Hi,
I found this website from the MWO site and I'm glad that I did. I see a lot of familiar names here and it is very comforting and encouraging. I am 33 years old, female, married with 2 children, and an executive in a high stress job. I started drinking as a teen....just for fun. But, quickly realized I was able to drink more (way more) than most of the boys. I could drink fast and hard and it was very fun and exciting back then. By the grace of God I didn't become "addicted" to the booze back then...but knew that I was naturally high tolerant of the stuff.....I believe that is inherited somehow. My father is/was what I'd call a "binge drinker". He can go years off the stuff and then "BAM" he'll be drinking again. My brother is the same. So, I do beleive there is a strong genetic factor that is predisposed in some of us. Regardless....you have to pour it down your throat yourself and no genetic factor is doing that.....are they? So I have to take ownership of my actions.
Anyhow I excelled in school and didn't drink "abnormally" during high school or college. I got married young and worked my way through school and both my husband and I worked very hard and became successful. We have what people looking in from the outside would say "a perfect life." Except I have this secret...I drink. When I drink I can drink a lot.
I guess it all started about 7-8 years ago. We were on top of the world and were very social in both work and in our private lives. I would have a drink before I started to get ready to go out (a warm up) and then found myself wanting one after I was done getting ready. Then when we were out I was always the first to finish my drink and then I would "drink watch" everyone else. I would try hard to pace myself with the others.....but never could. We would come home and I'd sneak in a drink without him knowing. Then there was the sneaking it the next day to nurse my hangover. I would get my fill and then be fine for several days....but the urge always came back with a vengence.
I got pregnant last year (surprisingly) and didn't find out until I was about 1.5 months and freaked out when I found out....because of course I was drinking up until then (luckily not heavily). I googled "drinking during implantation" (because it was so early on in the pregnancy) and MWO popped up. I got some great support there and went to my doctor and told him my worries and he reassured me it was too early to have caused damage. Anyhow I didn't go back to MWO until after I had the baby (which by the way is prefect!!). I felt so great when I was pregnant....no hangovers...no headaches. Just really healthy. It's funny how when you're sober for a long period of time you trick yourself into thinking you never had a problem to begin with. Well I proved that thought to be wrong pretty quickly. It wasn't long after the baby was born I was back to my old ways and then some. One glass of wine turned into 4 and sometimes 5. Then the sneaking came back into play. Not to mention the depression that came along with postpartum and drinking!! (NOT A GOOD COMBO) I was falling fast.
I should probably mention that my husband is not a big drinker at all. Don't get me wrong he can go out and throw back a few just like the next guy and he does enjoy red wine very much.....but he can probably go the rest of his life without a drink if he had to. I am very envious of him at times. I was always amazed by the people that could have 2-3 drinks and call it a night.....I'm just getting started. It doesn't relax me or put me to sleep. It gives me enery, makes me more outgoing, and gives me this unbelievable "euphoric" feeling. Like a rush of energy. Everytime he'd say "honey I think it's time we go home now" ......I'd be thinking "why don't you want to carry on until you can't stand or talk anymore? Why don't you want to just keep drinking until you can't possible take in another ounce and have to vomit? "
Anyhow, a wonderful person on MWO told me to look up the "sinclair method." She told me to try it out....because I was desperate and at my wits end. I have a teenager and she was starting to catch on to my "secret." I couldn't let this happen to me or most importantly to my family, so I ordered the naltrexone and started it on New Years Day.
I'm proud to report aside from maybe 3 episodes I have been what I have always envied in others. I was skeptical at first and almost gave up many times. But, I held on to hope and faith and somehow made it through 7 weeks now. I think I am now beginning to feel what a lot of others are so excited about. I don't have the desire to get "drunk" anymore. I don't experience that "euphoria" I once did from that first drink......or from any drink actually. Don't get me wrong....I think about that euphoric rush every once in a while, but I also think about the horror stories of what I've said or done while under the influence and this is WAY better. I don't ever want to be that person again.
So sorry about the long post.
Thanks for listening.

Welcome, Angelique!

Same story over here. Perfect life from the outside until you look through my recycle bin, which my husband nicely covers up...but it looks like we have constant parties over here even when it's just me home all week. I too have the next day bottles of beer...I don't get the shakes, it just helps after a big night out. When I am not watching myself I am at 4-5 units of wine (3 large, filled to the brim glasses) a night on my own. More when we have people around. The beauty of MWO and now this site, is you realize how common it is, even if it's not exactly the kind of secret club you'd like to belong to, right? Moms and wine seems to be a theme as well. I wonder if the post-partum is (I had it too...).

Anyway - Thank you so much for sharing your results so far. I am really struggling with whether to start or not. I went to my 2nd doctor visit yesterday and did not walk away with a prescription - instead she agreed she 'may' give me one next week if I make an appointment to see a psychiatrist. I ordered Nal from River yesterday instead...I'm just not ready / willing to do the psychiatrist thing. It's very helpful to someone like me who (even though I ordered Nal) is wondering which course is the right one to take. I want to believe this will work. Sounds like it is for you, I'm glad.

Please keep posting!

Just wondereing - did you tell your husband ? My husband has already been through a year of up and down with me in MWO, so not sure he will be too thrilled about me trying yet another new idea...

Thanks so much for sharing your story Angelique- I actually remember the thread on MWO from the lady who was terrified she may have harmed her baby- I guess that was you, I am so happy all turned out fine.

It is very encouraging for those of us just setting out to hear from people who have been following the method for longer, please do keep us up to date- maybe you can start your own thread on the 'Weekly Progress' section? That is a good way to see how each individual is faring without have to look through all the threads.

I look forward to hearing more!