Hey PJB; if you need to find 'evidence' of non-losers for whom TSM has worked, you might try taking a look at the cured list

HTH,

BWD

Trust me I have, that is why I'm committed to this for at least a year. Dealing with the element of a judgmental partner may very well be the demise of my success, therefore that element may need to be removed to ensure my best possible success.

I'm new here and maybe shouldn't speak out but could your "boyfriend" not want you to succeed for some reason? In my past experience it can be quite frightening when one partner begins to get healthy, or lose weight, or stop a behaviour that's been problematic. You might ask him if he would support you if you went to an AA meeting every night for the next year? Or went into rehab for 3 months? Or took a drug to help you stop drinking that HE has heard of and that HE approves of?

You might be surprised to find that he would not support you no matter what you do.

I hope this doesn't offend you. You sound very determined but from what you have said he is undermining you at every turn. If he loves you and wants what's best for YOU ask him to stop commenting at all for the next 3 months - just as a test so that you can give naltrexone a good try without his constant carping. The fact that he comments negatively all the time just makes you focus on what you drink instead of getting on with your life!

Hope this works out for you.

Thx, Revert, it is beyound frustrating, since he knows iv travellrd down those roads before. Iv now been given an ultimatum to stop for one week. He doesnt want me to live a life of sobriatry, but wants his plan to make me a social drinker on his terms or method. He clearly dosnt understand addiction although he thinks he does just because he knows some people in AA. I am going to try for four days AF, nevertheless. The most frustrating thing is to him its ok smoke pot, which i dont do and he can do cocaine when he chooses, neither addictive for him, he just uses his ADD as an reason. Its all good, maybe the force AF days will bring me closer to my goal. The one thing i said and wont deviate from is TSM, no matter how long it takes and with or without him. Tomorrow will be my first attempt nit drinking, wish me luck i know its going to be very hard! Sorry for typos, im using my iphone

Hi all, I just hit the 3 1/2 month point. Yesterday was my first AF day, felt nice knowing with conviction I wasn't going to drink and again no nal at 5:00 a.m this morning. I would like to give myself full credit, but this result came as a command from my boyfriend. More amazing and challenging was the fact he walked in the door with a case of water and a 30 pack of coors. I looked at him and said you must be kidding, my first attempt at a full day and eve without al and you walk in with that. I expressed that just knowing its here is an issue and he said its for July 4th which will start on my boat tonight and all day Wednesday. Got to love a challenge, I'm told to give him a week without drinking and I get to watch all our friends on dock party. It's also nice to hold back amazingly calm last night while he gets high on he one hitters. I have not decided if I will drink tonight or Wednesday, will play by ear. Knowing him, he will allow given the holiday, than command another AF week. The positive for me is that I do feel better knowing that if I do choose to start implementing AF days it not only helps my progress but makes mr feel more empowered in myself. Will perserve.

P

PJB you are quite a gal. I would have tossed him out on his ear. Sabotage is at work there for sure but I guess you have to deal with these things as it's your life!!

I hope you have the AF days you want for your own sake - they will give you some courage and strength. And maybe will enable you to see things around you in a different light? Even if you decide that this pressure is too much and you will wait until after the holidays to be AF that is also a sound plan - because it will be YOUR plan and one that makes the most sense to you.

Have a wonderful holiday no matter what YOU decide

It's fourth of July, on my boat with my puppies and not the verbally abusive boyfriend. He layed into me so badly yesterday, I left my home and plan on staying on the boat for a few days. He still demands that TSM is a hoax and demanded I come up with one physical person he can talk to. He simple wants to controll me and the issue of my addition. I know and feel NAL working and can't believe his judgmental additude. He thinks he can say when and when I can't drink. Just doesn't get or believe this is possible. He actually thinks everyone on this forum are posers behind a keyboard. I've expressed that I've gained so much knowledge and support and it's beyond positive compared to AA, which I will never do again. Hopefully he will just move out of my home.

Jeez PBJ that's rough with the BF. Just stay strong because you know you are trying to take positive steps towards a healthier future, whether or not he sees that is his issue. It sounds like he's not healthy for you though! I get that people are resistant to understanding it because the model has always been to just quit (yah, just quit why don't you! ha). People don't understand and that's okay. We understand! I have purposely not told anyone about nal because I know it would be met with resistance and I just want to be able to work on it without judgment. That being said, I don't have a partner who lives with me so it's easy to go about my own business. Keep at it!

It's amazing I feel I only value this forum and my freinds I can turn to, all of you! I'm a bit concerned, if I'm doing TSM properly. It's been 3 1/2 months, went from 50ish units to 40ish and only 1AF day. I take my 50 mg each morning as I'm a morning drinker. Huge responsible job, but still feel the need to have a couple beers before work or wine. End of day I usually have about 3 to 4 drinks. Here is my concern. From earlier post you know I don't have the adequate support from boyfriend, but I must say he is correct in that since I started TSM, I continue to drink daily, is that normal? Further, I feel my alcoholism is beginning to become apparent to those close to me. I must admit, I've been in many high level social situations, thats my world, but I have acted beyond odd. Sitting in limo and I start to hyperventalate but I know I'm not really hyperventilating, I just do it aware but can't stop it. I have been in social situations where I seem perfectly fine and then my boyfriend says I just turn and I say and do things I can't beleive, he has recorded, nice reflection. Blackouts I guess? I'm wondering if I'm doing this correctly, take my 50 mg in morning is that enough in my system when I drink throughout day? I assume it's in my system, so even if I take in morning and don't start drinking till noon, it's ok????? I've read so many post about roller coaster ride, is this what is going on? I've invested everything in TSM and just feel doubtful at this point. I try to be realistic in the fact I've drank for over 25 years and maybe it will be a slow process. Am I doing this correctly or am I just doomed? Btw, my boyfriend is a very good person and comes from a family that knows nothing of my addication and thinks the world of me. I have been fortunate in all my life and all I've accomplished, yet I have a horrible disease of addiction. Just wondering if I'm f....ing up the correct process?

PJB, you do sound confused this weekend. I hear in your voice all the pressure you're under. You are doing TSM properly but as you drink during the day, and then continue on later you may want to think about taking another .50 nal in the early evening. Someone else may join in on this and say if they think this is a good idea. And 3 1/2 months is NOT long enough to be worried - keep going, you are actually doing very well.

My Dear, your units ARE DOWN so don't fret - TSM is working for you. But let's face it those of us who have been drinking for many years (me included, and your 25 are nothing to the years I've been drinking.) we may have a long time yet before we feel totally in control.

So yes, it is normal for you to continue to drink daily if that has been your pattern. One nal in the morning and one in the early evening should cover all your drinking.

If people you are close to are noticing your drinking and you are worrying about odd behaviour in social situations could you cut back and have more "down time" so you can get a grip on yourself? You seem very stressed and unsure. Take a step back and be good to yourself - you have a busy life with a big job, a boyfriend who is not supportive and seems abusive - you need some TLC and if there is nobody to give it to you then it's up to you.

I've got to say again that if you could get away from your "boyfriend" you might be under less stress. I think - and I don't want to hurt your feelings - but I really feel he is not on your side here. Why would he not want to help you? Why is he only pointing out your odd behaviour? You say he is a good person but from what you say he's not helping you.

You and he may have a long history of bad situations with your drinking. I don't know. But I do know that I hear lots of stress and sadness in your "voice." And I wish I could help you in someway. Please keep in touch and let us know how you are daily.