For Tambo et al
A couple of weeks ago I stuck my head above the parapet and contributed to the forum. Tambo kindly asked how I was doing with TSM as I had been around since May 2009 so I thought that you may be interested to hear how things went.
Firstly, I am not the alcoholic in this story, but my son had a dire history of drinking starting probably twenty years ago as a social prop, but escalating over the past ten years following an abusive marriage (the abuser being his alcoholic ex).
When I caught up with him he was in a bad way and he came to live with me. I was naïve and completely innocent of all things alcoholic. The only remedy I knew was AA. He did go to one meeting but would not go again. He said it reminded him of the group therapy sessions in “One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest” !!
As far as I could make out he drank for two reasons - to blot out the past and to overcome his anxiety.
His job did not help. As a chef he worked split shifts - full on over the lunch-time service, a couple of hours off, then full on again for the dinner service. And what does one do for a quick relax between shifts and at the end of the day - drink.
And he drank a bottle (70cl.) of gin a day.
So many times he has been in tears saying “I don’t want to be like this”. He did one in-patient detox but the follow-up was so poor that within days he was back to square one. The only thing he knew was to detox himself in the hope that it would do some good. I have seen him through maybe six home detoxes without any medical back-up in the hope that if he cleared the alcohol out of his system he could cut down on his intake. Of course it never worked and I continued to live with this stranger. The lovely, jovial, mild mannered boy that I used to know became a nasty piece of work, staggering around the flat, coming in covered in bruises - you know the story. And my flat smelt of stale gin.
While this was going on I trawled the net and found MWO and bought the Roberta Jewells book but this led me to TSM, “The Cure For Alcoholism” and this forum.
What a steep learning curve this was for me. Since I first signed on I have read every post that has been written. In the early days SpringerRider was my hero, but his was quickly followed by many other success stories. I began to understand so much more about alcoholism and my sons predicament. How grateful I am to everyone who has had the courage to relate their stories. When I read about Crown 86, Firebird etc. who honestly told us of the depths to which they had sunk and finally pronounced themselves cured I had hope. For the first time there was a glimmer of light at the end of the dark tunnel we had been walking through. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your honest, articulate posts.
I bought naltrexone from Alldays and he started taking it. I purchased some 50ml. medicine bottles from E-bay and every day decanted his bottle of gin into these as a way of keeping track of his units. I must say he didn’t have as much faith in TSM as me, mainly because he never goes on the computer and has not read the encouraging posts that I have. At one point he did get down to 35cl. a day. but mostly continued with his bottle of gin a day + nal
Last November he gave up work, saw the doctor for anxiety and was given Citalopram. His anxiety quickly diminished but he was left with the addiction and a bottle of gin a day + naltrexone. So what does he do - yet another detox but this time I found him having a fit and called an ambulance. He was hopitalised for a week (brain scan, vitamin B drip etc.) with severe warnings from the doctor regarding his longevity.
He did drink again after this, but then a remarkable thing happened. About a month ago he stopped drinking again and hasn’t had a drink since. He walks the dog up to ten miles a day, cycles all over the place and for the first time that I can remember is engrossed in his hobbies.
Actually I tell a lie. He did have a drink, an experiment he called it, to see, in his words, if it was exciting - what you call the buzz. But it wasn’t exciting. He didn’t get a buzz. So that is it. He has no wish to drink again and is now three weeks AF.
The amazing thing is that unlike everyone else, he didn’t slowly lessen the amount he drank. Right up to the end he was still drinking his bottle of gin a day but once his work life was sorted out and he had his anxiety pills he was able to stop just like that.
If you’ve got this far thank you for reading this lengthy post.
Its early days, but I have great faith that my life and his are about to be turned around. After years of living with a bottle of gin a day drunk I have finally got my son back.
Chris
Last edited by Chris on Mon Apr 25, 2011 5:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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