If you didn't answer "drinking", and your not on the Cured List, you're not being honest.

I once read a book about alcoholism with the title: "Drinking: A Love Story". It's not about Nal, (though an enjoyable read), but the title is what I love, because it's the truth.

You're here because you've spent years and years, and countless hours every week, with complete love and devotion, pursuing your hobby. You plan everything about your hobby with meticulous (and even scientific detail), from procurement, to the proper environment, to all the required accoutrements to make your drinking experience the best it can be.

And now, you are going to give it up. All those hours, all those resources, all that energy, -poof! The love of your life, -gone!

I bring this up (as I have previously) because for all the newbies, you must find other activities to fill the vast vacuum in your life that you will be creating by giving up your treasured hobby. It is never too early to start planning, -even if it seems impossible to visualize at your current stage. Nal works, and you will succeed, but only if you follow the golden rule and find ways to fill the vacuum with fulfilling activities.

That's my advice for today. I am so happy to be rid of that terrible hobby, but when I started Nal, I never would have believed I'd type those words. Good luck!

Precisely

Like that toxic former boyfriend/girlfriend , once it's over, you wonder what the hell you were so fixated on and in love with

Well said !!

I had loads of hobbies and other things just waiting for me to get my alcohol under control, and now my time is filled - but I also value time doing nothing, just being with me.

Haha. The toxic girlfriend metaphor played in my head. Now when I bump in to her, I can talk and laugh and walk away with NO emotional pain. Maybe a little nostalgic longing but nothing like the suicidal hurt. I like to imagine that it bugs her to have lost her control over me.

I sold 3 old motorcycles and bought an old Honda PC800 and a new Moto Guzzi Norge. Very busy fussing over them. Sort of pre-rewarding myself for good behavior. Too bad can't post pic.

Derrida (on a reading of Freud) claims that thinking in language - "hearing oneself speak" - is talking to a simulated girlfriend (or person of the opposite sex) in the head. I am pretty sure that Derrida's book, "The Post Card" is a series of self-addressed postcards to his internal girl. Usually this person chides as much as they comfort - indeed that is their function as part of the super ego - but with the help of alcohol, all they do is comfort. Ms Toxic becomes all nice and caring.

When I went mad, when I was 22, I found this simulated toxic girlfriend inside my head. For a long time I thought it was just me, but eventually realised that both Freud and Derrida are saying the same thing.

So the metaphor may not be just a metaphor.

I try to chant the name of the Amida Buddha over and over again (which can get dull!), and I can appreciate the rational of talking to Jesus, or the Holy Spirit, instead of Ms. Toxic.

I was going to start a separate thread on the fact that the drugs nal or naf are not available where I am but I can see the point. It seems Ms Toxic is going to be with me for a while to come.

Stumbled upon this and had to post.

Ha very clever and true. You collect all the special glasses, the Pilsner glass, The crystal wine glasses, the shot glasses and so on. I also have one of them fancy silver flasks for when away from the bars or the booze cabinet on a hike or something like that. It IS a hobby!

Funny thing is I do have loads of actual hobbies. The problem is I do it all while drinking. So for me drinking is definitely a hobby but I use it as an accompaniment to all the others.