all my medical professionals. Unfortunately, I cannot stop taking the Valium without life threatening withdrawals. I have already dropped my dosage from 15mg/day to 10mg/day in the past month which is faster than recommended by my shrink, but I wanted to be at a safer lower dosage while going through the SM. Although I drink alone, my wife (a non-drinker) is always around to keep an eye on me.

SpringerRider Yep, I guess you are correct; I am the only blamer and I know we are going to beat this addiction!

KrazyKris I am always hard on myself. I wish I wasn't that way, but I am. One self-improvement project at a time. And yes it's too early to evaluate the SM efficacy. It took us years to get where we are. I'm glad it only takes months get get back, but I sure am an impatient man. BTW, I am sorry if I hijacked your thread; I think I'll start my own progress thread so as not to muddy up your thread with my baggage.

Bob

Hi All,

I’m late in reporting my progress for week 6 – been wondering how to analyze it. I had some bad stuff, mostly seeing that my Mom is struggling physically, and starting to lose her memory – WAY too early from what I expected. Worry about not being able to take care of her, as she is over 2 hours away, and I can’t just drop everything and go whenever. Siblings aren’t in a position to help, expect I have a brother in Florida who is pretty well off, so may be able to help financially. Money isn’t the problem right now, but will be in the future.

Anyhow, I’ve realized that my drinking has actually gone up in general since starting TSM, especially when life situations get to me. I think it’s because I’m giving myself permission to drink more freely, and not really trying to control myself yet. I also was using 75 MG instead of 50, but finally realized I would run out of Nal if I continue without some AF days. (My psych wouldn’t up my script, and still doesn’t know I’m doing TSM – 30 pills at 50 MG is max/month). I was using the higher dose because I am paranoid that I need it, having a really high tolerance to meds in general, and Dr. E. indicated it is possible that SOME might require a higher dose, but this has only been shown for gambling addictions, so nobody knows for sure. On top of that, when drinking in AM and later in PM, I would take another dose to be ‘safe’ – this definitely will deplete my supply if it continues. Dr. E suggested it might be prudent to take an additionall dose if a second bout of drinking happens several hours (6-8?) after the first, so I was doing that. NOTE: I am NOT advising anyone to vary from the standard method/dosage, so PLEASE don’t let my approach up to this point confuse the rest of you.

So now I’m going back to 50 MG per day, avoiding multiple episodes per 24 hour periods, and will even try for an AF now and then if I can. I don’t think this would be impossible if I made more of an effort instead of “rushing to drink” before my next opportunity comes – I’m still doing the sneaking thing, and I think it is a trigger in itself, as Dr. E. mentioned as a possibility. (All of the info to which I am referring is from posts in the Questions for Dr. E. thread).

Another thing – I never really had the honeymoon experience, and am not seeing any great overall change yet. However, there have been moments when I’ve found a decreased desire to ‘go for it’ while drinking – even forgot my beer was almost empty a few times! Might not sound like much, but I’ll take it for now, and I refuse to over-think my experience. I’ll just keep plugging away and have faith. Seeing real results already from so many of you gives me hope, and I won’t get discouraged if my progress takes longer – I just know it will come.

Thanks for all the support – it means the world to me!

Kris,

I have a suggestion for you to try out.

Most of us have made a habit of drinking fairly quickly (compared to others) and excessively to the point of intoxication. The mechanisms that drive this can be complex but ultimately are driven by our endorphine enforced behavior, as Dr. Eskapa teaches us. The Sinclair Method removes the enforcement part of our drinking, but I'm finding that there are some behaviors or triggers that I just naturally associate with drinking. I am finding at my point in The Sinclair Method journey that these behaviors and triggers still have a pull on me (I think this is a behavioral thing), but The Sinclair Method is giving me the ability to refrain from drinking.

My suggestion is this: Set out two days this week where you will not drink alcohol the entire day. To be safe, you might want to take you Nal anyway, just in case. Make a commitment to yourself not to drink on these days, and do your best to stick to it. You will no doubt feel the urge to drink (I do when I've done this), but you may find that The Sinclair Method is starting to give you the ability to restrain more than you think. You may likely find that at times in the day you feel the urge to drink, but it is not overwhelming. It is more of a "Dang, I'd really like to have a drink," instead of a "I just HAVE TO HAVE A DRINK."

During this day, try to avoid obvious triggers. Again, you will likely find that you have a tug to drink, but it won't be overwhelming.

Just a few thoughts.

Q

Hey Kris -- You've made great progress in the sense that you've put in nearly two months of following what Eskapa calls the Golden Rule: You always take nal before you drink. Good on ya! The ones who are having success here are the ones who follow Sinclair's and Eskapa's direction to just take the nal and drink as they normally do. Eskapa repeatedly reminds us that everyone is different and will see progress at a different point in the process. I did have some craving reduction myself, but I got sort of envious when I'd read about others having AF daysm which at eight weeks I was not even ready to consider. Damn it's tough to avoid comparing ourselves to others. In response to a question, Dr. Eskapa wrote that it is fine to try to taking drinking if you can handle the craving. But your craving level seems still high right now, so PLEASE don't set yourself up for a disappointment. Many of us go along with no perceptible progress then have a quantum leap at two or three months. This may or may not happen for you. It is a four-to-six month process.

You're doing great!

You are making great progress, Kris! I can't really add anything to what Q and lena's post said, so I won't repeat it, except for this which bears repeating; when you do decide to have your AF day, don't take your Nal. I am beginning my 4th week and I am planning on 2 consecutive AF days, this Wednesday and Thursday. I think I'm ready to try it and especially after last night's experience of not finishing a drink and throwing the rest way - something unthinkable one short month ago. I did go through the "honeymoon period" during my first few days on TSM, but I quickly went back to previous AL intake levels and even higher at times as you have, so I am encouraged that I am one of those people for which TSM will work.

We shall see if I can make it through the AF days starting Wednesday. It's not like I have a choice. I only have 4 Nal's left, and I can't renew my prescription until the 12th. I too upped my dosage feeling that if 50mg was good, 75mg must be better, not thinking that I'd run out because I could always get a new prescription, but my shrink says 50mg is enough for me too! So we are kinda in the same boat, except I'm a month behind you.

Bob

Hi again - thanks for the encouragement! I think my choice to use 75 MG was premature, because I didn't even give 50 MG (used in the right way) a chance. It's just that I took it on and off w/ and without abstinance, and didn't see any results. However, that strategy would have alternately helped, and then hurt - depending on my drinking patterns. No attempt to track or moderate my consumption didn't help either. I basically wasted my time and Nal, not knowing about TSM.

I need to let the Nal work its magic, but not without a committment on my part to control my drinking. Isn't it funny that no matter how bad the outcome or consequence of a devastating alcoholic event (where we SWEAR we will stop), we somehow forget how bad it was, or minimize it? I'd never forgive myself in another case, but with alcohol, it somehow becomes 'not so bad'... This is what has happened to me since I started TSM - forgetting the desperation and desire to change that brought me here in the first place. Just because I am allowed to drink with TSM, it doesn't give me a license to revert to stupidity. I got here because I really NEED to change my ways, not forget and forgive because of the denial I leaned on so often.

Hey - I got through 2 pregnancies without drinking (mostly), so I can do this. I can't let TSM become the auto-pilot to ensure I land safely. I need to read the safety/emergency instructions (the book - The Cure for Alcoholism) again and again, taking responsibility for improving my chances of survival. Time for me to grow up and face reality. I often just 'fill up my empty drink' without thinking, when I actually have enough in my tank to get by for a while. If I never stop to think about it, I'll waste my time getting an unnecessary fill up, and risk a serious accident because of it.

I will now try to stop and think before letting automatic physical reactions control me. (EMPTY Beer does NOT = Automatic REFILL)!

Kris

My AF experience with TSM has been as such-

I didn't have an AF day until day 28.

I then had 6 AF days over the next 15 days- but the last one of those was 12 days ago now...so no AFs, burst of AFs and no AFs again.

I was going to have one today, but I do fancy a drink, so I will drink. I guess they will just come when we are ready.

keep at it, you are doing great!