80's - It feels like a waste right now because you are so new to TSM. In the beginning, TSM doesn't have a stark impact other than the honeymoon phase. Then it seems like it doesn't work because you notice you are drinking the same or similar. The Nal+Al does work and you will find yourself regaining control. Focus on the small changes in the beginning and praise yourself for those as this is a long and bumpy ride.

The great thing about this board is I can reread everything. You are quite right MPLSnick, in that I drank about half I would on a typical binge, and should feel very grateful. Ahhh Clarity!

I wish the hangover weren't quite so severe. Ouchies. I usually only feel this bad after about two bottles or so. The good thing though is it is giving me time to read all the stories on the board. I'm hoping by around noon I can be back to actually working. Having a work from home situation certainly comes in handy sometimes.

Hello board,

I'm been on vacation from work visiting friends for the last week, and I was a bit nervous because I also came to celebrate a friend's birthday. I took nal as usual, and have been able to keep myself to 4 units a day. This might not seem like much, but I'm really proud.

I only had one night (night of the birthday) where I over-indulged, but was happy to notice I always stayed 1-2 drinks behind everyone. I haven't been hungover at all.

The side effects are gone, and I'm awaiting the dreaded "extinction burst" but so far so good!

80s

This is excellent progress. It's easy to take TSM for granted. Think of how much better you are now already and you are just weeks into the process. Maybe you won't have an "extinction burst" -- not everybody does.

My best,

Nick

Good deal 80's - You are seeing the small progress that is so refreshing after years of drinking until your either stumbling around saying and doing stupid things or passed out. I don't remember more than one night of "too drunk" since I started Nal. At week 15 I still drink way too much but what is so cool is that my nights are not dictated by alcohol like they used to be. I don't get drunk, I don't yell, I don't fight, I don't stumble, I don't drive drunk, and I don't slur my words (who knows about next week though as I'm still early in the game). Enjoy the small steps towards regaining control. It is a bumpy ride but not one without its significant up periods from time to time.

Nick couldn't have said it better. I can't tell you how many days I spent in bed hung over, hating every inch of myself. Trust the process to work--it will get better. Maybe not as perfect as we'd like but definitely better than it was before.

I binged last night, and although I knew this was likely to happen I still feel horrible. The guy I'm dating looked at me with disdain this morning, and told me how much he just wanted me to pass out because I was being hostile. As we have a long distance relationship this isn't really good news to hear.

I was apparently hostile, chain smoking, and scaring the dog. Wonderful traits any man wants to see in his girlfriend. Uggh. I know TSM is meant to work slowly, but I can't take the roller coaster, I'm just not patient or strong enough.

I really just want to stop drinking completely, I'm not sure if forever but for a while. I want to workout everyday, I want to have stellar performance reviews at work. I want this guy to propose and tell me I'm the best woman he's ever met. I want to be happy. I feel as far away from this as possible, as I lay in his bed borrowing his computer to type out how much of a loser I am to the masses.

I don't have 6-12 months, I'm going to wreck my life if I keep this up in a matter of weeks. I don't know what to do. I feel like an idiot being only 26 and having this problem. Shouldn't these be my golden years? WTF am I doing!

I'm not sure what I want to gain from this rant, outside of bursting into tears. I don't know what to do. I'm miserable.

80s

Hi 80s Baby,
Welcome to the roller coaster ride of TSM. I know I will be only one of many who is going to tell you you had an "extinction burst" last night and just stay with the program. It is rough when you have a bad night and everyone of us can relate to the horrible feeling of self loathing you are feeling today. You are not alone. And you are not a bad person, the alcohol is bad.
While I understand that you want your relationship to work and your boyfriends disdain is painful you need to take care of YOU first. Hang tight!
Best Wishes!

Yes, TSM is a roller coaster. You had the honeymoon and now the spike or "extinction burst." This is proof positive TSM is working for you. If your BF is a good man -- and I'm sure he is -- he admires you for admitting that you have an issue and for taking a proactive role in putting a stop to it.

My best,

Nick

Hi 80's - So sorry that happened to you. I feel for you and relate. How about the time I jumped my teenage daughter in a drunken rage and choked her. I'm lucky she didn't call the police. Talk about scaring the dog....how about your kids?! You definitely had an extinction burst. That is a good sign, not a bad one. I know this roller coaster ride is hard, but you will get there. At about 8 weeks my family stopped noticing and commenting on my drinking. I still drink way too much (5 units a night), but Nal has given me control at 15 weeks. I don't get drunk. I don't rant and rave. I don't scare my kids or get hostile with my husband. I know I have a ways to go yet because I still crave alcohol and I still drink too much, but even this short time with TSM I've seen remarkable improvement. You will too. Just hang in there. The embarrassing moments will be less and less as you go through each week and soon your BF will no longer be afraid when he sees you pick up a drink.