I’ve worked for years at an inner city ER and trauma center (I’m an RN) in Texas. Every night, alcohol plays a major role in the reasons people come to us. In the “battle” with alcohol, the top five ways that people “lose” are:
1. Traumatic death (car wrecks, accidents, drownings, suicide, etc…)
2. Liver cirrhosis or liver cancer
3. GI bleeding (blood pouring out your mouth or your butt)
4. Pancreatitis or pancreatic cancer
5. Going to jail or prison due to causing a traumatic death (drunk driving, murder)

This week, I was struck by two celebrities who suffered #5. The first, of course, was Olympian Oscar Pistorius who shot and killed his girlfriend, apparently after going into a fit of rage. I don’t know whether he was drunk or not, but the odds are very great that he was (the majority of domestic abuse is linked to alcohol and drugs). The second, less publicized event, struck me in a much deeper way. Amy Locane-Bovinizer, actress and one of the original cast members of Melrose Place, was sent to prison for three years in the DUI death of a 60 year old woman. The pictures of these two celebrities in their moment of despair is moving.

http://worldnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013 ... riend?lite

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/m ... -1.1264538

I want to focus on Amy, since I’ve committed the same crime as her probably more often than she has. She states that she had five drinks. She was driving home and sideswiped a car; the driver of that car started to pursue her so she drove fast on a residential road until she t-boned a car pulling into their driveway after an evening out. The 60 year old wife and mother died shortly thereafter.

The scripture passage that comes to mind is, “There but for the grace of God go I.” I reject that notion, though. It wasn’t grace that kept me from causing a similar disaster – as though God controlled my car when I was drunk. I would argue that it was nothing but chance or randomness that separates Amy from myself and the rest of us here who have done this action so many times.

The U.S. penal system (and many of our parents), often punish the consequences of actions more than the actions themselves. Amy and I did the exact same action – drank and then drove. She caused an accident and is going to jail; I didn’t and remain free. If she had hit a tree instead of a car, she would probably have gotten off without much punishment at all. But, still, it was the same action.

I have told a few close people about my changed drinking habits and, to a person, they say they’re “proud” of me. As others have posted here before, others see quitting alcohol as “cool,” and ex-drinkers often carry this as a badge of honor. Amy, though, becomes a villain purely by chance.

I felt great compassion for her when I read that story. Just looking at her face really touched me. It was a Buddhist moment of sorts: Not “there but for the grace of God go I,” but “THERE I GO.” That was me in the courtroom getting convicted.

Healthcare workers tend to be quite callous, especially towards drinkers who “do it to themselves.” I remember one night this guy came in completely, slobbering drunk after crashing into a tree. His lower leg was snapped and in a right angle (hit foot was pointing away from his body, looking grotesque). The chaplain, of all people, didn’t want to have anything to do with this guy and nobody was too keen about giving him pain medicine. “He doesn’t deserve any compassion, he did this to himself.” I said to the chaplain, “That’s exactly why he needs compassion. We all do stupid things to hurt ourselves – one way or another.”

Ignorance, a lack of freedom, addictions, overwhelming desires that lead us to hurt ourselves and others – these are all forms of intense suffering. May we all have greater compassion for other brothers and sisters who suffer from alcohol addiction despite their heroic efforts to be set free. May TSM slowly but surely give us this freedom and may we use that freedom wisely and for the good of our family and those whose paths we cross.

Hi Barry,

Thank you for this interesting post. Thought I'm not sure I understand what your point is, other than praying that TSM will bring freedom to those who do it. Maybe that is your purpose ? I'll second that :0)

Ignorance and lack of freedom are probably the two major problems for people with alcohol problems. Most people just don't know what their treatment options are, heck, most doctors don't even know! They think there is just AA. Worse, folks in the US are court ordered to AA!

I'm for Freedom of Information and Freedom of Choice! (of treatment options for alcohol dependency)

Curi

ADDENDA:
So, two nights ago, I'm working at the hospital. Around 4:00AM, a very drunk man drives the wrong way on the freeway and slams head first into a car driving the correct direction. Both of them come to the hospital. Of course, drunk guy (as usual) is barely injured. The other guy, a young family man out doing his job, ended up with a devastating brain injury and was being kept alive for the purpose of organ donation. Drunk guy got discharged home (sure, he'll probably face some legal trouble, but he's currently free and doing just fine -- he's probably drinking right now).

I did not feel "one" with the drunk guy. Actually, he pissed me off and I thought of him as a "piece of sh*t." Not sure what to think (maybe it was because Amy was so pretty?).