Oh UKB - I am truly so happy for you - it all sounded just wonderful - the hen night and the wedding too!!! I also am really pleased that your hubs is so on board with you and the drinking and that he is so upfront about how he feels - (just curious - why did HE have a drink then?). Anyway - just really happy for you both - all the best for a very long and happy life together !!!!

HUGS to you, Maggie xxx

UK Blonde -

Congratulations on your marriage. and more so on your strength on your wedding day and week. I am still so new into this that I just cannot stop admiring people like yourself who have gotten AL under control. The AL is just damn convincing! You just beat these familiar thoughts!

I am just gonna have one to celebrate a wedding!
Oh , wait, just one to celebrate the bride,
just one to celebrate the groom,
how about the grooms mom?,
hey, and ain't that bridesmaid worth toasting?!
Wow, the band is awesome!
I'll drink to that!
etc, etc , etc,

You go girl!!!
I can say you are one of my many heroes on this forum and are such an inspiration!

I think he had a total of 3 drinks all day.

Neighbours brought champagne for a toast after their work on the garden. He'll have had no more than one small glass.

He then had a glass of wine with welcome drinks, and a glass of champagne for the toast.

I think that was it!

He likes wine, was a member of a two wine clubs when we met. At the moment there are weeks, probably several weeks when he doesn't drink at all. I can't remember when he was last drunk, probably a year or two ago when he met up with his boss who is a heavy drinker.

I've not imposed a no-drinking rule, very happy that he's reduced to this level.

PS I used to really resent it if he went out for one drink, I'm a lot better about that now and realised that was more me than him.

Couple of drinks a week, mostly not even in my company, sometimes no drinking at all, no drunkeness, I'll take him!

Congratulations on your marriage! Your wedding sounds lovely. I have only been on this forum for a short time but know by the way you share and support that you deserve a lifetime of happiness.

Ukblonde,

I want to congratulate you and wish you and you hubby a happy life. It sounds like you waited for the right guy!

As I read over these pages I was in tears for you and then when you announced your engagement and then wedding (which sounded perfect), I understood why you were struggling. The strength that you had to realize you were using food in place of al was inspiring. I had an e.d. and then turn to al for comfort. I now realize that you always have to be on your toes and watch for old habits to come back. I wanted to thank you for sharing, for I know it wasn't easy.

Wishing you happiness,

Jaba

Yes, what is the concept, that there is always an addiction behind the addiction. Good grief. Can' we ever get a break???

Still super happy for you though UKB!! Hope that honeymoon is still going on strong!! XOXO Newlife

I now believe that certainly for me there is something under it, a deep yearning for something and I'm understanding it more and more each day.

I also think that because I've chosen abstenance and a completely drug free life apart from some caffiene which I control, plus training in a discipline which requires a lot of deep self-reflection that I am going down a very hard and raw path. I don't make it easy for myself!

We had a night away, but had to come back because I had some deadlines to finish some coursework for, and he is constantly required to be in touch with his work. We do see each other quite a lot for most couples because we both work/study/operate from our home.

Got a weekend away at an event next weekend, which will be honeymoon 2.

I know what you mean about the yearning.

Sounds wonderful!! Newlife

I've been thinking about my relationship with food, this week although the idea to eat junk/chocolate etc has been there, I have decided not to. I have noticed that the longer I go without succumbing, the more I get used to not and the more I don't. It feels like the sort of things Guapo says about changing habits.

A few tools I use are thinking about how rubbish I'll feel afterwards, ashamed, guilty, how rubbish and how much better I feel even though I dislike hunger, when I'm not stuffed full. The longer I go on without the blow outs, the less I want to have one.