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I'm curious about what the consensus is regarding the length of time that must pass before you and/or society considers a person to be abstinent.

Bob

Hmmm. 18 reads and only 3 responses including myself. I would have thought most people would at least have an opinion on this question.

Bob

the way I see it, if a person types AF next to a week, they declare themselves to have been abstinent for a day. I mean they abstained for a day right? To me this whole business of "how long have you been without any drink whatsoever" is A.A. talk. they speak of a one day relapse as if it were a great shame. bull. I think quality of life is most important myself and I'm chasing the improvements I've read about in yours and others' posts here. regardless of whether or not I remain totally abstinent for any arbitrary period of time

I said 3 months, but why do you care? It's just another label. What I love about TSM/NAL is that it helps us move past the simple dichotomy that's dominated alcohol treatment for a century, namely alcohol = bad, abstinence = good. TSM stresses that control, not necessarily abstinence, is the goal.

That said, if you've been abstinent and that's working out, more power to you!

I don't know that there is an answer to this Bob. Seems it's like trying to predict the weather. I voted 3 months, but I would think it really depends on the person. From what I've read, many in the AA crowds say that 1yr is the mark you need to hit.

I went abstinent for several months, then out of the blue one day I wanted some scotch with a buddy, so I had some (after taking Nal of course). Since then (July), I'm back abstinent again. This is the real beauty of our cure. Me having some scotch with a buddy would have been considered a relapse with the AA crowd, which would probably have been true. Given my old cravings, I would not have stopped at 2 tumblers.

Q

Thanks for the votes and the comments.

The question is not for me, per se. It is for answering some uncomfortable upcoming medical questions. I know I am sober. At least I can answer that one honestly.

I voted for 3 months AF and you're abstinent. I know the AA answer is a year, but I really don't care what they think at all. Unfortunately, much AA dogma has spilled into general society, so I was curious what the rational people here think.

Bob

PS Good to here from you ~Q~! I see myself heading in the direction you have gone. I'll likely be AF for a long while then have a TSM drink in some social setting one day, then go back to being AF. That is the reality of my life now.

Hi Bob,

I had to really think about that question for some time. Im gonna have to go with 1 year. My reasoning is, 3 months is a nice white knuckled accomplishment for a binge drinker. One could argue 6 months, but would you really be abstinent or just waiting for a good excuse to drink?

After a year, a person would probably have encountered many situations that would lead to drinking. During that year, and encountering those situations, a person would most likely have developed new and different ways to cope, or new AF activities all together. Even a new way of acting in social setting, such as parties or get togethers that a person would normally drink at and your choosing diet coke as your beverage of choice. When it becomes somthing you just dont do anymore, rather than avoiding, that would, in my opinion be abstinence.

just my thoughts.

I appreciate the comments and the votes for those thoughtful enough to participate.

I am going to ask some non-drinkers and see what their response is. My guess is that it will be 1 year.

BTW, the State of Florida considers abstinence to be 2 consecutive years.

Bob

OK. It's settled.

One year is the amount of time for not doing something that makes a person abstinent.

This poll and some reasoning about other behaviors has lead me to the conclusion that 1 year is a well accepted benchmark.

Whether it's coffee, tobacco, gambling, sex, alcohol, marijuana, or meat. If you don't partake of these in the last year, then the general population considers you as abstinent or them. Some are "vices", some are not, but they all seem to have the same period of time that must pass before an abstinent state is achieved.

Bob

I just voted for the one year period too . But i'm still wondering about to who it matters .
If you have to heed the opinion of an insurer or other external monitor of progress made, it clearly can't be discounted . But as always if you know yourself that you no longer mis behave no one will take away that gift . The greatest satisfaction is internal , in the meantime
we must hope that the external assessors catch up with tsm and mindshift out of the abstinece is all view .