Thanks guys,

Vincent I made a decision a few months ago(following a conversation with DOMD on another site) to quit messing with the formula in any way. Tampering doesnt fool nal and it doesnt fool the addiction, the only one I was trying to fool was myself. Im deadly serious as Im sure evryone is here about beating this addiction and the more possitives I feel the easier it is. There has been a big shift in the last few weeks, despite stresses, in my cravings and mindset. Typically now I have at least 4 if not 5 days alcohol and nal free. This is effortless. At the height of my addiction and in the early months of tsm I would still make sure that there wasnt alcohol in the house other than what I planned on drinking on any particular night. My habit was that if it was there I would drink it to pass out stage.It was for this reason that Christmas used to be such a mess for me with copious amounts of alcohol in the house. For the past month this has changed and on alcohol free days it may as well be milk in the fridge or the cabinet. This is a huge relief mentally. Im on TSM since around mid Feb and though from the begining cravings and units were down followed by upticks in the middle, this shift in mindset is the most recent and bigest possitive Ive seen. Lets hope it continues. Sometimes I still find it difficult to actually believ that this is actually working.

Mario,

Thank you for posting your experience. I would be so glad to have alcohol be like milk in my fridge. It think it will be. I just have to give it time. I think you are right that I can't outsmart the experience. I have to go through it to get the to end point. I am so grateful to have you along for the ride. I hope your hubby is doing OK. I am thinking about you both. BTDT

BTDT, He actually isnt too bad. He called me the other day and said he felt he needed to be in hospital but a few hours later he felt much better. He is back at work which Im not happy with but he is in managment and management dont get sick pay whereas everyone else in the hotel does.Madness. However its much quieter than it was in August and he is spending a lot of the time on paper work which isnt too bad. He went to the pub last night for his first drink since we were in Rome. I was asleep when he got home and was up early this morning so I dont know how he fared with his pint. I cant wait for the two of us to go away for a week of rest to the sun. I really think it would do him the world of good.

Yeah Im pretty surprised that nal has made such a diff in the last couple of weeks. I plan on drinking tomorrow night but right at this minute I dont know if I will have any interest.Its hard to imagine I will, but then again its only 11am on Thursday morning now so Im sure I will

Mario, I am so happy for you. You seem to really have turned a corner. How wonderful for you and your family. I think we don't realize how messed up things were until we see what "normal" looks like. You seem to have found normal. I'm a few months behind you in the uptick phase but I see glimpses of the control you are talking about. I hope your husband's health improves and keep posting on your journey it inspires.

I had to go to an event last night that I had completly forgotten about. A work friend has writen a book and it was being launched last night at a local hotel. I went and had two drinks and came home. Im thrilled with this especially as the girl that went with me was driving and could only have one drink which I forgot about and ordered her a second drink. I drank my own second one but couldnt drink hers and it just sat there for a half an hour. This is most probaly the first time I have ever left an event having had just two drinks. Its definatly the first time Ive WANTED to leave a pub after just two drinks.There was lots of free wine but I knew that I wouldnt even have been able to have one glass, the wine disgust is still strong. I was even worried that the girl that was driving might change her mind and stay out and we would have to get a taxi home. All I wanted was to go home and watch the end of a documentary that I had taped and go to bed.

All in all big changes for me in the last couple of weeks. So please, please dont anyone give up. What TSM is doing its doing quietly in the background and its only in time that it becomes obvious. I never wanted to be teetotal but sitting last night in the pub I could see it happening down the line, not for a long time, maybe a year or more but its something that I would think could easily happen to me as I continue with tsm into the future. I have no illusions that I may spike again from here but now I know for a FACT that tsm is working away, it worked regardless of whether I was in a period of doubting it or feeling positive about it. Godbless Sinclair, Ive never met him and I never will but he has changed my life and the life of my family.

This is so inspiring to me. Thank you Mario for sticking with it and sharing it with us. I'm right with you. I think I started 3 weeks before you. I'm so glad you are seeing such positive results! Keep it up. You've been such an inspiration.

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It is amazing what alcoholics will do to get a drink. I'm sure we can all see a little of your neighbors insanity in our own behavior, past or present. I only went to 3 AA meetings and I don't care for much of their rhetoric but there might be some application to the idea of needing to hit bottom in this case. Until she's lost everything...husband, kids, house she may not seek help. It is a real shame that there is something right within her grasp that could painlessly, and at least for some people, effortlessly reduce or eliminate her craving for alcohol and she is either too scared or too screwed up to reach out for it. I think we should change your name to Saint Mario for putting up with this neighbor and for helping her children. Kudos to you.

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Mario,

It's so nice that you've stepped in to help these kids while their mom cannot. It is painful to watch people unwilling to admit their problem suffer and make the folks around them suffer too. Having grown up is a drinking home, I can tell you those kids appreciate you more than you know. I'm just glad we have the chance to give our kids better BTDT