I know that there must be couples out there who are reading these posts but just haven't said anything. My spouse and I are both are tsm. What are you going through? Is one more open and excited about this cure than the other? Do you worry that maybe the other is falling down the abyss and you can't reach them? They don't eat, they always sleep, their actions are irrational and they're just wasting away. They don't do anything to help themselves and you keep hoping they're taking NAL before they drink. Won't you take the leap and join in?

Hi corkit,
My husband drinks, but not often. Never more than 2 beers at a time. God, I wish I could do that! I'm the one with the problem -- and it's lonely. Not that I wish I were married to someone with the same issue, but at least you can support each other in your road to recovery. Providing both of you want to do so, I guess.

On the other hand, maybe it makes it even more difficult, I don't know. What's your story?

my story . . . i guess you'd say i'm a functional AL and not so with my husband, he's more of a 24/7 you know hiding bottles of vodka everywhere, not eating, sick. It got so bad last year we separated for 7 mo. and i have to say the time apart was great and yet not, the overriding problem is i love him and i always feel like i have to take care of him because he won't. I really think if God didn't direct me to tsm it wouldn't be long until i lost him. I can't describe how awful it is watching someone you love slowly dying in front of your eyes. But tsm. He's taking the pill and hopefully taking it correctly so I'm always asking him if he is, anyway as long as he's taking it. What's so sad is he's brilliant the most intelligent man i've ever met and now he can't remember what happened 15 min. ago. I get so angry with him that i think why can't he shape up i do I support the two of us with my career and then i think we're all caught up with this thing called AL differently. I can't tell you how I hate it!!

ok, enough of the sad story i'm sure some of you could put me to same with your story. my husband and i have a long way to go on this journey but at least we're not standing still.

I'm sorry I don't have much productive to add, but I just had to comment that I've been so incredibly amazed and moved by the stories of couples supporting each other through their problems and with TSM on this forum. I think there have been about three posters who were untouched by alcohol themselves but were supporting their partners through it.

There are so many wonderful human beings here

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Aww, corkit, how hard that must be for you, to have to rudder two ships instead of one. How long has your DH been taking the nal? I commend you for your caring and I hope you can master this demon together.

Both of us started taking the NAL 2 weeks ago. He seems to be doing the NAL correctly but I 'm gone during the day and he's at home, so I can only go by what he's telling me. He seems to be on board with tsm knowing if it doesn't work what the outcome will be, not good, so like with everything else in my life I can only place this too in God's hands.

For anyone who doesn't want to read this turn away now! I'm going to vent. my husband is angry with me anytime i bring up tsm, he's always secretive and never wants to talk about it though i know he's taking it. he says nothing tastes right from food to drink but he talks his half a Nal every morning to start the day and another in the afternoon to continue on drinking until night. i know he hates that i go on this board but he has no interest in posting himself. i just hope that when i cured i still have a desire to be here with him.

Sorry, corkit...do you think your husband is still in denial about his addicition to alcohol? Maybe he is just not at the point where he wants to do something about it, and he probably feels threatened that you are actively seeking treatment. Perhaps he is also worried about losing a drinking partner. If you become cured, then where does that leave him? Especially if he doesn't want to stop. I think TSM is about more than taking a pill and expecting to drink like a normal person. You also have to want to be cured.

No, he's not in denial he's very much aware of where he's at but I think that he's just giving up. I told you he's very secretive about anything to do with drinking and he tells me that this tsm is just not working, so we talked about taking the Nal and I find out he's taking it wrong! even though he knows on how to take it. He's been taking half a pill, starts drinking right away on an empty stomach and is sick all the time. He promised me that he'll start to do it right but I'm not convinced.

Sorry to hear this corkit - sounds like he is purposely trying to sabotage his own progress, like he's determined to fail. My therapist said someone with extremely low self esteem might do this. I hope he'll come to see that this is worth fighting for. It's worked for so many, so chances are it would work for him. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he'll see the light. Take care.