Hi Electra!

Hope the interview went well!

I think that the Wednesday ritual might take a while to extinguish-- trigger wise.

With every sip you take you are closer, though!

Warm regards,

Ketchikan1

Weekly recap time and let me just say....I am (happily....but warily) baffled. 11.5 units. Only 11.5 effing units!!!! That's honeymoon territory. I'll be honest - I think in general I want to drink a little MORE than this, lol. I basically only got the hint of a buzz one night (friday) and just sipped the rest of the week (only 2AF days, also strangely enough). The thing is I stayed in both Saturday and Sunday night because my boyfriend was moving in - so no real heavy partying there (but it's unlikely I will stay in Saturday nights as a rule). Also, the beginning part of the week was really stressful and dramatic, as my boyfriend was then having cold feet about moving in and all sorts of doubts about our relationship that came out of left field. Oddly enough, I had no desire to drink when sad and fraught and questioning everything. I was even sipping a bourbon when my boyfriend launched into his doubts and I felt so sick to my stomach by his revelations that I could not drink the rest and ended up escaping into a book and going to bed early. Let me just say: THIS IS STRANGE AND ABNORMAL FOR ME. As I may have mentioned before, I have always been more of a happy/celebratory drinker than a sad/depressed/lonely drinker, BUT very strong emotions of all kinds tended to prompt drinking. And mentally, my frist reaction was still to think, I should get drunk. but then it just seemed so POINTLESS, because I wouldn't be happy fun drunk, and then the next morning all my problems would still be there, except it would be worse because I would have a hangover and be a panicky mess. The fact that this thought process is happening is amazing.
Two of the nights these week I couldn't decide if I had a legitimate craving or just wanted to have to "right" to drink. I finally decided to take a nal and drink an hour or so later. Both times I was satisfied (hear that: SATISFIED. not a word I would ever have used before) after 1 or 2 drinks.
This is all really bizarre for me, but generally great news. Like I said, I'm prepared for my weekly averages to be a bit higher than this, because I mostly stayed in and had lots of things occupying me this week, and few social obligations. But if this could be my non-social week average, and have my partying week average be around 14-16 I'd be THRILLED.

TSM is WORKING!!!!!

EL, I just want to tell you how much I appreciate that .you relpy such encouraging posts to my threads as well as many others. Your words have been very helpful to me, and you inspire me Thank You

Way to go EL! Congrats on your progress - you've worked very hard at it and deserve it!

EL: You have a right to feel encouraged. Your hard work is a real inspiration!

11.5?! Awesome job, EL. You deserve it.

Good luck with the co-habitation situation. I've heard it can get interesting!

Go EL Go!

Great stuff EL - congrats!

Well, a sort of minor setback last night. Went out for happy hour with friends and it was the first time the boyfriend and I were going out and doing stuff since he got back (it's been moving and unpacking and stress around here!). It was really fun and good to be out and see people. I had three martinis and a bourbon...I'm thinking that's around 9 US units, but not sure. The martinis were on the small side but still, that's a cup full of alcohol This was over the course of 4 hours. I was fine when we left the bar to go home but as the alcohol KEPT hitting me, I got unpleasantly drunk and thought I had to throw up (couldn't, but felt really nauseous) It was a crappy ending to the night and now I am a bit hungover. However, I must say that I had no problem leaving the bar when my boyfriend wanted to and I did not have another drink at home...basically even though I drank too much I never felt completely out of control and "clutchy" around the booze. I'm gonna take the next two days AF to try and keep my numbers down a bit for the week (have a party to go to on Friday....)