I am almost two weeks into TSM. I am taking 12,5 mg Nal and have had great progress so far. This week I am having very little alcohol and already 2 AF days. I decided not to drink at home, only when I am in a social situation. Last night, however, I felt a desire for one more glass of great wine. I had one large glass with friends and happily we could not stay long - otherwise, I doubt that I would have been able to say no to the next glass. Nowadays, I can easily stop after a glass, but last night it was not so easy. Nal is definitely not a magic pill, but it does help! Life changes are necessary, too. Like removing oneself from tempting situations, drinking water, no wine at home etc.

Exactly !!

I had great success this week. Only half the drinks consumed. This next week will be more difficult, since there are many dinner parties. I need to learn how to drink more water at events like this. I also need to learn how to just leave the wine in the glass so that it looks that I am drinking, although I am not. I have a friend who gave up drinking and did not tell anyone. He keeps his glass full with wine when at dinner parties and just does not drink it.

Why do you have to pretend to drink? Can't you just say that you do not feel like it ? Or why do you have to say anything at all? The more the other people drink, the less they will notice that you aren't ! Great that your intake is down so much - well done !

Hugs, Maggie

Well done on the reduction and the changes.

I do agree with Maggie, and I feel that with time you'll get the realisation it's ok not to drink and to either say no or ask for a soft drink.

Remember you are an adult with choice.

It's funny that when you are an alcoholic you not only have to pretend to drink when you don't want to drink but you have to pretend to NOT drink when you do want to drink Ok maybe not funny but I try and have a sense of humor with it. I know exactly what you are saying but with Naltrexone I don't need to pretend to either drink or not drink anymore, so long as the Naltrexone keeps working. Like you 12.5mg seems to do the trick perfectly for me in the course of an evening. Don't forget the goal of TSM is to either become a social drinker or to abstain totally. If successful with the program as 80% of the people in clinical trials are then the choice is yours. Personally I aim to be a social drinker and with that comes the responsibility of drinking in moderation.

I do understand that comes with the crowd you hang out with too. Having played guitar in a rock band for 15 years I know what it's like to be surrounded by people who support each others drinking into oblivion and that's why on many occasions I would pretend to be drinking when in fact I was not. But it's probably best to be straight up and say no thanks.

Anyway sounds like it's working out for you and thats great!

Ocean - that did make me laugh - but it is SO true!!!!

Hugs, Maggie

It made me laugh, too! However, pretending is an interesting question. Yes, when one is drinking too much one is pretending that one is not. And funnily when one is cutting down one is pretending that one is still drinking. I want to be just a social drinker. I love some wine with meals and occasional beer. Today, I had one beer in the restaurant - with dinner. What I fear are dinner parties where wine is poured constantly and there I am planning to keep my glass full. I do not want to explain anyone that I cut down drinking, because people did not notice before that I drank too much. At parties, I drank the same amount as other people (and that was not excessive). If going out with another person, we would usually share one bottle of wine. My problem was that I started having wine on my own when I was alone. And then I could easily drink one bottle on my own. I want to cut this type of drinking and not the social one. I got great help from Nal for that.

I have two friends who are sort of pretending that they are drinking. One stopped drinking about a year ago, but did not make that public. I social situations (sort of official functions), he would allow that people fill his glass, but he would keep it full the whole time. Another friend drinks very little and I guess that she never had a problem with alcohol. However, she always allows her glass to be filled up at dinners - although she then drinks very little (maybe half a glass in the whole evening). I used to think what a waste it was to throw her full glass of wine away and sometimes when I was cleaning the table I would actually drink some of her left over wine. Since I do not want to explain my cutting down of drinking, I decided to keep the glass full as long as possible and drink very very slowly. And, of course drink a lot of water, too.

Glad to know I am not the only one who would not let someone's half empty glass go to waste when cleaning up! Peer pressure is what got most of us into drinking in our teen years and it is, and always will be, a strong factor when in social settings. So do what makes you feel comfortable in those social settings. Part of what I love about the TSM is that there is no expectation for an instant cure. So cutting back at home but still having a few at a social setting is big progress.

I used to say it was 'alcohol abuse' when I saw people not finishing their drinks and let it go to waist.

Tamtam, I am also new to the 'not drinking at social events' thing. This week I was going out with a friend for drinks, and kept my intake as low as possible. The next day friends came over unexpectedly and they brought wine. That was a tough one. While my husband was drinking with them I was drinking tea. Lots of tea. I said I was recovering from drinking the night before. No further questions asked.

Of course I could have popped a pill when they arrived, and joined the drinking after on hour. But I did not feel like drinking. Isn't that strange?
But even stranger is the uncomfortable feeling of not doing what others do. And yes, I also want to be a social drinker. Just not all the time. And I need to learn that it is ok to say: 'thanks, but no thanks' when alcohol is offered to me.

By the way, your progress looks good!