Didn't drink very much last night, which was extremely good news because it meant I've been able to handle dealing with the bad news of someone sneak-burgling our house and stealing a whole bunch of stuff including two laptops and my car plus some things of sentimental value to my wife. Bar stewards. More impressive to Nal, though, is that I'm not desperate to get ratted as a "coping" strategy - five weeks ago, assuming that yesterday hadn't been a bender, then I'm pretty sure I'd be legless by now "to help".

BWD, that's terrible! good on you for not getting blind drunk. I'm not sure I would have been as strong. I hope you filed a report with the police?

A silver lining to a dark cloud, indeed. So sorry to hear about the thievery. Stay on plan! You're making progress.

Yup, reported to police inside an hour, got hire car, arranged for tomorrow off work, etc. Can't believe I could accomplish that! Sadly, the desire to get wasted is on me now & we're sinking 'em fast. Just hope that the Nal works the magic it's always done so far!

In many ways, we've been very lucky - car's been recovered, dog barked & disturbed them so they only had time to do quick grab (eg missed both our wallets & credit cards).

Thanks for the posts.. Let y'all know how the Nal holds out tomorrow. Boss has given me the day off, so Idon't have to stress about that too (he also offered to come & help if we need it)

Wow. That is absolutely horrible. Hopefully, they didn't trash your car and you get your property back. Awesome that you didn't get trashed.

This really is incredible - despite "the thirst" coming over me at the start of the evening, I still ended up stopping before Bad Things [tm] happened. Both my wife, who doesn't drink much or often, and I were hammering them at the start of the night; I was convinced that I'd end up in a mess (and was busy drunkenly apologising in advance ), but the Nal did it's stuff leaving the worst aftermath of the night being a hangover . Don't know how much I drank because I wasn't keeping track - decided I just didn't care.

Although disappointed that I did end up getting drunk, it still seems fantastic that the level peaked where I was still in control. The choice to drink on this occasion fits well with the hypothesis propounded in the book Curi referenced (thank you - "The Heart of Addiction") namely a feeling of powerlessness. This is where I need to look beyond pharmaceutical solutions; guess I could do with making some progress in reading that book and other material.

Although I agree with many here about the cult features in AA, I also believe that some parts are sound and are (still) helpful for me; steps 5 & 10, if rephrased as "keeping a clear conscience" and without the religious^h^h^h spiritual bull, are IMHO good advice.

One of my personal beliefs is that anything which claims to be "The Answer" for a complex problem in any field is probably wrong, but is also likely to have elements which are valid in some circumstances; hence, it's my responsibility to evaluate the varying propositions, finding the parts from each that are pertinent to the problem as manifested to me, and synthesise a solution for the specific example of the problem that I'm dealing with.

Sorry for the ramble, hope it makes sense to someone!

Hey, BDW, ain't it just great when TSM does it's magic

I'm glad you like The Heart of Addiction, it helped me a lot at the time I read it, I was learning to be sober then and going through the AA loop- that I was a flawed human being, responsible for my own (and others') misery but powerless over alcohol... being responsible and powerless at the same time is not a nice place to be.

Keep up the great work.

Curi

So glad to hear you remained in control last night after all this horrible **** that happened. That is a true sign of TSM working its magic, I agree.
And yes, I agree with you regarding various psychological approaches and methods - they probably all have a grain of truth in them. I have to say that the whole "one day at a time" part of AA also really helps me at times, even though I wouldn't touch AA with a ten-foot pole...

Update from Pity-Parties-r-Us:

Units much higher than I want or think "fair"

Pattern has changed, alternating between not much (which, frankly, is what I actually feel like) and having silly-low 'binges' that amount to nothing as I'm doing right now. These sessions are so ridiculously low it's great . But wish I could stop them. Feeling very low atm having just paid ~280 dollars for privilege of getting my car back, which two garages say is likely to have severe suspension damage and I can't afford to claim on insurance because next year's premium would crucify me.

Sorry to rant, thanks for listening - and actually great that my 'real' desire continues to decline, albeit the numbers up due to pressure.

The subjective change is just as important, in TSM, as the number of units, You'll likely find that for a while, you'll keep drinking as much as before even though you don't WANT it as much. It doesn't make sense to someone who isn't it in our shoes, but it's real progress.