Hi, all! I wanted to thank everyone for the encouragement. I am moving right along. I updated my signature for the last couple of weeks. The good news, I am bouncing in the 40’s. I am not discouraged by everything. This week has been very encouraging, on the TSM front anyway.

This week has been interesting because I am sleeping a lot. As I have noted previously, something is up when I am sleeping. Well, I have begun feeling differently about alcohol. It’s been the last few days, but something is DEFINITELY different. And different is good.

My numbers aren’t that different because earlier this week, my consumption was up. But the past couple of days have been completely different. I am not sure how long this will last, but I am not that interested in drinking. Tonight, I was annoyed when I got home. I made a crappy dinner. Ate. Then got around to opening a beer (well over an hour after the nal.) Nursed it. Decided I might like another. I am nursing it too. I know I won't open another one today.

It’s different. I like the first beer, the taste actually. I just don’t have a desire to drink much of it. So, the second seems more of a waste. It’s been a while since I felt I’d had enough early. If this is an extinction burst, no worries. It’s a nice view into the future.

Take care!

Hi HF,

Glad to hear you're experiencing some subjective changes in your attitude towards alcohol, even if the objective numbers haven't fluctuated much. In the end, it's all about how you're feeling.


What exactly do you mean by "something is up?" I too have been sleeping much more often and much more easily as TSM has progressed. I think it's because our bodies are gradually adjusting to accepting non-passed out slumber. These days, it's rare when I don't get 8+ hours of sleep each night.

Keep on keeping on. We'll get there.

-H

Great progress HF! I agree that the changes in your mind - and how compulsive your drinking FEELS - is almost if not just as important as the numbers. Obviously, for health reasons, it's good to get those numbers down, but it sounds like you're doing great and you'll totally get there!
EL

Hi, Hesster and EL!

When I start sleeping, I am rewiring. I have noticed I feel differently about everything. The first time, I quit drinking beer because I couldn’t take the taste. Then I broke the wine and hit my all time low. This time, I started sleeping and my consumption became a straight line to two beers. Weirdest thing. I like the first beer. Not much for the second beer. So, each shift in my behavior seems to start with sleeping a lot.

But, back to sleep, I haven’t slept 8 hours in years. Even when I was a teenager, I slept 5-7 hours a night. When I hit these periods I am sleeping 9-12 hours. It’s a marked difference when I hit these patches. I don't know if that makes sense to anyone?

My numbers are usually 4-7 per night. Which is significantly less than where I started six months ago. If I were to hold at 2-3 per night, I would be quite pleased. I would be well within the ULMD and could jump off the treadmill at some point soon.

I haven’t had an alcohol free day in months. But the nal no longer weighs on me. I seem to be fine with or without it. It’s like something is shifting. The proof is when I am within ULMD. Those will happen when they do. I am not forcing it.

EL, you are so right. It’s how we look at things and honestly, my viewpoint is shifting. I was afraid before I started TSM. Afraid of what would happen if this aspect of my life were known. Now that I can see light, I am not afraid. The fear is gone. It makes it easier to face everything and begin working more diligently on what I want to be. Not just the guy who drinks too much.

Good luck everyone!

FWIW, I have been incredibly sleepy since I've been on nal. It's hard to say if it's the cause (I'm generally a big sleeper when I can get it) or just a consequence of not staying out late as much. But I find myself having decreased hours of energy in general ever since I started nal...

Hi, EL! This isn't my norm, I usually follow my 5-7 hour sleep pattern. I am more rested not being hung over, but I keep hitting these longer sleep periods, and usually something good happens within the next week or so!

Might as well post my number for the week: 46. A binge over the last few weeks is 9. Which is off my highs of 16-20 drinks in a session. A normal night is 5-6 and the low is two. Two I like!

I go to sleep and am generally sober. The nights I binge, not so much. But I do like my tolerance is dropping. It almost feels like I just started this, I feel so much better today than I did before. I also can feel some changes now. That's encouraging.

And so begins week 28!

Hi HF

Well done on your progress! You are drinking half what you used to. Last year I found I slept much better than usual. I used to go thru phases where I slept badly with alarming regularity (once a month - 6 weeks), but while on nal it's been a lot less often. Having said that I haven't slept too well for the past 6 weeks. If you feel better for the extra sleep and that some rewiring is going on, it's gotta be a good thing!

Keep up the good work
Sticky

I read a thread (how's that for a rhyme?) by UKBlonde where she is discussing her new found state of mind. It touched on several things I have suspected:

1. TSM works best with moderation methods (see ElectraLou's threads, too.)
2. TSM takes a while, longer than 3-4 months.
3. At some point, alcohol loses its place as the center of life (parties, friends, etc)
4. It helps to have outside interests.
5. At some point, because of all these changes, one begins to make non drinking friends.

viewtopic.php?p=36150&sid=78b4f2ee4ce423b27c1412a95c7c90fb#p36150

HF, It's nice to see you're reaching a new stage. The "sleeping" sounds good. For me, if I'm sleeping I'm not drinking and that's all good! Also it probably means that you've reduced your alcohol intake enough where you can have a good night's sleep. Thanks for posting and for sharing your progress!

I have reached a milestone! Not one in terms of numbers, but in the perceptions by others. Tonight, I had dinner and drinks with someone from work. During the two and half hours, I had two beers (a strong IPA and pale ale.) She commented, "You don't drink very much do you?" It floored me! I just got a complement!

As long as I can remember, I drank more than anyone else! I couldn't let on how happy that made me. It took six months to get this far, but that was a huge moment. "You don't drink very much do you?"

30+ units a week is a bit much, but it isn't 90. I am not throwing up, making an ass of myself, or other negative outcomes. I came home without a buzz. I was normal again. I had dinner with with drinks. Not drinks with dinner.

I am not the drunk anymore.