Hello Board
I am loving my Alcohol Free days. This is a real change for me to not drink every day during the week and especially this week as it's a hard work week when I would normally distress by at least 4 big glasses of wine. I know it's early days but I really am not feeling the cravings as much. Last week I did crave so had a couple of 1 beer nights. This week is easy.

The times where I do unlock the vault by taking a Nal are a bit full on- I had 8 drinks on Valentines Day for dinner. I drank beer champagne cocktails and an amaretto. I realise now I was searching for the buzz but it wasn't coming. Ideally I would like to be able to go out to dinner and just have a couple of wines. It was strange seeing my best mate at the end of the night - she was absolutely plastered and I think I saw that for the first time as Im normally plastered too!. It was weird. I bought her a drink and it was really enlightening to see the look of what could only be described as lust in her eyes when she saw the drink on the table. I'm sure I have had that look plenty of times too!

It is a little bit depressing to think I will never get that buzz from alcohol ever again (hopefully). However that's what has been the addicting controlling factor. It is very empowering to think I may be able to get out of alcohol's clutches and be in charge of myself again. It's also a bit scary having to face up to my problems and issues without the crutch of alcohol. I have been seeing a counsellor who is helping me to deal with those issues. I am also going to SMART recovery to talk about how to break the habit and give and gain support from my fellow addicts.

Feeling pretty good this week and am going to get some strategies in place for the weekend too. My aim is no more than 4 units in a day.

Yes Im still only on 25 mg but I feel that it is blocking the receptors and when I have been up to 50mg I just feel terrible . I will watch very carefully though my responses and units and go to 50mg if I feel that the extinction process is not working.
Hope everybody is having a good week
MD

MD -

This is all sounding very good indeed! You are certainly to be congratulated and it's great that you are getting counseling too. As you bring your numbers down, your brain may toss away it's "favorite toy" for another "toy" that's more helpful to you that it knew about already, so your counseling may well get leveraged in that way.

I just jumped from 25mg to 50 in the last couple of days, I could feel the SE's fading and getting shorter in duration so I thought let's give it a go and see, so don't be afraid to put on another 12.5mg to help you along. I started just a few days into the year, so about the same time as you, I think.

It sounds like you're making very good progress under less than optimal circumstances. You seem to be quite ready for it!

Thanks JSP. So glad to hear your SEs are on the wane. That's great news! I would try an extra quarter but I guess I would need pill cutters.
Have been invited out with friend that I described above Friday night to a place where they have a champagne button . When you push it someone immediately comes to your booth to top up your flute. I love champagne but I'm thinking this is just probably not a good idea for me at the moment . I know the aim is to drink normally as long as you take the Nal but this just seems to much like a celebration of alcohol and me and it don't have a good relationship. I don't want to celebrate it ! What do people think ?
md

Hi there Moderate drinker - things do sound as if they are going well for you. I just have a question for you. you DO take the nal every time you drink don't you? You said 'The times where I do unlock the vault by taking a Nal are a bit full on' - so does that mean there are times when you do NOT unlock the vault and drink without nal? You also said ' I know the aim is to drink normally as long as you take the Nal' which made me wonder if you are taking it every time.

Joe was right on in suggesting that you go up by 12.5 mg until you get to 50mg - a pill cutter is not expensive and is a worthwhile investment if it helps re the AL.

Re the champagne place - are you asking if we think you should go? I think that it is up to you - maybe if you do, try to push the button less frequently? Or do you tend to go overboard when you go there?

You sound as if you are doing well and thinking all this through. Have you told the friend that you mentioned about naltrexone - does she know you are taking it?

hugs, Maggie

I think the champagne button might be tempting fate, but it also might be that you lose interest in it after a short bit and then you'll be trapped there watching your friend get plastered. Maybe suggest an alternate?

Thanks Guys
No I am following the golden rule. I always take Nal at least one hour before drinking . Yes I have told my friend about the Nal. I think I will give the champagne place a miss. I don't want to be trapped watching people get plastered
MD

nice work, MD! yeah, I would pass on the champagne thing if I were you. how much fun can it really be? nal on!

Well I didn't go to the Champagne place but I did sit at home and drink a six pack of FAt Yaks which are Aussie Craft Beers. If Im going to have a beer I want to make it a nice one I guess but that is 8 units - not good. It was Friday night after a long hard week and 5 AFDs but no excuse. I didn't drink mindfully and it was sort of going back to the old days. I know Ive got to get to 50mg of Nal. I took 25 mg - I will buy some pill cutters today to at least get another 12.5.

I feel pretty lousy today- very down. I forced myself to go for a run with the dog. It helped I guess.I need to keep busy....
Hope everyone's day is going well.

MD

Hey MD -

If drinking more than you thought you should is what got you down, let it go. If it was just a hangover, that's another thing. You'll get there. You're on the way.

Oh dear
Another big night on the drink. I counted 12 units. I did take a Nal but only 25 mg. Makes me think how much I would normally drink on a big night out. I suspect a lot more than 12. Ok definitely going up on the NAL.
dosage.

MD