spbx,
I can relate to your 9/11 story.... and my drinking increased and stayed up after that tragic event. Sounds like you have been and are going through a lot.
OK, so a couple of things. Since you didn't say we'll assume you are taking the full 50mg of Nal. If you've read other posts here you will see that people have a wide range of reactions when first taking Nal but almost always these reactions go away within the first week, two or worst case three. The nausea, trouble sleeping and dreams are very common. Some reduce their dosage to 25mg or as low as 12.5mg in the beginning just to reduce the side affects then build back up to the 50mg as tolerated.
The golden rule is Nal + 1hr if you are going to drink - never deviate from this rule! However waiting to drink past the hour is ok (your 2.5 hour wait was ok). I generally take another Nal if I'm going to be/continue drinking after 5 hours (this doesn't happen very often since I am quite capable of doing all the damage in the first few hours!).
Did you notice any changes in how alcohol affected you after starting the Nal? Like was the "rush" or "buzz" reduced or never achieved? While drinking on the Nal did you ever think/feel that you could take or leave that next glass of wine?
TSM is a gradual process taking many, many, many months. In a nut shell the idea is to deprive your brain from the good feeling (the rush/buzz) alcohol delivers. So your brain craves alcohol less. You drink less. You repeat this process over time - And eventually you can decide to abstain or your're comfortable with a much lower alcohol consumption. You should read all the posts here and get the Eskapa book, Second Edition, so you have a solid TSM foundation.
http://www.amazon.com/The-Cure-Alcoholi ... alcoholismIt's also very common for a drastic reduction in drinking not to occur from day one of taking Nal, in fact, it's rare that this happens. I notice you have 2's in week 1 and 2 - that's a huge reduction in drinking on those days!
Next - you're not a looser! Based on your brief story I'd say you are already a winner and finding TSM and deciding to get with the program only tells me you want to change your relationship with alcohol and you have the strength and fortitude to do it!
Lastly - I feel the tension as 9/11 approaches. Every year since that horrible event I would drink more in the days prior and especially on 9/11. I would start drinking at 8am while watching the moment by moment repeat on NY television - I mentally relive that day hour by hour and the feelings are as real today as they were on that day 12 years ago. I'm going to try (I hope I can do this) to break that pattern this Wednesday by going to Eagle Rock to pay my respect instead of cracking open a bottle of wine at 8am. I think I have the strength to do that this year. If I don't I'll be taking my Nal and hoping for the best.
Hang in there spbx!
Rich