Hey ART!

I know exactly how you feel - I'll envision that I 'll experience a night of controlled drinking, and end up failing miserably. The next day I am disgusted, and easily fall into despair. Just keep the faith - it's going to be a long haul. With an almost 80% success rate, your chances are great, but it may take longer than you'd hoped. I think it's discouraging sometimes to hear that others are seeing results earlier, but just turn it around in your mind and see it as hope for what is yet to come....We'll all get there eventually.

Just remember: NEVER give up!

Kris

Oh ART, I feel for you, but ditto what Elfern and Kris have written- just hang on in there. (You cannot do anything else anyway, really can you? It is all we can ever do).

When you look at my signature it looks like a dream come true and for me it is- but there have been lots of downs shoved in there too- we don't tend to report them so much I guess, because for me personally it is very hard to even write when I am feeling like a complete waste of absolute space.

Remember most of these bad feelings are caused by the alcohol, alcohol is a depressant, it is simply what it is- it is only doing it's job. Our problem is not with the alcohol per se, but with our over developed neural pathways.

We are still gonna get some very bad down days while we are on the method, especially on the days after we have over used. They don't magically disappear, but they DO become less intense and further apart. I truly believe we have to experience these horrible downers to jump up a notch and make progress.

Added as an edit (I wanted to post that quickly as you were online, but I am a pretty awful typist and by the time I submitted it you had gone) but we are all in very early days here.

Potato, RV and Springer are I think the furthest on, then comes Q, myself, Ashl, G4M and one or two others around the same week, but we are only 6 weeks in! This is around a third of the distance- far too early to know how things will pan out.

Just keep following the golden rule, and if you have a shite day, do what you have done, post and let us know you are feeling like crap, or for an even better response PM one or some of us. We need each other at times like this.

Ahhh, don't be so hard on yourself. Just repeat after me: "This, too, shall pass. . ."

I have days when I get down on myself, and begin to doubt this method. I think it's the addict's nature to want/expect immediate, consistent results. But this doesn't work that way, and so we need to teach ourselves to be patient. I know it would help if we had a few people who have had long-term success with this, but for now we have to depend on the scientific data - and on one another. We're here for ya, buddy!

I do think the Naltrexone has a somewhat dulling effect on the emotions. But I noticed on my one AF day, and the day after, that my mood was exhilerated. The sun shone brighter, the birds chirped louder - it was wonderful. So I suspect that when we take Naltrexone after a day (or more) off of it, that flat and listless feeling might seem even more so, in comparison with the receptor uptake days. So, I just look forward to the time when I can easily decide just to forego alcohol in favor of feeling really good without any 'help.'

For now, know that we're pullin' for you. . .

(Edit to add: don't worry about tracking 'proper' units. I don't. I just count the number of average sized drinks in a day. It still shows my progress. And what's really cool is that I used to pour my wine up high in a very large glass. Now I still like a large glass, but only fill it 1/2 full - and enjoy it more. So I may be drinking less in relation to where I started than it actually appears.)

I have just upped my dosage to 50 mgs 2 x a day. I drink round the clock as this is the way I think I can best cover myself. I am not experiencing any "bad" reactions to this increase, nor am I experiencing any non appreciation of things in my life I enjoy. So....

I have been drinking more though, but I am not going to stress about it. It NEVER gets out of control which is amazing, and I have not been intoxicated at all.

I think I am doing well, and I feel good too.

I am at least logging each time I open a bottle of wine, so I have some kind of record. Pretty sure I am drinking 1 to 1 & 1/2 bottles in a 24 hour period. So we shall see. And there are chunks of hours in the day I do not drink, like 3 hours!

I am not Dr. Eskapa but I think it is impotant that you target your Nal to you drinking and not to the calendar. Here is how I have stated the protocol. Take Nal one hour before you drink and mark that day on the calendar with a "N". Drink as you would until you pass out or go to bed. When you wake up and decide to drink again, look at the date on your VCR. If it is later than the one that you marked on the calendar, take another Nal. If not, drink without. You will quickly fall into a rythme of taking Nal prior to drinking once a day.

This taking 50 mgs 2 x a day ain't what's happening.

The good doctor may differ but that is my take.

Springer: I get confused by this.

Peace brother

Anyway, back to me. I have upped my nal to 50 mgs 2 x a day and I think I had a better weekend as a result. I feel I was "covered" and I did not feel totally ruled by AL. My intake for each of the past four days has been 1 to 1 1/2 bottles of wine daily. Sat and Sun 1 bottle 24 hours. No bad reactions to the extra Nal.

Also with a little less AL in my system maybe I won't be waking in the night, ready to drink.

I really appreciate you people that are able to strictly follow the plan, I will do it the best I can and I try to improve on my logging and steadfastness. I am improving my self discipline.

I was astute today about taking my Nal. I took it at 10 am and did not drink until 12pm. I did not drink in the middle of the night, so maybe I can get on a better schedule to log my drinking. I am through 1/2 bottle of wine and have 1/2 more left for today so that's my log.

I think if at the end we feel by modifying it slightly it will work better, why not?

If you feel it is not doing you any good after a few days, you can always go back to the original 50mgs.

I think the boost of the Nal was a good thing.

I never did drink the rest of the wine and today I just took my Nal @ 9:00 am. I did not drink prior to the pill.
I am going to get on a course. I realized that I can at least not drink and get a pattern going with the med. I thought this: I want to get control of my drinking and not ruin my life, I can wait 1 hour for a drink.
I did a class recently in positive affirmations and I think subconsciously it sunk in! (And I feel more positive about my objectives.)