Hi Eric - sorry to hear about the saucy pub excursion. Was this your first time drinking on Nal in public? Trust me when I say that it happens to the best of us (even those of us several months into TSM), and by making some small changes you can greatly reduce your chances of entering "complete ass" territory.

The first is to try to avoid the hard stuff. I noticed that you started off with pints, which is smart (and I imagine this was part of your tactic to "ease into the drinking). I'm sure you were feeling pretty good (and pretty confident) at this point, so that's when you introduced the whiskeys. Then the double-whiskeys. And then...the kiss of death...Jaeger.

No one can survive multiple Jaeger Bombs, no matter how practiced you are at TSM. We always used to get on Ketchikan1's case about her affinity for the black crack, and once she completely cut it out of her drinking life, she made some drastic strides with TSM*. I too am still guilty of switching to hard stuff once I hit a groove and feel like I'm drinking confidently, and it almost always ends up as a sh*tshow.

*Obviously, there were some other (much more) significant factors, but I'd like to think that avoiding Jaeger helped.

As I'm sure you've read in other threads, TSM can be a rollercoaster, and this is likely your first of several climbs. Please do not be discouraged, since we've all been there. Just keep up with the protocol, and you'll be in good shape a few months down the road. I'd hate to advise anyone to drink more often, but you may find that the extinction process will work faster if you schedule more drinking sessions. There are a couple of different schools of thought on the process, and if I can find one such discussion thread, I'll post it here.

Anyway, hang in there and best of luck to you, Eric.

-H

Eric, Hesster has summed up very well what I would say to you also. You are at the very beginning of what might be a long journey...or short? That's the only predictable thing about TSM: the complete unpredictablity! Which can be good news/bad news: yes, reading Ketchikan's sudden breakthrough has been a thrill for all of us here. Our Jaeger Poster Girl, no more!

Nal on, and keep us posted...

Chrissie

Thanks Hesster and Chrissie for the advice and encouragement. Yes, this was my first public session with Nal, I think I will try to drink less, more often. I wish they had a pill for the regret, guilt, and self loathing...

Eric, some of us are daily drinkers and some of us are binge drinkers, but I know we ALL understand that sentiment...hang in there, buddy. Though I'm not yet where I want to be w/ TSM, my progress is such that those days are very rare at this point!

Chrissie

My last Nal was on Sunday that I took so I could drink a couple of glasses of wine to aid the hang over and calm the nerves and put me to sleep. So today (Tuesday) I was feeling better so I left work a bit early and rode my bike to the gym and did my leg work out and then rode the bike home (about 6 miles). So I get home and I am elated. I can't believe the good mood that I am in. So, I take it that this is the result of having sensitive endorphin receptors in response to having the Nal blocking them since Saturday?
Wow...I went from feeling sorry for myself to feeling like I could conquer the world in an hour and a half! I usually get a lift from my workouts but I haven't had a lift like this in years.

Anyone else experience this?

Hi Eric - you're likely experiencing the "opioid up-regulation" phenomenon. This is both a blessing and a curse to TSM'ers. The positive is that endophin-producing activities like exercise and sex can feel even more pleasurable after a Naltrexone dose has run its course, but so can drinking while not on Nal. This is the reason why alcoholism can re-establish itself even after a TSM patient has declared being "cured" (if he/she starts drinking again regularly without Nal).

Regardless, as long as you plan on properly medicating, you should consider up-regulation as additional positive reinforcement during your treatment.

I'm glad to hear you rebounded nicely after your rough day/night at the pub.

-H

Welcome Eric, and sorry to hear that you had a promising start followed by a bit of a nightmare evening. Trust me, we've ALL been there. The bad news is it will likely happen again throughout the months of TSM. The good news is that every drinking session is bringing you one step closer to extinguishing your triggers. Nal doesnt' work great as an anti-craving drug - we seem to respond to that aspect of it but develop tolerance very quickly. What it will do is sort of behind the scenes...often you'll think you're not making progress but your brain will be subtly rewiring itself. Avoiding the hard stuff is a good idea, although not necessary (I'm inching my way towards cured and I almost exclusively drink bourbon). For now, you shouldn't worry too much about adding in willpower and moderation techniques, but they might come in handy down the road.
Welcome and good luck,
EL

Thanks for the encouragement EL and Hesster.

In keeping with my new plan I took my Nal last night and had two glasses of wine, almost had to force them down and then felt strange and tired and crashed on the Lazyboy early. Don't know what the difference was between that and what happened on Saturday but I will keep this in memory.

I thought I would throw out a little wisdom nugget from my Franklin planner:

Man is not made for defeat. A man can be destroyed, but not defeated.

Eric

Not a bad week. Had to go to Memphis on Monday for a meeting and since I have to be back next Monday decided to take a few days of vacation so I headed down to my daughter's house in AL for a few days. Here is my weekly consumption, all with Nal:

Friday night two glasses of wine
Sunday night three bottles of Corona to wash down my tacos for my diet free night.
AF Monday and Tuesday...I actually said no to the free booze on the flight from London...Hmmmmm
Wednesday night two beers with hot wings, steak, and beans.
Tonight I meet up with the old gang for a few drinks...I was thinking about going AF but I think I will Nal and maybe have 2-3. I will end up having to drive and I am still on probation for a couple of more months in AL so it will likely be 2 light beers.

So far I have had no cravings to binge but it's hard to judge, when they hit it usually comes out of nowhere.

I am feeling pretty good despite the jet lag and have hit the gym three days in a row. Cardio on Tuesday at the hotel and then legs yesterday and chest today. It's good to be in the old gym, better weight selection and a leg press sled.

Next week I have meetings all week in Memphis with the manager crew so it will be beers every night and Beal street is a huge trigger for me. The Blues just go better with Jack Daniels.

Current goal is to avoid binging till I get back to London.

My diet is going pretty good except for lunch on Tues which was catered and all there was was sandwiches so I carb'd out a bit. All in all I am pretty happy as usually when I travel I eat like crap.

Had a weird night last night. Took my nal, drank two beers and a cocktail before dinner. Ate dinner and had two glasses of wine. Then we went down on Beale street and went to the Absinthe bar and enjoyed an absinthe. Then off to my favorite little blues bar on Beale for a some fantastic music and three more beers. Didn't feel too drunk but I blacked out and lost most of the last hour of the night. Didn't do anything crazy and all night was good and mellow. I felt in complete control of my drinking and could have stopped at any time. Woke up this morning and I am a bit hungover but mostly just tired from lack of sleep. I am also fighting a cold and taking cold meds.

So I had nine drinks in six hours and blacked out? Is anyone else noticing that tolerance levels have decreased on Nal?

Here are my numbers since my last post:

Thursday three beers
Friday two beers
Saturday-Wed AF
Thursday 9 (Five beers, two wine, one whiskey cocktail, one absinthe)

Ok...Back to London tonight, you know London? Fish, Chips, cup o' tea, bad food, worse weather, Mary F-ing Poppins, London!

Take Care everyone and keep taking your Nal...I think it's working!

Eric