Hi everyone. I stumbled across the Sinclair Method while researching alcoholism treatments. I have begun reading Eskapa's book and have read a transcript of Sinclair's seminar interview.

I have been labeling myself an alcoholic for the past 8 months and also for two years (about 15 years ago) as a member of Alcoholics Anonymous. I am not what some people in the fellowship profess to be--A GRATEFUL ALCOHOLIC--and have trouble with following all of the myriad rules of AA which say that if I don't follow the 12 steps I will drink and then die. I have been abstinent since December 23, 2012 and have not relapsed (yet). I voluntarily entered a treatment program in January of 2013 and completed a 45-day stay. I did not require detox and have never been formally diagnosed as an alcoholic (physically dependent on alcohol). It was not a 12-step treatment program but I followed up with AA upon my return home. They (AA) say you can "take what you want (from the program guidelines) and leave the rest" but I am finding that nearly impossible to do because the fellow members kind of blackball you if you do not "FOLLOW THE STEPS" AND "DO EVERYTHING YOUR SPONSOR TELLS YOU TO DO". It is really uncomfortable to try to go to meetings when they are disapproving of you, to say nothing of having any kind of serenity in that type of atmosphere. They were great when I first started but are now really pressuring me to have a spiritual experience and to "confess all my sins and character defects to another person -- preferably my AA Sponsor--in order to have God remove all of the problems and sins of my past and present that will cause me to drink." To refuse to do this is considered "self-will run riot". A religious conversion was not what I thought I was signing up for. I just wanted to stop drinking with other people who were like-minded and make some new friends who were sober.

Preferably I would have liked to continue to drink and to socialize with friends and family who drink except that I didn't like the occasional binges which were embarrassing and stressful and hard on relationships with people I care about. I have not had any DUI's or jail time, etc. In fact many of my friends do not think I am an alcoholic but just that I "overdo" it at times. I was a daily drinker and enjoyed it most of the time but didn't always drink to excess, although stopping at 2 drinks was not my style either. I would say that I used alcohol emotionally for any kind of feeling--good bad or bored. This is all by way of background.

What I would like to do is to try the Sinclair Method which seems to me to be a way to enjoy my family and old friends and activities that offer alcohol (nearly everything) while being able to drink normally without striving for the "high" I associate with alcohol. Am I correct in thinking there is a way to do this and be successful? It seems too good to be true. I would really like to try it but am terribly afraid that it wouldn't work and I would be condemned to starting all over again with the AA program with all of its attendant "I told you so" stuff.

I am a 58-year old female (married to the same man for 34 years) with two grown children who do not live with me. Am I playing with fire here? I feel total abstinence is punitive as well as stigmatizing. I do not think most people really believe alcoholism is a disease and believe you are morally deficient if you are alcoholic.

Can anyone tell me if they have had a similar history and were subsequently successful with the Sinclair Method? Can your brain really be changed by extinction? I have been a heavy drinker since high school with the exception of two pregnancies (abstinent and miserable) and the above-mentioned stints in AA (still miserable). Feel free to e-mail me as this sounds too good to be true.

Thank you for listening. Feedback is more than welcome.

Hi Kaycee, and welcome!

If you really dig into the forums, especially Weekly Progress and Cured, you'll find many, many stories of people who consider themselves alcoholics, who tried many other options, from hypnotism to rehab to AA, yet relapsed time and time again. Then they either stumbled on this method, like you did, or had it recommended by a doctor in lieu of tradtional detox and rehab/abstinence. Which was the case for me.

I've only been doing TSM for two months, and it is definitely making a difference in my consumption and feelings about drinking. But it's also not a panacea; there is still individual work to be done, and it's also not a predictably straight line, and some weeks are better than others - but overall, if you follow the protocol exactly, you should see results, unless you're one of the 20-25% or so that don't respond.

I'm 54 and have had a 30+ year relationship with alcohol, about half was AF, the other was in and out of AA for reasons exactly like you state. I always felt like a fraud, and doomed to relapse since I balked at giving myself over "thoroughly" to the program.

The biggest hurdle for you is that you would have to start drinking again for TSM to work. (Or maybe that'd be an easy choice to make!) No one would suggest that someone who is thriving on abstinence alone should give up that sobriety lightly, but obviously you're still looking for alternatives, or you wouldn't be here. On the other hand, you're already totally AF, and that becomes the ultimate goal for many on this forum, so why would you even dip into the craziness again - just to be able to drink now and then?

I'm totally out of my league on this point, because how would you start? Go back to drinking like you used to? That does sound kind of insane. And yet, that is the insanity of relapse. And if you do derive any satisfaction from AA, you'd either have to keep quiet about TSM, or become even more of an outcast than you already are. I completely gave up AA, with no regrets, and the few real friends I had in the program are probably now skeptical at best.

My advice would be to read, read, read - before you decide to drink again. And if you do at some point make that decision, then yes, for many this program is working to provide an "off" switch when previously there was none. But it, too, is a lifelong commitment.

Good luck, and have fun exploring the forum. If someone's story strikes a chord, just go to their profile, and from there you can access all their posts.

Hi Kaycee,
I agree with writer in that you have to think very carefully before going from abstinent to drinking again to gain benefit from TSM. I know there are some posts from people on here who have tried it. As writer said, read, read, read and you may be able to answer the question for yourself. I remember one thread from someone called sailorbox. It was called "wish to take naltrexone and drink socially" and was in the "Tell us Your Story" section. You may find it useful to read it from beginning to end. He seemed to be in a similar position to yourself. I must confess, it rang alarm bells for me as there seemed to be a gradual increase in intake from his starting position (once or twice a year on special occassions) to a more regular pattern of alcohol consumption. Only you can decide.
Wishing you all the best with whatever you choose,
Ruth.

This has been my goal and two months into the program, still only taking half doses, I already find it easier to stop a night of drinking 5 or 6 beers into the night than I have at any time in my adult life. I've been able to drink socially without getting deep into slurring, brownout territory. I've had a bad night here and there, yes, but on Nal my bad nights have been about the same as mu average weekend nights without it. Over the last months there have been multiple weekend afternoons where I had a beer or two and then just didn't feel like another. I still enjoy the taste and the buzz, but I don't get that euphoric high that I would chase until I was in blackout land. That's HUGE!

So I say go for it! If you have the right attitude and the desire this method might really help you. I don't aim for AF days and have never been a daily drinker, so I can't speak to how it works when that is the sort of drinker you are, but in my experience this will allow you to maintain healthy, normal social drinking without the plunge off a cliff.