Christopher,

Thanks for the reply. Yes, the numbers are decreasing ever so slightly and there are ups and downs. I think much of what I am doing in terms of drinking is simply out of habit. Sort of like rote behavior. Here it is 3:00 and I can feel the demons tugging at me. I didn't drink yesterday and was hoping to make it two in a row. I'm not sure if I'm going to achieve that, but I will try. I guess it takes a while to change behavior patterns that have been established over decades. I am noticing that alcohol does not have the appeal that it used to have, although it hasn't had that initial appeal in a long time. I will be posting here regularly going forward. It is important for us to share our experiences as well as our strength and hope.

It looks like our progress is very similar in terms of the reduction as well as the blips. I am focusing on trying to look for the positive results and not beat myself up too bad over the setbacks. Changing routines seems to work if I could actually stick with one. I will say that I have not had an embarrassing moment with the wife or family in quite some time. That is a blessing. Keep up the great work!

Week 38


Saturday. Had to work Saturday at a job site until lunch. Went to lunch with 2 other co-workers, which turned into a 3 hour session. About 6 beers. Then proceeded to have about 6 more at home, however, at a turtles pace. Still probably had 15 total, so not good. However, this was stretched over 12 hours. So, I drank too many units, however, without the TSM this session would probably had me at about 18 in 5 or 6 hours, and passed out long before. Stretching the beers out, eating, etc., I watched (and remember everything), 2 movies after finally getting home. The last movie ending well after midnight. I still felt like I needed to have a beer handy while watching these 2 movies at home on the coach. Habit I guess. I just drank a whole lot slower. Baby steps I guess. 15 beers.

Sunday. Went to a noon soccer game. Another family from our neighborhood road with us. They all wanted to go eat at a steakhouse on the way home. Had to have a couple beers there. Good news, that was it for Sunday. 2 beers.

Monday. Work Dinner, free booze tonight??????? 12 beers and really feel crappy for 12 beers, especially since I did eat a big meal.

Tuesday. 6 after work. Could have been zeros. Just drinking out of habit. Stopping at 6 better than a year ago. Stopping around 18.

Wed. Same as Tuesday. 6 for no damn reason.

Thursday. 9 while shopping for special Friday tailgating event.

Friday. 18 Drinking before and after tailgating.

68 for Week 38

Christopher, been following your story from day one. I know everyone here is super-supportive, but let me be the devil's advocate here. I've got to say that I don't think TSM is working for you. I think the fact that you're thinking about your numbers explains any decrease you've experienced. I'm impressed that you've actually taken a pill before each of your hundreds of mongo drinking sessions, but you seem to blame everything on "habit" or whatever, instead of admitting that you're an alcoholic for whom Naltrexone does not work. It might be time to start looking for a "Plan B."

Whoah bkn1627...a bit harsh!

Christopher, I too have been following your progress and have to disagree. I don't see how an almost 50 percent reduction can be seen as TSM not working for you and I'm fairly sure that it can't simply be explained as being down to you "thinking about your numbers". Your progress, like many people's, may be up and down but that doesn't mean it should be discounted.You know that you are in a better place now than when you first started and that you have made inroads into identifying your triggers. You've said yourself that you now need to start breaking some of the habits associated with drinking and I'm sure that as you do that your levels will drop further.

This board is "super-supportive" but I don't see that as a bad thing. I don't see constructive criticism as a bad thing either and there's no harm in making useful suggestions. I just don't find descrptions such as "hundreds of mongo drinking sessions" to be either helpful or constructive. Just my two pennies (cents) worth.

Ruth.

Thanks Ruthy. I've got really tough skin.

bkn1627, Thanks for your honest view. I tend to agree with you. Seeing numbers still in the 60's can be a bummer still. Mongo Drinking Sessions, , yup, your pretty much correct. Still hitting those numbers, to most alkys on here is a lotta damn booze. I'm going to give this treatment at least a good year. That will put me into January 2014. I guess the thing that keeps me chugging along, and happy about my progress, is I have way fewer SUPER DUPER MONGO DRINKING SESSIONS. 2012 into 2013, drinking sessions, like my current Mongo Drinking Sessions, would begin similar as they do now, but continue and end with several gulps from my vodka stashes, along with additional beers until I reached a grey area most nights, occasional blackout levels several nights. I appreciate your straight forward opinion. I've lost my number one critic, barryb, due to his retiring, either temporarily again or possibly permanently, from this board. I thoroughly enjoyed barryb's reality check and devils advocate points of view. Hell, I need all the help I can get, positive or negative, or somewhere in between. (I look at your comment as neither, just flat out an honest opinions.)

On a different note, lets assume I fail and give this up after a year. I try baclofen, AA, or just give up and start gulping the vodka again. I at least need to be fair to the other alky's out there trying TSM like myself, or debating trying TSM. I need to document this attempt as best I can for myself, you, Ruthy, barryb, generic, Dr. Eskopa, and a few thousand more. I acknowledge that the heavy hitters like myself probably have the lowest success rate for TSM, AA, Baclofen and any other treatments.

Where I am at right now, feeling pretty good. My current thinking. I'm taking this damn pill every time before I drink now till the day I die. Maybe I die a bit younger, still pounding 60 beers a week, maybe I can reach 30 beers a week and last a bit longer. Either way, I'm thinking I may be adding a year or two or three, hitting 60 versus 180.

I know my wife has not complained about my drinking like pre-TSM during this journey. She occasionally asks how I think its going, and I tell her it is helping alot. Her comment, "I can tell it's working." That alone is enough to keep chugging along.

That being said, lets table the "Plan B" discussion until Feb. 2014.

Good for you for responding so well...your skin's definitely tougher than mine!

On a different note, can I ask a question? What's tailgating? I often read it in your posts and I've no idea what it means!

Cheers,

Ruth.

Tailgating is when a bunch of sports fans get together before and after at a sporting event, and drink beer and bbq. Usually around the back tailgate of a pickup truck, suv hatch, or trunk (i think its called a boot in the UK ) of a car.

During our local high school football season, I end up reuniting with alum and parents in a park adjacent to the football field before and after the games on Friday nights. This is one "habit" I never intend to give up. Not usually good for my weekly TSM numbers, but the reunion aspect is quite fun. So Sept thru mid Nov is what it is.

Wow, I am new to this forum but am very excited about TSM and joining the community. I am glad you have such tough skin because you have been inspirational to me and from what I have seen so far, this is working for people(and you) and takes longer for some. I have yet to find a doc that will prescribe Nal, so I haven't started. But I know that when I do, I will be in it for the long haul, because it works and it makes sense. Any advise for finding a cooperative doc? Do I have to have a script or is it possible to get Nal without one? Really anxious to get started... Again, thanks for being a strong inspiration. I love the way you responded to the devil's advocate!

Outside of a prescription, the only way to obtain naltrexone is through a foreign pharmacy. Several of us use a site called Alldaychemist. If you want to get a prescription, I would probably call around and see if you can find a local doctor who has heard of TSM. You can also check the "Sinclair Method Doctors" subforum on this site to see if anybody has shared information about a doctor near you who will help.

Christopher,
Thanks for the tailgating explanation. It sounds like fun so I can see why you wouldn't want to give it up...social drinking in it's truest form
Ruth.