No worries Helpful. You have the right attitude, and one bad episode doesn't mean TSM isn't working. Backslides happen, but they continue to become fewer and farther between. Holidays, IMO, can be a recipe for disaster. How are you supposed to 'practice' extinguishing something that only happens once a year? Add to that the insanity that might come from obnoxious relatives who want you to toast with shots of vodka instead of wine because "we've always done it that way" - YIKES! It's dangerous territory for me, so now I am extra careful to not get cocky and blow it. I also believe that even if TSM has done wonders, I still need to remember where I came from - and the beast can rear it's ugly head again if I let my guard down.

Your wife is doing great, and she's very lucky to have such a supportive spouse!

To AsRealityTurns, I was also one to think that my wife could "just stop drinking". Did that for years as she tried and failed each time. It wan't until I read about naltrexone that I understood that it wasn't a choice. When I read the first article on nal, it was an epiphany, like I was hit by lightning (well not that severe). It was the first time that I understood that the chemical reactions (endorphin releases) drove my wife to continue to binge. It was an eye opener and a realization that another chemical, nal, could block the receptors in the brain and break that cycle of cravings. And that she could once again gain control over alcohol. That, as I understand it, is the beauty of nal. For us, it is working better than I could have imagined. To be honest, in my heart I never thought my wife would ever be totally abstainent, even though I know I could, and did for quite a while. Nal has been, to date, the answer we have been looking for. My sole purpose for writing these posts is to help someone else who is struggling with Al and has had no success with traditional models.

Keep encouraging her on helpful spouse and not only will she have a brand new life but you will have a brand new wife! I give you a lot of praise for standing by your wife, you must really love her. I pray that all the years that were taken from the two of you by AL will come back to the both of you like it was new all over again.

corkit

Checking in with a progress report now that the holiday season is over. My wife is some 4 1/2 months into TSM and for the most part, doing very well. A pattern has emerged though. As one poster put it, the holidays are difficult times for those with alcohol problems and this is the pattern that has emerged. Christmas and New Year's followed the same pattern as Thanksgiving. My wife drank more than "usual" on both holidays and the day after was similar to the day after Thanksgiving. There was a "slip". On both days my wife decided to continue drinking and that brought out the "nasty" side of her that I had experienced during her binges over the years. On a positive note, these slips only lasted a day. Two days after the holidays and she was back to what I describe as "normal". This is where I see nal playing a huge part in her getting better. Pre-nal, those binges would have lasted days if not weeks and would end up in a very self destructive way. Detox, emergency room, etc. The fact that she recovered from the "slip" so quickly and was able to get back into a normal routine so quickly is still pretty amazing to me. During the holiday season we went to a few social situation where a lot of alcohol was consumed with no consequences. Open bar cocktail party, get together with old friends and never having an empty glass of wine the whole evening, family get togethers where everyone had something to drink. These would have been unthinkable and unbearable prior to nal, but the three holidays, somehow, were different. In looking back at the past four plus months, it has been an amazing turn-around in my wife's life and mine. While I'm not thrilled about the slips after those three holidays, the fact that they lasted only a day and life resumed "normally" after that is pretty amazing. From reading posts on this board, I know that 4 1/2 months of TSM isn't a long time for positive results. I am looking forward to the complete transformation of my wife and her problem as we continue on with nal. No more holidays coming up soon and I have no anxiety looking at the future. Nal has changed how alcohol affects my wife, period. We still have some work to do but our life is coming back together. We are now back to our routine of hitting the gym at least 5 days a week and abstaining during the week. Looking forward to the new year, which is very different from the past several years when I didn't know if my wife was going to make it or not. For us, nal has been a life changer.

Oh HS, I can't tell you HAPPY your post made me! I am soooo happy for the changes in your wife, but even more impressed and awed by the fact you are seeing those changes, accepting the "blips" and apparently being so supportive. You sound like an awesome guy and she is very lucky to have you standing by her. Those 3 isolated days, altho disappointing like you say, could have been much worse - all that you described. I'm sure she is relieved as well.

It's working! Wonderful news and hope the New Year continues to go well!

Thanks for the update. Looking at the larger picture, TSM seems like it has been a huge success. Congratulations to you and your spouse.

Wow. What a rollercoaster. Thanks for all the detailed information, all the best to both of you.

Hmmmm. It's been 2 1/2 months since I last posted and now 7 months into TSM with my wife. During the last post I was sure my wife would get "back with the program" and fare well. That did not happen. A week later, my wife had a major set back. She went on a 10 day binge. During that binge and possibly before it, she stopped taking nal. Since this is a third party post, I can't be exact or sure of all the fine details. I am pretty sure that during those 10 days, she purposefully did not take nal before drinking. It was hard to understand why she would do this after doing so well for the first 5 months of TSM. The last two days of her binge, it finally clicked in her head that taking nal would help her stop the cravings and I don't think I will ever know what goes on inside her head that made her stop taking nal and start the destructive behavior again. The hiding of the booze, missing work, the verbal abuse (which I now give back after I've had enough, not proud of it but I can no longer hold back). Anyway, the last two days of binging, she took nal when she got up in the morning and she was able to stop and get sober. That was mid January. Since then, she has done well again on nal with one minor binge for 2 days. To a stranger, this behavior would not be considered successful but looking at the big picture, I do consider the last seven months a success. Certainly not a cure or extinction but real progress from when she started TSM. We talk about the progress she has made and she continues to make and she acknowledges how far she has come. Compared to where my life, and my wife's problem with alcohol, was seven months ago, I am truly amazed. In seven months, a few bumps in the road and one major pot hole (the 10 day binge), there has been a huge improvement in our quality of life. My wife's problem with alcohol, prior to TSM, was so severe that I questioned how long she could live like that. This is not hyperbole, believe me. I still believe we are making progress and have extolled the virtues of nal to many. As I have said in previous posts, I believe my wife will always have a problem with alcohol. Nal has given her a degree of control over it. For this I am grateful. I still am amazed that our lives are almost back to "normal". We still have some wine on the weekends with her taking nal an hour before drinking. It the coming months, I am hoping she can smooth out those bumps and pot holes in her road to full control over alcohol. I will continue to post periodically. Whether it is good or bad news, I feel my (our) story can help others who seem helpless, as my wife was.